Need Advice Please.....
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Anonymous
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I have been working my current position for a year now and for some reason, I swear, something hit me this afternoon and work and it hit me suddenly.
All of the sudden, I felt unhappy w/my job. At first, I thought perhaps I was just tired so I came home and took a nap. But I still feel the same and am wondering why I feel so disenchanted so out of the blue... I work part-time, 20-25 hrs. per wk. for one child at 12/Hr. The parents are nice to me + I have a wonderful bond w/the almost 2 yr. old little boy. Yet some things that didn't bother me for the past year are all the sudden getting to me. For example, I am not allowed to drive him anywhere, only walk him down the block to the park in his stroller or wagon. It's okay, but after a year I guess you could say I am feeling bored of the same park. We can also visit the local library, but they have Legos and other toys there, and when I take him there, he tends to get loud which is expected for a typical child his age...Yet the library patrons are not happy!!  Lol.
The weather has been really hot/humid where we live at so taking these walks always leaves me drenched in sweat when I get home. They have no backyard area to play in. I so wish I could take him in my air-conditioned car to an indoor mall or just somewhere, anywhere different than the same two places! Also, while he watches a LOT of T.V. when his parents are home, when I am there there is a strict no screen time rule. Now before you bash me, hear me out. I completely understand there are nannies that use the T.V. to entertain their charges and I also understand that it is this family's right to make whatever rule they wish to enforce for me and if I don't like it, I know where the door is...However I am not going to lie...It sorta irks me when I get there to see them hurriedly shut off "Curious George" as soon as I enter or turn it on the minute I walk out the door. Since I work 9 hr. days, if I could have a 1/2 hr. a day to use it while I make his lunch or when he gets bored or cranky it would make my job a tad bit easier, but it is what it is. I think what is making me feel this way is that while this is a stable regular hours type position, I do babysitting gigs for families on my days off during the weeks and sometimes on weekends. While these families cannot offer me the same hours, they do pay me more, $15/Hr. at least plus they do not give me any restrictions on T.V. use or taking the kids out. Anyway, my charge has started playing some fun and educational games on the i-pad which have been entertaining him throughout the day, yet this morning at work his mother told me that she doesn't want me to let him spend any more than fifteen minutes on it daily. Again her rules, I know, but still.............. Your thoughts/Opinions, etc.? How would you feel if you were in my shoes? |
Anonymous
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I'd look up activities in the area (actual activities, not an indoor mall) and say "I saw there's story time/a puppet show/another park I'd really like to take junior to. Do you think we could discuss the possibility of my driving him places?"
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Anonymous
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Can you take him on public transport to different places? Are there other nannies you could arrange playdates with? You also need to get creative with activities he can do while you are making lunch, which is really hard at that age I know ... maybe a special craft or superheroes colouring book, or a special toy that is only used at that time? I bet the parents would appreciate if you take the initiative to make sure he has lots of fun and different experiences, even if the environment is a bit limited. Check out 'The Toddlers Busy Book' for some inexpensive craft ideas. You might also want to let the parents know that you think he needs more stimulation ... it shouldn't be about you. But if it really is, i.e. you just don't like it and think you should be making more money, I hate to say this but maybe you need a different job. (from a MB)
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Anonymous
| I think you are lazy nanny . |
Anonymous
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I agree with pp you are either lazy or inexperienced. Do some research and find indoor play places or children's museums going to the mall wouldn't come off to me as fun for my child but more for you to get out and possibly do shopping. Do you have a vehicle with proper restraints?
What types of activities do you do with him? I don't know how old you are but there was a time when we didn't have iPads to entertain and "teach" children. Yes all my charges have been allowed screen time but I rarely use it and save it for sick days and special movie days. You said the library has Legos and he gets loud, does he have Legos at home, have you told your boss what toys he seems to really enjoy at the library? Maybe she could purchase some of the things he likes so he can play with them at home. You should be coring, painting, playing with play doh, thriving trucks around the room, make forts there are so many indoor activities you can do at home. To make the park more exciting take bubbles, chalk, have a picnic. Are there any kids around that are close to his age? |
Anonymous
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I do not know where some of these respondents live at, but where I live at, most of our indoor malls are not only air-conditioned they are also geared toward young children. They offer full-sized merry go rounds, kid sized trains (complete w/a costumed conductor who says "All aboard" upon boarding!) as well as a huge play area w/fun + unique play equipment so the parents can rest their feet after hours of shopping. The person who responded that the OP only wanted to visit a mall so she could shop is simply uneducated and quite ignorant in my opinion.
OP, as a mother who employs a nanny I must say that I think your boss is making a huge mistake that I see many mothers make. She is putting her own wants/desires in front of her child's and it is only hurting her child in the long run. By having a nanny with so many restrictions, she is ensuring an unhappy nanny (who wouldn't be?!) and a nanny who isn't one hundred percent happy in her job is never a good thing especially when there are children involved. Your job is very low paying. For any part of the country, I am sorry to say. That is peanuts. You can find something much better than a twelve dollar an hour job. I pay my teenage neighbor much more than that. Also, you can find a family who will won't be so selfish as to only give you limited mobility to take the child. To only offer you two outdoor venues to go to is just ludicrous in my opinion. And the fact that there is no outdoor space and you have to spend the whole day indoors would drive me stir crazy. Even with play-doh, puzzles, arts & crafts, etc., that poor little boy is going to get bored and restless. A two year old needs a change of scenery and needs stimulation. He needs to get out and about and out of the house. If he can only go to the same park and the same library he will get pretty antsy after awhile. Shame on his mom for being such a selfish parent. This seriously sounds like a job from hell. It is your call, but I would leave. |
Anonymous
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I have been a nanny and am now a Mom so can see this from both sides.
I hate the heat in the summer, I wouldnt expect a nanny to do anything I wouldnt want to do myself. If its hot and humid I would rather you and my kid go to an indoor play area somwhere than sweat it out in a park. Same goes for when its freezing. What area are you in? Can you check out gym or music classes near you and then ask the Mom if you could take him once a week. If you asked to go to a specific place would she be ok with it? Are there other nannies or Moms you know from the park you could arrange a playdate with? I don't care how much you love kids, It gets boring doing play doh, playing dolls, coloring, day in day out. |
Anonymous
+1. Also, if you work 9 hr days how is it part-time 20-25 hrs per week? there is a lie here somewhere. Go to the mall on your own time. |
Anonymous
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I'm an MB and I do understand how hard it is to not be able to drive anywhere. I think your MB is being unreasonable about that. I also understand that it seems unfair that your MB/DB rely on so much screen time when you aren't allowed to use it at all but when you complain about it and say you want to be able to let your charge watch tv so you can make lunch it does make you come across as lazy. Granted, it makes your MB and DB look lazy too but that doesn't make it right for you. I say this as an MB with 3 children under 4 who manages to make 3 meals a day without ever using screen time to distract the kids while I do it. If I can manage it with 3 you shouldn't be complaining about not being able to make lunch for 1 without it.
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Anonymous
3x a week. |
Anonymous
| I suggest to start looking for another job. You have finally noticed how the mom micromanages you. Trust me I have been there. The parents will continue to just plop down their kid in front of the tv or have the kid unlimited time on the ipad. You will start to grow resentment towards the family. I suggest you look for another family who will pay you a FAIR hourly wage because 12hr is too low and on top of that you are not allowed to drive the kid anywhere. I highly suggest to look for another job as I said before I have been in your situation. |
Anonymous
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Unless you are prepared to speak to the NF about your frustrations, I'd start looking for a new job.
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Anonymous
3x9=27 last time I checked. Going to the mall is a cop out, look for other activities or ask for parents to suggest what would they want their kid to attend. As a MB I can tell you that nanny wanting to go the mall with the kids is a total deal breaker for me. This is not why people hire nannies. |
Anonymous
Wow....2 Hours to be exact. As any nanny knows and even mom bosses, nanny hours can fluctuate by the week at times. You sound quite anal to me PP. 
And why would an air-conditioned indoor mall in a hot inland area be such a bad idea to take a two year old child? Have you been to Palm Springs, Bakersfield or Vegas in August??! Didn't think so. Or try any city in Texas. Yikes. Many indoor malls are like mini-Disneylands these days w/full-size carousels, train rides that play music that take kids around the whole mall as well as colorful play areas with plastic balls to jump in and tunnel slides, etc. What two year old wouldn't love that? Anyway, this PP knows nothing about hiring a nanny OP. What strikes me about your posting is that I think your boss actually looked at the iPad and checked to see how many things you and the kid looked at, then that is when she told you to limit yourself. That in itself creeps me out. I cannot imagine my boss taking the time to look at her iPad just to check what me and her kid were looking at, how many sites we visited and for how long. That is a little creepy to me. I think you should move on. Your boss sounds a little too involved to me. |
Anonymous
| You are the underline and italics troll. Find something better to do. |