When a new baby comes...

[Anonymous]

I've been working with this family for 3 eight hour days per week for almost two and a half years (since their now 2.5 year old son was five months old). The mom just had a new baby. She's staying home with the baby for the first 8 weeks, and has asked me to continue watching her son during that time. I asked if her plan was for me to watch both the toddler and the baby together after the 8 weeks. She says she wants to "wait and see" how things go with the new baby first and then "figure it out." Im not sure what that means exactly, but I'm willing to wait and see what happens.

For the record, I have over 11 years of full time nanny experience, college educated, CPR certified, etc. I also have a great deal of experience caring for multiple young children, including caring for newborns and toddlers simultaneously.

My question is, how much money should I charge to watch them both? I'm paid $13/hr for watching their son (I was getting close to the point of asking for a raise for watching him when I found out a new baby was coming; I figured I should wait because I assumed a new baby would mean a raise for me). I'm leaning towards asking $18/hr, but im worried their mom will balk at such a big increase. Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

OP here, thought I should mention a few things that may be relevant:

1) I live in portland, or (I'm from DC and have read here a lot but haven't really posted anything until now; I moved here in June 2012). The going rate for nannies is less here, but the cost of living isn't really /that/ much less than in DC (I share a small, crummy apartment and my share of rent plus utilities is $700/month, if that gives you an idea. Plus I'm still paying off my student loans, etc.)

2) Their family is well off financially, so it's not a question of whether or not they can afford it, but rather, are they willing to pay it. For as "comfortable" as they are, they do seem rather stingy to me (they don't offer me paid sick days or vacation days, etc).

3) Their 2.5 year old son has always been a somewhat difficult child, hasn't napped since he was 18 months old (so I don't get a break at all), has been showing multiple early warning signs of ADHD, and just requires a higher level of care than the average 2.5 year old. (Which I think should factor into my pay rate).

Anyway, in case those things matter, there they are...
Really looking forward to your responses, thanks in advance.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to decide/figure out a couple of things before you say anything to this family. First you need to decide how much you actually want/need this job. It doesn't matter how much this family can actually afford to pay. I think you are the poster in the other thread about birthday presents, right? This family sounds pretty stingy so based on what you have said I don't think asking for an almost 40% raise for a second child will go over well.

What is the going rate for 2 children in Portland, OR? If you think you can easily find a job making $18/hr for 2 children then by all means, ask for the raise. It's highly unlikely you will get it and honestly if it is well above market rate there the family may be frustrated enough to just let you go and find someone else. If you think you can easily find a job for that if they let you go then you have nothing to lose by asking. If you think you deserve $18/hr just because you want it then I would think carefully about the consequences. FWIW it's not saying you don't deserve $18/hr but I don't know what the going rate for a nanny for 2 children is in Portland.

[Anonymous]

I'd start looking for a new job. Your MB's vague reply makes me think she plans to replace you or put the kids in daycare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, thought I should mention a few things that may be relevant:

1) I live in portland, or (I'm from DC and have read here a lot but haven't really posted anything until now; I moved here in June 2012). The going rate for nannies is less here, but the cost of living isn't really /that/ much less than in DC (I share a small, crummy apartment and my share of rent plus utilities is $700/month, if that gives you an idea. Plus I'm still paying off my student loans, etc.)

2) Their family is well off financially, so it's not a question of whether or not they can afford it, but rather, are they willing to pay it. For as "comfortable" as they are, they do seem rather stingy to me (they don't offer me paid sick days or vacation days, etc).

3) Their 2.5 year old son has always been a somewhat difficult child, hasn't napped since he was 18 months old (so I don't get a break at all), has been showing multiple early warning signs of ADHD, and just requires a higher level of care than the average 2.5 year old. (Which I think should factor into my pay rate).

Anyway, in case those things matter, there they are...
Really looking forward to your responses, thanks in advance.

The difficulty of the child does not dictate your pay.

[Anonymous]

It doesn't sound like your MB is particularly happy with your work if she wants to "wait and see". Personally, I would not give you such a huge raise for a second child. Even if I thought your work was great, I wouldn't likely go over an additional $2/hr.

If you decide to ask for a raise, you should really focus on why you deserve one based on the good work you do. Your reasons here are very self involved...your bills, your judgment about what they can afford, how hard you think this job is. These are not good reasons for a raise.

You may need to just find a new job that pays the $18/hr you want.

[Anonymous]

You were a fool for working for $13/hr. You determine your worth. You should find another job before hererr ave is over because she is going to leave you in a lurch.

[Anonymous]

OP I suggest you quietly start your job search. If MB planned to keep you on she would have said so rather then telling you to old hurry up and wait. Get your resume together. Renew any expired credentials. Ask other nannies if they know of any opportunities. Look over your contract to see if you are entitled to severance pay. If you end up staying then no harm done. If not, you'll be perhaps a tad less devastated.

[Anonymous]

Asking for a $5 dollar raise is a lot. I don't think your employers will go for it, and I say that as a nanny.

I think instead of worrying about a raise you need to figure out if you still have a job.
Your MB' s response was very wishy washy.
Get a definite answer from her. You don't want to wait and find out she plans to be a sahm.

Also when you ask for a raise focus on your job performance where you have gone above and beyond, any additional credentials you have o gained etc.
Typically a new baby raise is 1 or 2 dollars.

[Anonymous]

Hmm. Is it worth straight up asking her if she's considering letting me go? I don't think that is her plan, but if she is strongly considering it I feel I have a right to know. Although they are stingy, I do know that she appreciates the high level of care I provide for her son, and says so often.

To the person who said a difficult child shouldn't mean higher pay I disagree. I've worked with special needs children before and they require a higher level of care which is compensated for at a higher rate.

I have just started looking for a new job, just to see what's out there, compare going rates, etc. I've noticed that, especially here

[Anonymous]

Especially here in Portland people don't seem to post nanny jobs as far in advance as they did in DC, everything here seems much mood last minute. That makes it hard to accept a new job and give sufficient notice (I refuse to leave her in the lurch with a newborn and toddler with any less than 3 weeks notice. After all I'd like them to be a good reference.)

[Anonymous]

Sorry, OP here again. I was trying to respond from my phone but that wasn't working well.

So, based on the last response (which was posted as I was typing my response), it sounds like directly asking if my job is in jeopardy is a good idea. However, she JUST had the baby two days ago. I don't think I should ask her about it so soon. Perhaps in another week or so?

[Anonymous]

From your first post I assumed your MB had been on maternity leave for weeks.

I wouldn't force the issue now but definitely before her leave is half up.
Truthfully you should have had the new baby raised figured out before now.

That said it doesn't sound like you are happy worked for this family and generally speaking the sooner you can move on the better.
It is unfortunate you couldn't have worked this out early in the year while mom was still pregnant.
Now no matter what unless you decide to suck it up for a year it is going to be hard for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been working with this family for 3 eight hour days per week for almost two and a half years (since their now 2.5 year old son was five months old). The mom just had a new baby. She's staying home with the baby for the first 8 weeks, and has asked me to continue watching her son during that time. I asked if her plan was for me to watch both the toddler and the baby together after the 8 weeks. She says she wants to "wait and see" how things go with the new baby first and then "figure it out." Im not sure what that means exactly, but I'm willing to wait and see what happens.

For the record, I have over 11 years of full time nanny experience, college educated, CPR certified, etc. I also have a great deal of experience caring for multiple young children, including caring for newborns and toddlers simultaneously.

My question is, how much money should I charge to watch them both? I'm paid $13/hr for watching their son (I was getting close to the point of asking for a raise for watching him when I found out a new baby was coming; I figured I should wait because I assumed a new baby would mean a raise for me). I'm leaning towards asking $18/hr, but im worried their mom will balk at such a big increase. Thoughts?

Every year you should revisit the scope and duties of your contract. Babies become toddlers and then children. Kids go to school or need more driving, etc.
When my family had their second child the three yo went to preschool for most of the day. That was by design so I could focus on the infant/baby.
I did get $0.50 per year raises and am still with the family. As they both got int school programs or elementary school I started doing more things like groceries, cleaning, homework monitoring since no one was in the house most of the day. Works for me, I wanted a longterm job.

See what they want for each child and negotiate something fair. If one kid is signing up for more and more activities or more than a half day, having a nanny can make less sense. Especially if you price yourself out of their budget.

[Anonymous]

I keep typing up a response and then encountering difficulties submitting (possible website server issue??).

Anyway, I kept wanting to discuss the pay issue with her, but it felt odd: " congratulations! Now pay me more!" ??? She definitely knows I charge more for caring for more children; she had a neighbor that was having nanny issues back in late winter early spring and I watched her neighbors toddler along with her own, for $3 extra per hour (it was just for a few hours per week, over the course of a couple months).

When it became pretty clear that she wasn't going to offer me a raise herself before baby's arrival, I approached her a few weeks ago (because I obviously wanted to make certain she knew I was expecting more to care for them both). I brought up the subject of how care for the baby would be handled, and asked if I would be caring for both (figuring she would say not at first, but down the line, and figuring that it would be a good opening into asking for a higher rate). That was when she hit me with the "see how things go, figuring it out later..." bit. That did not seem like a good point for me to start demanding a raise.

I've thought a lot about this. I do want to work for them in the future, but only if they can compensate me fairly. I plan to ask her in two weeks, point blank, in person, if she is considering letting me go. I think her expression will tell me what she's really feeling (and of course I'll be listening closely to what she has to say).

If she answers with an enthusiastic "we love you, of course we won't let you go!" (Which I think there is a decent chance of happening) then I will wait another week or two and send her an email saying something to the effect of "i really enjoy working with your family, but I need to make sure that this is financially possible for me given my changing role with your family (and outline specific things I do for them, above and beyond, etc)..." And I will include wage requirements (I'm thinking $16/hr), and paid time off (including 40 hours/5 days of personal sick days, and being paid for days when I am regularly scheduled but they end up not using me because they are out of town, etc). If she cannot agree to those terms then I will find a new family.

If, on the other hand, her answer is a shifty-eyed "my husband and I are still figuring things out..." Then I will continue my job search in greater earnest and not think twice about giving only two weeks notice.

I'm open to hearing additional suggestions, etc about my new plan of action. Thank you.