Chaotic MB/DB

[Anonymous]

I took a second nanny job for weekends and evenings. The couple I work for are lovely and very kind - but they cannot give me a set schedule after three weeks. Because my first obligation is to my full-time nanny job, I made it clear that I am not flexible when I interviewed. MB continues to talk about getting a set schedule but no sign of it yet.

I don't know what to do. It's a good job with good pay but I am burning the candle at both ends right now working evenings I expressly told MB I would prefer not to work and not getting the guaranteed hours I was promised.

How much time should I give this situation before I give notice?

TIA

[Anonymous]

Give *them* a schedule. Sometimes that works best for all.

[Anonymous]

Chaotic people rarely get better, OP. However, give it a few more weeks and set clear boundaries. If it doesn't improve my the end of June, at the latest, give notice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Give *them* a schedule. Sometimes that works best for all.

I'm a MB. Try this. Maybe they can schedule around you if they see it in writing.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I'd do this:

I am available Monday and Wednesday after 6:30pm (give yourself enough time to leave your current job and get to their job without needing a helicopter)

On Thursdays I am available starting at 6pm

Tuesday and Friday not available at all.

See if this helps. But if you can't do it at the time they request at the last minute, DO NOT DO IT or you are not showing them when you are available, you are instead showing that you'll do anything for them, and that's not possible.

You're right, you CANNOT jeopardize your current position by leaving early/arriving late/whatever for this new family. Your first job comes first. Anything else is gravy.

[Anonymous]

I would ask your bosses one LAST final time for a set schedule. State your reason(s) why you need this.

If after a few days, they are unable or unwilling to provide you w/one, then you must tell them you have no choice but to give them your notice.

Let them know that it is too stressful to not have a certain amount of hours guaranteed per week & that you absolutely need this in order for you to look at your schedule and plan ahead.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I'd do this:

I am available Monday and Wednesday after 6:30pm (give yourself enough time to leave your current job and get to their job without needing a helicopter)

On Thursdays I am available starting at 6pm

Tuesday and Friday not available at all.

See if this helps. But if you can't do it at the time they request at the last minute, DO NOT DO IT or you are not showing them when you are available, you are instead showing that you'll do anything for them, and that's not possible.

You're right, you CANNOT jeopardize your current position by leaving early/arriving late/whatever for this new family. Your first job comes first. Anything else is gravy.

MB here. I think this is great advice.

[Anonymous]

Chaotic people are stunningly selfish and self-centered, OP. You either have to have a very low IQ or you have to believe that the rules do not apply to you and that you are special to inflict chaos on other people. Either way RUN - do not walk - away from these people. I promise you your situation will never improve and you will have wasted your time and talents on people who cannot possibly recognize them.

[Anonymous]

OP here - and thank you everyone. I submitted a schedule in writing to my employers blocking out 77 hours over four days in which I am available to work for them. From any of those 77 hours, they have to choose 15 (or more if they like but I am guaranteed 15).

MB seemed very happy to have it and said she would get back to me tomorrow with my days and times for this week.

Hopefully, that will settle the issue.

Again, thanks everyone for the advice.

[Anonymous]

Chaotic people don't change, OP. I would be very surprised if you got a schedule from them today as they are always extremely self-centered.

I hope I am wrong in your case.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - and thank you everyone. I submitted a schedule in writing to my employers blocking out 77 hours over four days in which I am available to work for them. From any of those 77 hours, they have to choose 15 (or more if they like but I am guaranteed 15).

MB seemed very happy to have it and said she would get back to me tomorrow with my days and times for this week.

Hopefully, that will settle the issue.

Again, thanks everyone for the advice.

How did it go?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - and thank you everyone. I submitted a schedule in writing to my employers blocking out 77 hours over four days in which I am available to work for them. From any of those 77 hours, they have to choose 15 (or more if they like but I am guaranteed 15).

MB seemed very happy to have it and said she would get back to me tomorrow with my days and times for this week.

Hopefully, that will settle the issue.

Again, thanks everyone for the advice.

How did it go?

OP here and... you were all correct. Chaotic people do not change. I had to quit. Luckily I immediately found a perfect weekend position with a very kind and organized family.

Again - thanks for the advice.