Best way to fire nanny

[Anonymous]

We've had a nanny since march and she is a sweet girl. However, she is "ditzy" and quite irresponsible and I can't afford to have her making the same mistakes all the time. She is always late. Always. She will often say "Oh, I did ____ by mistake. I don't know why I did that." or "I forgot to _____. I don't know why I didn't do it."
Anyway, about a week ago she just didn't show up one monday. Just didn't call, didn't anything. She had asked for friday off, which I said was no problem, since she asked enough in advance. She was going out of town. On thursday before she left, we had a conversation about how I really needed her on monday, had a busy day, blablabla and asked her not to forget that monday was the day I had asked her to stay later. She said that wasn't a problem and that she felt bad because that sounded like it would be a long, stressful day for me. So monday comes along and she didn't come. Didn't call, didn't text, nothing. I call her and she still wasn't back from her trip. I was so mad, I just hung up. The next day she comes and I had a sit down with her to try to understand WTH she did that. Well her answer was "I don't know what I was thinking. Now that you mention it, I do remember you said you needed me and had a long day on monday. I must have thought that was tuesday." (She always works mondays.)
Since I can't afford to have to scramble for child care like this last minute, I have decided that for this, and many other reasons, it's time to let her go. However, as much as I felt like screaming when this whole thing happened, she is really sweet and my kids love her. She is just too inattentive and it makes me think she can make really serious mistakes that can both harm me/my job or, worst, harm my kids. I don't want to hurt her feelings, though... How do I go about telling her that she is done? (I have already found a replacement.)

[Anonymous]

I would email her ASAP
Nanny
I am writing this letter with sadness and regret.
Due to your irresponsible actions over the last few weeks DH and I have come to the conclusion that you are no longer the right fit for our family. We need consistency in our schedule and we don't feel that you are able to provide that. I have sent you your pay via e transfer and I wish the best for you in the future.

Sincerely
MB

[Anonymous]

Obviously sweeten it up a bit

[Anonymous]

OP, are you an adult? How have to made it this far in life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you an adult? How have to made it this far in life?

Thank you, this is extremely helpful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you an adult? How have to made it this far in life?

You understand that OP is not the nanny, right? Because I believe the question we need to be asking here is how has this nanny made it this far in life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you an adult? How have to made it this far in life?

My mother is 64 and has never fired anyone in her entire life.

Op's nanny needs a telemarketing job or a gig at old navy. Someplace where others can absorb her screw ups.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you an adult? How have to made it this far in life?

Thank you, this is extremely helpful.

One long rambling paragraph is extremely helpful. Funny how we keep seeing the same op writer with many different stories.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you an adult? How have to made it this far in life?

Thank you, this is extremely helpful.

One long rambling paragraph is extremely helpful. Funny how we keep seeing the same op writer with many different stories.

You are the poster who calls everyone a troll. Stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We've had a nanny since march and she is a sweet girl. However, she is "ditzy" and quite irresponsible and I can't afford to have her making the same mistakes all the time. She is always late. Always. She will often say "Oh, I did ____ by mistake. I don't know why I did that." or "I forgot to _____. I don't know why I didn't do it."
Anyway, about a week ago she just didn't show up one monday. Just didn't call, didn't anything. She had asked for friday off, which I said was no problem, since she asked enough in advance. She was going out of town. On thursday before she left, we had a conversation about how I really needed her on monday, had a busy day, blablabla and asked her not to forget that monday was the day I had asked her to stay later. She said that wasn't a problem and that she felt bad because that sounded like it would be a long, stressful day for me. So monday comes along and she didn't come. Didn't call, didn't text, nothing. I call her and she still wasn't back from her trip. I was so mad, I just hung up. The next day she comes and I had a sit down with her to try to understand WTH she did that. Well her answer was "I don't know what I was thinking. Now that you mention it, I do remember you said you needed me and had a long day on monday. I must have thought that was tuesday." (She always works mondays.)
Since I can't afford to have to scramble for child care like this last minute, I have decided that for this, and many other reasons, it's time to let her go. However, as much as I felt like screaming when this whole thing happened, she is really sweet and my kids love her. She is just too inattentive and it makes me think she can make really serious mistakes that can both harm me/my job or, worst, harm my kids. I don't want to hurt her feelings, though... How do I go about telling her that she is done? (I have already found a replacement.)

Just say the true ,be honest is the best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would email her ASAP
Nanny
I am writing this letter with sadness and regret.
Due to your irresponsible actions over the last few weeks DH and I have come to the conclusion that you are no longer the right fit for our family. We need consistency in our schedule and we don't feel that you are able to provide that. I have sent you your pay via e transfer and I wish the best for you in the future.

Sincerely
MB

Even a ditzy nanny needs a chance to say good-bye to the children. I would tell her in person and let her gather her things and say her good-byes. It will be painful but it is the best for the kids in the long run.

[Anonymous]

You have only had her for a short time, so I would not be too worried about the children's broken attachment to her. If this was happening repetitively, then I might feel differently, but assuming you have had pretty consistent care most of their lives with the exception of this short term nanny, then I would not worry about that too much. Just bite the bullet and tell her that you cannot absorb the consequences of her inconsistency and irresponsibility. You wish her the best, but need a childcare provider who will actually provide childcare at the times scheduled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you an adult? How have to made it this far in life?

Thank you, this is extremely helpful.

One long rambling paragraph is extremely helpful. Funny how we keep seeing the same op writer with many different stories.

+1

Just fire her, OP? It's a pretty straightforward process and you can do it in person or remotely, just give written notice either way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have only had her for a short time, so I would not be too worried about the children's broken attachment to her. If this was happening repetitively, then I might feel differently, but assuming you have had pretty consistent care most of their lives with the exception of this short term nanny, then I would not worry about that too much. Just bite the bullet and tell her that you cannot absorb the consequences of her inconsistency and irresponsibility. You wish her the best, but need a childcare provider who will actually provide childcare at the times scheduled.

+900. THIS.

[Anonymous]

Since you have already found a replacement (good work OP!!), I would let her go immediately.

No need for any standard 2-week notice or severance pay.

Why so?
She majorly screwed you over BIG time by not showing up Monday when you stressed to her how important it was that she show up that day. She didn't have the courtesy to even call you or text you so she is toast.

She left you in the lurch and there is nothing else that you can do for her.

She may be a sweetheart and your kids may love her and I get that.

But event though she is a sweet person in general, her work ethic sucks.