Our nanny just quit, without notice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have had jobs where the parents work from home and it has never worked out for me. They say at the beginning they will be working in an office but eventually they are hovering. It is hard to be in charge of the kids when they go ask the parent after you have said no to them and the parent says yes. Then the parents want you to have control when they are not around but the children do not have respect for you when this happens all the time. For me, it just does not work. I won't do it again!

It's all nice advice, but have you ever met a nanny who wants a parents breathing down her neck? From what I hear, they all say, "never again".

[Anonymous]

I don't work at home but my nannies previous family did. She said it was fine and the fact that he previous reference was around daily to observe her in action made me more confident in deciding to hire her. She's amazing and I do think that hiring someone who is comfortable with the parents being home makes it more likely that you will get a great nanny. I have never had any of the problems with cell phones, napping all day, watching TV, not doing tasks, and not engaging the kids that you hear about on this board.

In contrast, the nannies on this board want no supervision because they want to do their own thing, entertain themselves, and "pretend" they are busy working. OP- your nanny did you a favor. It may be inconvenient to search for a new nanny but you want one that is interested in the job nit getting paid to do whatever she wants and run her own errands everyday.

[Anonymous]

Or it may be useful to learn what a nanny is, and isn't.
Hint: A warm body who agrees to be in your house with your child is not a nanny.

[Anonymous]

I hate when people say troll but this one so obviously is. No mom would say she goes to check on her kid " on a whim". Dear lord people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate when people say troll but this one so obviously is. No mom would say she goes to check on her kid " on a whim". Dear lord people.

Have you considered that this parent is simply being honest?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't work at home but my nannies previous family did. She said it was fine and the fact that he previous reference was around daily to observe her in action made me more confident in deciding to hire her. She's amazing and I do think that hiring someone who is comfortable with the parents being home makes it more likely that you will get a great nanny. I have never had any of the problems with cell phones, napping all day, watching TV, not doing tasks, and not engaging the kids that you hear about on this board.

In contrast, the nannies on this board want no supervision because they want to do their own thing, entertain themselves, and "pretend" they are busy working. OP- your nanny did you a favor. It may be inconvenient to search for a new nanny but you want one that is interested in the job nit getting paid to do whatever she wants and run her own errands everyday.

Read the thread before you feel the need to assert your insulting, baseless opinion. Most, if not all, of the nannies who have replied have gave very clear reasons for not wanting to work with SAH/WAHM and they have nothing to do with wanting to "get away with things" unsupervised. It is incredibly difficult to perform one's job to the best of one's ability when an individual constantly feels scrutinized and undermined. Simply put, you are never going to get a Nanny at their best when you around all day because they will never TRULY be able to do his/her job.

[Anonymous]

Well said, 10:08.

[Anonymous]

I don't think it maters if this is a troll or not, it still provides a vehicle for a meaningful conversation. I have worked for work at home parents and after my last one thought never again. It was a family I had been with a year and a half at that point. When I started they had a7 mo old and I asked all the right questions to make sure it would work. Two months later the mom was laid off and then found it she's pregnant too. They ended up moving so kept me on. I found a couple more families who needed part time care and we formed a share and they kept me on and the kids came to my house while the moms were on maternity leave. The share more or less disbanded when the moms returned to work. This tine around working at home with the dad home too was more challenging. The baby was teething with six teeth and screamed much of the day. The mom was saving milk she pumped in Wed for the baby to drink on Monday and it was bad and the baby screamed more. It was really stressful. The two year old I'd been with since infancy was going through a daddy phase and was constantly crying for dad, and every time dad came out of his office it stayed again. It was hard to go anywhere because the baby wouldn't nap in the stroller and still took three naps a day. It was a disaster fir a couple of months. Things finally started to work themselves out with regard to the baby and the mom decided she hates her job and quit. So, they no longer need me. In June I was ready to quite even though they're a great family, but I stuck it out and now the only jobs I can find are after school care.

My advice us to give it a couple weeks to work out and I'd it doesn't, then start looking. If it's not working fir you, it's probably not working fir them either. This was a really nice family but it was still stressful. The dad was the ideal work at hinge parents personality wise, but it was still much harder than it would have been if he weren't hinge or if we were at someone elses house.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like it may be best for both of you that the nanny is moving on. And it sounds like you more or less told her to look for a new job, which may ahve motivated her to leave before you got around to firing her. But she should not have quit without notice; this is not a situation where one walks of the job.

I am a little startled and perplexed about all the negative comments about parents who work from home -- My husband works from home, and we have no problems (yet) working with nannies. Obviously our experience is limited to just our family and two nannies so far (who are both with us; we have two because one went back to school and wanted a limited schedule). But I don't think either nanny would agree that we are difficult employers.

When the nanny arrives, my husband hands over DH and dives into this telecommuting work. He is within earshot anytime the nanny and DS is in the house (we have a small house). DS knows where he is and they may see each other during lunchtime, etc. However, my husband also doesn't interfere with what is going on; he lets the nanny do her thing and only steps in if the nanny approaches him first or clearly needs something. I do the same thing when I work from home (which is rare), except I chat more to ask how things are going, etc., since I am ordinarily MIA.

Our philosophy is that if we like the nanny, we should just let her be in charge and enjoy the opportunity to work or rest. And since we overhear quite a bit, we'd know if things were not working.

Perhaps the situation would be really hard if DS was really clingy. So far, he seems very comfortable with Daddy being around and the Nanny being around, and doesn't try too hard to ditch the Nanny for Dad.

I suppose there are numerous ways we could interfere too, and we do not. Perhaps some telecommuting parents may need to try to disengage. Find someone who is a good match and who your child likes, and leave them alone. (If you can't leave them alone, you have the wrong person.)

I hope too many nannies are not deterred from working with telecommuting parents. For us, the arrangement has been really wonderful. Our child has caregivers who give him some wonderful one-on-one time, and he has more time with us as well (well, with my husband, at least). The life-work balance has been positive for us and DS.

[Anonymous]

"Clear boundaries" are key, as described by 12:01.
It will not work any other way, at least not for long.

[Anonymous]

I can understand both sides, however, I am a nanny as well. I would not appreciate you ruining any chance that I might have of bonding with your child. He/she needs to bond with their nanny almost as much as they do with their mom.

[Anonymous]

Where are you? I know a very good nanny who does not mind WAHMs and can work part time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where are you? I know a very good nanny who does not mind WAHMs and can work part time.

What is her experience with WAHMs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where are you? I know a very good nanny who does not mind WAHMs and can work part time.

What is her experience with WAHMs?

She worked for me when I was a WAHM , I am not sure about arrangements in her other families. She's looking for a part-time job.

[Anonymous]

I agree that it CAN work out with a parent who telecommutes and a nanny, but the parent who works from home must respect the nanny's position for it to work. From what the OP wrote, she did not. She wanted her cake and she wanted to eat it too. She wanted the luxury of working from home and she she wanted access to her child anytime she wanted to. What kind of nanny would be okay with such a set up? As nannies, we pride ourselves in our abilities in providing excellent care to the children we care for. The OP interfered with this nanny's ability to provide this level of care.