Haven't heard back after an interview - bad sign, right?

[Anonymous]

MB here- We've been interviewing for a nanny for our two kids. I had three people come out to the house for a trial run and picked the one that we thought was a really great fit for our family. We made her an offer but haven't heard back. I asked her to let us know by a certain date and the date is coming soon. I guess I'm wondering if there is any chance she might still accept? She did mention a couple of times while she was here that it seemed overwhelming to take care of two kids, so maybe that's the issue. Our kids are active, but by no means wild. We emphasize politeness, pleases and thank you's and that kind of thing. One of them even gave her a little something before she left. I know the salary be offered is a couple of dollars higher than what she's making now, and we offer paid benefits and guaranteed hours which I don't think she is getting now. We are also a long-term nanny family so I'd like to think we are good employers since we have experience and always try to treat the person really well. The other two people we met with for a more extended period of time both followed up and expressed how much they want to work with us, but I just didn't feel they were a great fit for the kids. I've never been in this situation before, and I'm finding myself really bummed that she might not want to work with us to the nannies or mb's out there – has this ever happened to you? If so did it work out okay in the end? The rational part of me knows if someone doesn't want to work with us, then of course it's not a good fit. I guess I'm just also exhausted at the thought of starting the search over again.

[Anonymous]

She might just be waiting to see if she gets any other offers.

[Anonymous]

A nanny who tells you, during the interview, that two kids are too much for her, is not a good fit for you.

However much you liked her, you were there and she still found it overwhelming.

If she responds and takes the job, be happy about it, but if she doesn't respond or turns you down, I think you will ultimately be happier with a nanny who can handle more than one child at a time.

[Anonymous]

Mb here. I have to say that you don't sound at all like someone who is experienced at hiring a nanny.

Why on earth would someone who said repeatedly that caring for two kids be your first choice?

The issues about giving a deadline that you're not actually willing to wait for before making assumptions about the candidate only support your inexperience.

[Anonymous]

Just curious, what made you like her so much and then also feel that the other nannies were not a good fit?

Could you possibly be over looking that the others might be good as well, just not AS GOOD as the nanny not responding? I have had some parents tell me in the past that they let one candidate cloud their judgment by wanting her so much, that anyone else paled in comparison. After doing more searching, they realized that one of the other candidates that they thought wasn't a good fit initially, actually would have been the best second choice but lost out on her by turning her down.

I would go over what you liked and disliked about both other candidates and make sure they truly are not a good fit for your family, maybe send a quick short email to the other nanny letting her know you will keep looking if she is not interested. If you don't hear back within a day, then I would say she is not interested and not just waiting to see what any other offers she might get.

Just remember, while it is exhausting to keep the search going, you don't want to give in and pick someone that would not be a good fit for your needs. It's also exhausting for the nannies interviewing, but during my recent search I am glad that it didn't work out with a couple families that I thought might be great, as I found 2 other PERFECT families that had schedules that could work with my current one, giving me the most hours and pay. I am very happy with the ones that I chose and while it took longer, it will be much better in the long-term.

[Anonymous]

Why would you offer the job to someone who told you repeatedly they couldn't do the job?

This can't be real life!


Please, continue your search for a nanny.

[Anonymous]

0P here – thanks. In terms of the other two, I know they are not a good fit for us because one seemed very dependable but lacked the emotional maturity to be able to handle two kids. She even told me that she gets easily stressed when there is a lot going on and she has yelled at her previous family's child. The other candidate was very sweet but I don't think she would be physically capable in terms of energy levels of handling the two kids or lifting either of them when necessary. She was also late to the interview and left early so it definitely out for us! To the previous poster who said we were inexperienced because we were even considering this candidate, I don't think that's a fair critique. Our very first nanny that we worked with for several years with told me in the interview that she was nervous about taking care of our then eight week old baby. I actually really liked her because she admitted that she was nervous going into the situation – which of course I think we were too. Knowing your limitations, and being honest about them in my book is better than someone who says they can do everything and doesn't recognize that there are aspects of the job that are going to be difficult. She was a great nanny and my neighbors were constantly trying to woo her away.

[Anonymous]

OP you are contradicting yourself.

[Anonymous]

OP, why are you only getting candidates who have no confidence (or experience)? None of these people would have made a trial day with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, why are you only getting candidates who have no confidence (or experience)? None of these people would have made a trial day with me.

I'm curious about this as well. She claims she is a reasonable employer that pays well Is it an odd schedule?

Is OP intimidated and threatened by candidates with confidence and experience and turns them away.

[Anonymous]

Interviewing people who are currently FT nannies is always tricky beans. You don't truly know why they are looking for a change. Also, now it's time to bite the bullet and quit. Will she do that?

2 kids is not a big deal. Most families have two, or more, eventually. Why would she make that comment?

[Anonymous]

Yikes folks, OP here. I hope you don't talk to your nannies or families or kids like some of you are writing on here. No need to be judgmental and jump to conclusions. There is a small pool of candidates because it's the middle of winter so most good nannies are already taken by families who hired them before the school year started. We also live in a fairly small market (not DC) where the unemployment rate is low so there aren't that many people looking for jobs. Thanks to those who gave legitimate feedback though. You've given me food for thought and you're right that I need to keep looking. I haven't had to do interviews for a couple years so I need to put some more time and thought into it.

[Anonymous]

OP good nannies are available year round.

I think you are right to reconsider your hiring process.

As a nanny if I am interested in a job you will hear from me.

Heck, if I'm not interested in a job I will let them know right away so they can keep looking.

You can call her if you want, but I strongly suggest you keep looking, going only on what you have here she doesn't seem mature enough and may end up being flaky on the job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Interviewing people who are currently FT nannies is always tricky beans. You don't truly know why they are looking for a change. Also, now it's time to bite the bullet and quit. Will she do that?

2 kids is not a big deal. Most families have two, or more, eventually. Why would she make that comment?

The comment is truly odd. 2 kids is hardly unusual, unless she is used to only dealing with one child. OP did say her children are active, maybe nanny isn't used to dealing with wild children. Although, you think if that's the case she would keep that to herself. I mean we have all been on interviews where in our heads we are thinking "no way in hell is this job for me!" but we don't say it out loud. Just decline. My guess is nanny needs a job, so she doesn't want to turn this job down even though she's unsure about it, she's holding out for a better fit but she's keeping OP around just in case nothing pans out.
I still think instead of chasing her down, OP you should keep looking you can do better.

[Anonymous]

Op if I were you I would keep looking. Strange this nanny didn't get back to you. I always respond within an hr. Make sure you interview nannies who can handle 2 kids.