Tantrum advice

[Anonymous]

Just started a job caring for 3 little ones ages 4 months, 20 months, and 5 years old.

the 5 year old started morning kindergarten last week.

The family rule is he needs to rest quietly for 1 hour and then he can do a quiet activity like coloring.

When I started over the summer he was good with this since school has started it's been a struggle and today was the worst he threw his toys, bedding, and screamed off and on for the hour. This started when he asked to play a game and I reminded him o the resting rule. He threw his stuffed dog at me. I took the dog away ad told him that wasn't acceptable.

Making it difficult to get the other 2 down for sleep.

How should I approach MB and DB about this?

How can I better manage things with him?

[Anonymous]

The hr doesn't start until you calm down. It will get worse before it gets better but stick to it.

[Anonymous]

This is him responding to school starting. Have you cared for a new kindergartener before? It is ROUGH! The schedule is really intense and especially for active kids it is a lot of rules and expectations and not enough movement.

Figure out what he needs most. One boy I cared for was worn out and needed to sit on my lap quietly for 20 minutes (he was a "touch" love language kid 100%), another girl needed to play with toys alone for 20 minutes (classic introvert), another girl was starving and needed a snack right away, another kid needed to have some rough play/physical outlet, so we would go outside for 20 minutes and get really wild.

Figure out what he needs and do THAT before starting rest time. Then, follow PP's advice and explain that a) rest time is happening, b) it starts when he is on his bed and quiet, c) if he won't stay on his bed or won't be quiet then the clock starts over. I would say something like "how would you like to spend your time? You can run around and yell right now, but will still have rest time after and will miss out on playing X with us later, OR you can rest queitly and then you will have 2 whole hours to choose what to play."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is him responding to school starting. Have you cared for a new kindergartener before? It is ROUGH! The schedule is really intense and especially for active kids it is a lot of rules and expectations and not enough movement.

Figure out what he needs most. One boy I cared for was worn out and needed to sit on my lap quietly for 20 minutes (he was a "touch" love language kid 100%), another girl needed to play with toys alone for 20 minutes (classic introvert), another girl was starving and needed a snack right away, another kid needed to have some rough play/physical outlet, so we would go outside for 20 minutes and get really wild.

Figure out what he needs and do THAT before starting rest time. Then, follow PP's advice and explain that a) rest time is happening, b) it starts when he is on his bed and quiet, c) if he won't stay on his bed or won't be quiet then the clock starts over. I would say something like "how would you like to spend your time? You can run around and yell right now, but will still have rest time after and will miss out on playing X with us later, OR you can rest queitly and then you will have 2 whole hours to choose what to play."

Not op, but I just started with a 3 and 6 year old and this makes SO much sense.
I have never considered applying love languages to this job but rather focused on it with my partner.

You sound like a superb nanny!

[Anonymous]

7:54 here. Thanks! The first time I had a kindergartner, I thought the kid was losing her mind. With experience I have also gained perspective and found that when kids get what they need, they are better able to do what you need from them.

[Anonymous]

OP here thanks for the tips!

This is only my second nanny job and first with a kindergartner.

Things went much better today.