Nanny References

[Anonymous]

How do you nannies handle giving potential families references? Do you give every family you interview with a list of references before they've even decided to narrow you down as a candidate? I have 3 references so if I gave every family the list, my references would be getting called a lot. And sometimes after having an interview with a family, there are times where I can tell this is a family I don't want to work for. However they've asked for references during the interview and I don't want to say no, I don't think your family will work for me and decline the request just because I hate telling a family that they aren't a good fit for me. So I end up giving all potential families my references regardless if they've decided on me or even if I know I don't want to work for the family. My fear is the references i have will start becoming annoyed with me by getting so many calls. I can see both sides to this issue. On one hand I completely understand a parent needing references before deciding on candidates cause this is their child they are trusting the nanny with, but then on the other hand as a nanny you want to protect your references and not overuse them so they'll continue to be good references for you and not be annoyed by the constant calls.

[Anonymous]

I email my resume with references before we do a phone interview. Some families opt not to call references until after an in person interview.

[Anonymous]

In my experience people only call references when they're very serious about hiring. It's quite a bit of work on the employer's side too, so most people don't bother unless they're serious about a candidate.

As a note, I too find it difficult telling a family that they aren't the right fit for me after an interview. My go to excuse has become "the commute". Families rarely know precisely where I live at that stage, and the commute is not something that can be changed or negotiated. I've found it's really gotten easier to remove myself from the running this way.

[Anonymous]

I've used the commute excuse as well. I actually just interviewed with a family that lives 40 minutes away, and with 3 kids they only wanted to pay $10 an hour. So instead of saying it was the pay, I just said the commute was too long. But I guess saying pay is an appropriate excuse as well, although I fear it makes me come off as greedy and only caring about the money. But I got to be able to pay my bills.

With a family I don't click with and can tell their personality is going to be one thats difficult to work with, I usually end up telling a lie and saying I accepted another position. I feel badly lying, but there's really no good excuse when you live close by. You can't nicely say that you just don't think you'd end up liking them.

[Anonymous]

You Girls should say the true. I believe open conversation. I never give my references unless I am really interested . The family- nanny match must be good for both sides.