MBs - How do feel about nanny asking too many questions?

[Anonymous]

I am in my 4th day of a new job. We are currently putting my charge ( 7w) on a schedule. MB and DB have their parental philosophy set in stone and know exactly what they want to be done. Of course a baby will go off routine at times. My MB is pretty strict and my charge has deviated from his feeding or nap routine twice. Both times I have texted MB what I should do in those situations and have asked questions that I just thought about. I would ask DV but he said " IDK. Ask Larla".

My question is would become annoyed or feel your nanny is incompetent because of this? I am an experienced infant nanny and can ( and have) used my best judgement but this MB is precise on what she wants. I don't want to disappoint or her get upset if I don't do something exactly how she wants it done.

[Anonymous]

I fear I may come across as not kniwing what to do or lack of confidence but that simply isn't the case.

[Anonymous]

Why are people trying to put 7 and 8 week old babies on schedules? This seems like a good way to drive yourself insane.

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine putting even a 5 month old on a strict schedule. Let the baby Live it's life that's what a nanny is for

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine putting even a 5 month old on a strict schedule. Let the baby Live it's life that's what a nanny is for

OP here. I'm all with you on this but he is their child and it's their decision. I can only follow what they ask of me. I think it's crazy but it's their choice to make.

[Anonymous]

Yes, it would bother me if my nanny didn't take charge and make the decisions herself. Even though I think your employers are INSANE to try to put the baby on a schedule, you accepted the job and you, of course, need to follow their wishes - but common sense and flexibility must come into play.

[Anonymous]

I think in your case you are better off asking questions.
Nothing wrong with scheduling a baby.

[Anonymous]

Instead of asking "What should I do?" ask "This has happened. Would you like me to blank or blank or something else?"

That at least shows you're not just dumping a problem on someone else, but have thought of possible solutions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it would bother me if my nanny didn't take charge and make the decisions herself. Even though I think your employers are INSANE to try to put the baby on a schedule, you accepted the job and you, of course, need to follow their wishes - but common sense and flexibility must come into play.

I do take charge an go don't ask about everything, just major questions. I do tend to ask because the other day I fed the baby 15 minutes earlier because he was hungry and crying. MB got upset with me because I took him off his routine. Now I ask because I'm afraid she will get upset over the littlest thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Instead of asking "What should I do?" ask "This has happened. Would you like me to blank or blank or something else?"

That at least shows you're not just dumping a problem on someone else, but have thought of possible solutions.

I do exactly as you suggested. I never ask what do. I give a few options using my best judgement or what I believe she wants and leave her to confirm it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it would bother me if my nanny didn't take charge and make the decisions herself. Even though I think your employers are INSANE to try to put the baby on a schedule, you accepted the job and you, of course, need to follow their wishes - but common sense and flexibility must come into play.

I do take charge an go don't ask about everything, just major questions. I do tend to ask because the other day I fed the baby 15 minutes earlier because he was hungry and crying. MB got upset with me because I took him off his routine. Now I ask because I'm afraid she will get upset over the littlest thing.

What did she want you to do? Let a newborn cry from hunger for 15 minutes??

I think you are going to have far greater issues in the near with these dreadful parents than this, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine putting even a 5 month old on a strict schedule. Let the baby Live it's life that's what a nanny is for

My kids weren't even on a schedule in daycare until they were about 5 months old. I remember asking about it as a FTM, and they laughed and told me that they would write down his nap and feeding times and he would find his own schedule soon enough. And he did, as did all of his siblings. I'm sorry. I know this wasn't your question, OP, but this really blows me away. I don't know that it is particularly harmful to the baby, but it just seems like an exercise in futility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it would bother me if my nanny didn't take charge and make the decisions herself. Even though I think your employers are INSANE to try to put the baby on a schedule, you accepted the job and you, of course, need to follow their wishes - but common sense and flexibility must come into play.

I do take charge an go don't ask about everything, just major questions. I do tend to ask because the other day I fed the baby 15 minutes earlier because he was hungry and crying. MB got upset with me because I took him off his routine. Now I ask because I'm afraid she will get upset over the littlest thing.

Oh boy! She got upset because the her newborn got hungry 15 minutes earlier?

Did she tell you what she thought you should have done instead?

She may be for a shock when their carefully crafted routine completely changes a month from now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine putting even a 5 month old on a strict schedule. Let the baby Live it's life that's what a nanny is for

My kids weren't even on a schedule in daycare until they were about 5 months old. I remember asking about it as a FTM, and they laughed and told me that they would write down his nap and feeding times and he would find his own schedule soon enough. And he did, as did all of his siblings. I'm sorry. I know this wasn't your question, OP, but this really blows me away. I don't know that it is particularly harmful to the baby, but it just seems like an exercise in futility.

General routines even schedules are fine, but you can't be so rigid that you disregard the child's needs. If baby is hungry feed. If baby is tire let sleep it's common sense( or at least it should be) they are actually making it harder for themselves. Not all, but most babies settle into a predictable daily rhythm on their own and you can tweak it here and there to make it work for your family.
But if they think what baby is doing at 7 weeks is going to be identical to 7 months well then good luck.

Good luck OP!

[Anonymous]

Op here. They are FTP and I guess her sister practices AP and she doesn't believe in that. She told me they follow a routine so they can manage their weekend outings and because they " didn't want to have to rock a baby to sleep for an hour when he is older or have him eating every hour".

Her suggestion to me about him being hungry was for me to hold him off. They refuse to use pacifiers so he can't even have that to soothe.

I think a routine is great but it's ridiculous to have this regimented routine with a NB.