If you have a nanny, what do you do when your child is 2-4?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the responses, everyone. To be clear, my son would be 2 years, 4 months when the nanny would start. I asked about the 2-4 age range because he will start public pre-k two years later, at 4.

Sorry, this is the OP again. The infant would be 2 months old, although I could be on maternity leave till 4 or 5 months. I was thinking of having the nanny overlap with my maternity leave because my son would need a new care situation from September on and I don’t want him to transition twice. This could also help him get to know her and have more individual attention at first, and I could have some help with the two kids.

I think the right nanny would be great for your toddler. And by “right” I mean an educated nanny who would engage him, teach him, let him spend hours exploring outdoors (my main complaint with daycare is not enough outdoor time) and keep him socialized with play groups, story times, play dates and maybe a class or two. All would benefit your newborn too.

There is no benefit at all for the newborn in any of the bolded. There is some downside to the newborn in this in as far as his naps would be disturbed.

I disagree completely. Anything that engages a newborn with words, sights, smells, etc is beneficial. “In the world and of the world” and all that. And babies love watching “big kids”. You can schedule easily around naps once a schedule is present.

+1. Too many parents and nannies think infants don’t get bored or need stimulation or engagement. Studies prove that the more words an infant hears increases IQ as well as EQ.

I would like to add that it’s great to take an older child to an infant class too. I brought my three-year-old charge to her brother’s infant class and she loved being the “big kid” and helper. It made her so much more empathetic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the responses, everyone. To be clear, my son would be 2 years, 4 months when the nanny would start. I asked about the 2-4 age range because he will start public pre-k two years later, at 4.

Sorry, this is the OP again. The infant would be 2 months old, although I could be on maternity leave till 4 or 5 months. I was thinking of having the nanny overlap with my maternity leave because my son would need a new care situation from September on and I don’t want him to transition twice. This could also help him get to know her and have more individual attention at first, and I could have some help with the two kids.

I think the right nanny would be great for your toddler. And by “right” I mean an educated nanny who would engage him, teach him, let him spend hours exploring outdoors (my main complaint with daycare is not enough outdoor time) and keep him socialized with play groups, story times, play dates and maybe a class or two. All would benefit your newborn too.

There is no benefit at all for the newborn in any of the bolded. There is some downside to the newborn in this in as far as his naps would be disturbed.

I disagree completely. Anything that engages a newborn with words, sights, smells, etc is beneficial. “In the world and of the world” and all that. And babies love watching “big kids”. You can schedule easily around naps once a schedule is present.

What? A newborn cannot see beyond 8 to 15 inches away. What are you gonna do, stick him into the story time lady's face? A newborn baby can see his mother's or nanny's face when they are right next to him and talking to him, and not much else. So no, they aren't going to love watching big kids - as far as newborns are concerned, "big kids" beyond their line of sight might as well be clouds. And just what sort of smells are we talking about? A playdate smell?

Newborns don't have schedules. By the time a schedule emerges, they are no longer newborns.

I mean I get it if you have the drag the baby to wherever the 3-year old is going - you're doing the best with what you can. We've all been there. But let's not make virtue out of necessity and pretend that this is in any way better for the baby than baby-focused care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
+1. Too many parents and nannies think infants don’t get bored or need stimulation or engagement. Studies prove that the more words an infant hears increases IQ as well as EQ.

I would like to add that it’s great to take an older child to an infant class too. I brought my three-year-old charge to her brother’s infant class and she loved being the “big kid” and helper. It made her so much more empathetic.

All the stimulation an infant needs is the face and words of his caregiver. A room full of noisy kids has zero value for the infant.

I can't imagine a dummy parent who thinks "infant classes" have any value. Everyone knows these classes are an outlet for the parent, not the infant. Everything they do in "infant classes", an adequate nanny can do at home much more easily. Don't you have blocks or rattles? Don't you know any songs? Here's your infant class, gratis. Plus you don't have to excuse yourself and drag a three-year old to the bathroom with you if the baby decides to reward your efforts with a blowout.

I make an exception for the pool except it's not really a class.

Your three-year old would rather run in the park any day of the year than sit in a room full of babies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the responses, everyone. To be clear, my son would be 2 years, 4 months when the nanny would start. I asked about the 2-4 age range because he will start public pre-k two years later, at 4.

Sorry, this is the OP again. The infant would be 2 months old, although I could be on maternity leave till 4 or 5 months. I was thinking of having the nanny overlap with my maternity leave because my son would need a new care situation from September on and I don’t want him to transition twice. This could also help him get to know her and have more individual attention at first, and I could have some help with the two kids.

I think the right nanny would be great for your toddler. And by “right” I mean an educated nanny who would engage him, teach him, let him spend hours exploring outdoors (my main complaint with daycare is not enough outdoor time) and keep him socialized with play groups, story times, play dates and maybe a class or two. All would benefit your newborn too.

There is no benefit at all for the newborn in any of the bolded. There is some downside to the newborn in this in as far as his naps would be disturbed.

I disagree completely. Anything that engages a newborn with words, sights, smells, etc is beneficial. “In the world and of the world” and all that. And babies love watching “big kids”. You can schedule easily around naps once a schedule is present.

What? A newborn cannot see beyond 8 to 15 inches away. What are you gonna do, stick him into the story time lady's face? A newborn baby can see his mother's or nanny's face when they are right next to him and talking to him, and not much else. So no, they aren't going to love watching big kids - as far as newborns are concerned, "big kids" beyond their line of sight might as well be clouds. And just what sort of smells are we talking about? A playdate smell?

Newborns don't have schedules. By the time a schedule emerges, they are no longer newborns.

I mean I get it if you have the drag the baby to wherever the 3-year old is going - you're doing the best with what you can. We've all been there. But let's not make virtue out of necessity and pretend that this is in any way better for the baby than baby-focused care.

You do you. I’m a former preschool teacher and nanny and have seen the enormous benefits of infant engagement/ sense stimulation. You don’t have to believe me. I don’t argue.

[Anonymous]

You taught newborns in your preschool? What a unique facility!

A good nanny can stimulate an infant without dragging him to places where he doesn't belong.