If you don't wanna know, then don't ask or stay home!

[Anonymous]

I will never understand parents that get upset when you tell them the truth about their child's behavior throughout the day. It's not like I bad mouth the child...I just simply tell them when they ask how their day was and their mood what it really was like. Sometimes their DS is just not nice to other kids and whiney and over dramatic. I tell them as nicely and tactfully as possible just simply stating what happened if they ask and MB seems to get all defensive about it. What is the deal? If ya don't want to know what your child's true behavior is, then stay home and see it for yourself. They overindulge him and seem to be in denial about his tendencies to throw tantrums and such. I'm not going to lie though just to protect their fantasy that their child is some perfect angel. He most certainly is not. How will this kid survive in a school setting if this is how they run things?

[Anonymous]

Most parents don't think so much about their own behavior towards their child. Let them be shocked down the road when the problems explode.

[Anonymous]

No one likes to hear bad news about their kid everyday even if it's true but you're supposed to be on the same team and help come up with answers - is the kid hungry? Tired? In need of more opportunities to work on social skills? If there's not a consistent system of discipline, maybe check out 123 Magic from the library and ask the parents to review it and let you know whether they think they could get on board with a program like that or if they want to suggest a different method.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one likes to hear bad news about their kid everyday even if it's true but you're supposed to be on the same team and help come up with answers - is the kid hungry? Tired? In need of more opportunities to work on social skills? If there's not a consistent system of discipline, maybe check out 123 Magic from the library and ask the parents to review it and let you know whether they think they could get on board with a program like that or if they want to suggest a different method.

+1 Be a part of the solution, Nanny. Don't just report the problem. Suggest ways that your charges behavior could be improved and don;t forget to mention any cute/sweet thing he has done that day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one likes to hear bad news about their kid everyday even if it's true but you're supposed to be on the same team and help come up with answers - is the kid hungry? Tired? In need of more opportunities to work on social skills? If there's not a consistent system of discipline, maybe check out 123 Magic from the library and ask the parents to review it and let you know whether they think they could get on board with a program like that or if they want to suggest a different method.

+1 Be a part of the solution, Nanny. Don't just report the problem. Suggest ways that your charges behavior could be improved and don;t forget to mention any cute/sweet thing he has done that day.

Yes to all of this.

You and the parents should be on the same side. Obviously parents shouldn't be so defensive, neither should nannies be adversarial. You should all be working together on managing behavior/discipline/rules/boundaries/etc...

If you and your employers aren't able to function that way then you're not a good fit for each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one likes to hear bad news about their kid everyday even if it's true but you're supposed to be on the same team and help come up with answers - is the kid hungry? Tired? In need of more opportunities to work on social skills? If there's not a consistent system of discipline, maybe check out 123 Magic from the library and ask the parents to review it and let you know whether they think they could get on board with a program like that or if they want to suggest a different method.

+1 Be a part of the solution, Nanny. Don't just report the problem. Suggest ways that your charges behavior could be improved and don;t forget to mention any cute/sweet thing he has done that day.

Yes to all of this.

You and the parents should be on the same side. Obviously parents shouldn't be so defensive, neither should nannies be adversarial. You should all be working together on managing behavior/discipline/rules/boundaries/etc...

If you and your employers aren't able to function that way then you're not a good fit for each other.

Where do you find that mythical good fit?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one likes to hear bad news about their kid everyday even if it's true but you're supposed to be on the same team and help come up with answers - is the kid hungry? Tired? In need of more opportunities to work on social skills? If there's not a consistent system of discipline, maybe check out 123 Magic from the library and ask the parents to review it and let you know whether they think they could get on board with a program like that or if they want to suggest a different method.

+1 Be a part of the solution, Nanny. Don't just report the problem. Suggest ways that your charges behavior could be improved and don;t forget to mention any cute/sweet thing he has done that day.

Yes to all of this.

You and the parents should be on the same side. Obviously parents shouldn't be so defensive, neither should nannies be adversarial. You should all be working together on managing behavior/discipline/rules/boundaries/etc...

If you and your employers aren't able to function that way then you're not a good fit for each other.

Where do you find that mythical good fit?

I found mine by pure luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one likes to hear bad news about their kid everyday even if it's true but you're supposed to be on the same team and help come up with answers - is the kid hungry? Tired? In need of more opportunities to work on social skills? If there's not a consistent system of discipline, maybe check out 123 Magic from the library and ask the parents to review it and let you know whether they think they could get on board with a program like that or if they want to suggest a different method.

+1 Be a part of the solution, Nanny. Don't just report the problem. Suggest ways that your charges behavior could be improved and don;t forget to mention any cute/sweet thing he has done that day.

Yes to all of this.

You and the parents should be on the same side. Obviously parents shouldn't be so defensive, neither should nannies be adversarial. You should all be working together on managing behavior/discipline/rules/boundaries/etc...

If you and your employers aren't able to function that way then you're not a good fit for each other.

Where do you find that mythical good fit?

How did you find her? Word of mouth, online, agency, DCUM?


I found mine by pure luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one likes to hear bad news about their kid everyday even if it's true but you're supposed to be on the same team and help come up with answers - is the kid hungry? Tired? In need of more opportunities to work on social skills? If there's not a consistent system of discipline, maybe check out 123 Magic from the library and ask the parents to review it and let you know whether they think they could get on board with a program like that or if they want to suggest a different method.

+1 Be a part of the solution, Nanny. Don't just report the problem. Suggest ways that your charges behavior could be improved and don;t forget to mention any cute/sweet thing he has done that day.

Yes to all of this.

You and the parents should be on the same side. Obviously parents shouldn't be so defensive, neither should nannies be adversarial. You should all be working together on managing behavior/discipline/rules/boundaries/etc...

If you and your employers aren't able to function that way then you're not a good fit for each other.

Where do you find that mythical good fit?

How did you find her? Word of mouth, online, agency, DCUM?


I found mine by pure luck!

We found our DC's nanny on care.com. She was by far the best candidate we interviewed and we did due diligence in checking her references and running a background check on her. But in all honesty, nothing told us that she would be as good as she is. I do think it was luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one likes to hear bad news about their kid everyday even if it's true but you're supposed to be on the same team and help come up with answers - is the kid hungry? Tired? In need of more opportunities to work on social skills? If there's not a consistent system of discipline, maybe check out 123 Magic from the library and ask the parents to review it and let you know whether they think they could get on board with a program like that or if they want to suggest a different method.

+1 Be a part of the solution, Nanny. Don't just report the problem. Suggest ways that your charges behavior could be improved and don;t forget to mention any cute/sweet thing he has done that day.

Yes to all of this.

You and the parents should be on the same side. Obviously parents shouldn't be so defensive, neither should nannies be adversarial. You should all be working together on managing behavior/discipline/rules/boundaries/etc...

If you and your employers aren't able to function that way then you're not a good fit for each other.

Where do you find that mythical good fit?

We found ours through a neighborhood referral, and careful interviewing/trusting our gut instincts. Also, we've worked on building a relationship where we're collaborative, open to input from the nanny, but being clear about the things we feel are important to develop and maintain in our family.

I don't think it's mythical. I think this is what happens when reasonable, intelligent, sane people work together.