How do I tell my nanny she needs smells

[Anonymous]

We really like our nanny but we have noticed recently that some days she has come to work smelling as if she has worked out for 3 hours prior.

We hired her in the winter time so we didn't notice anything

Any advice on how we can mention this to her without offending her

[Anonymous]

You can't. Not without offending her. You need to decide if this is a big enough of a deal to lose her over. If my employer told me I smelled, I would take it to heart and do something about it, but I'd be mortified and probably look for a new job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can't. Not without offending her. You need to decide if this is a big enough of a deal to lose her over. If my employer told me I smelled, I would take it to heart and do something about it, but I'd be mortified and probably look for a new job.

I agree with this, I sorry OP. The only potential out you may have is to sign your kid up for swimming lessons and hope she showers there. Or tell her she can take the kids to the gym foranhour if shewants to work out. Or offer your shower while the kids are napping.

[Anonymous]

Is there a way to tell anyone they smell without offending them? I don't think so.

Did she just work out before coming to work? You could offer to let her use the shower while the kids nap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is there a way to tell anyone they smell without offending them? I don't think so.

Did she just work out before coming to work? You could offer to let her use the shower while the kids nap.

I had an MB tell me once I smelled, granted I had just been running in the hot son with her kids all day, but still I decided to start wearing deodorant after that. I never knew I was smelly before, I'm glad someone told me. I stayed with them for 6 years total.

I'm not sure how I would take it if we had just started working together. You will have to judge your relationship with the nanny and her personality.

[Anonymous]

You could make comments when youre around her that could maybe indirectly give her a clue? Like every time she is near, say "what is that? And then search around for the offending odor? Maybe if you did it a few times it might make her check herself privately?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a way to tell anyone they smell without offending them? I don't think so.

Did she just work out before coming to work? You could offer to let her use the shower while the kids nap.

I had an MB tell me once I smelled, granted I had just been running in the hot son with her kids all day, but still I decided to start wearing deodorant after that. I never knew I was smelly before, I'm glad someone told me. I stayed with them for 6 years total.

I'm not sure how I would take it if we had just started working together. You will have to judge your relationship with the nanny and her personality.

You never wore deodorant before that?

OP, there isn't really a nice way to do it. Could you buy some moist towelettes and say something like "since you're out in this heat so much, I thought you'd appreciate these in case you have plans after work." ?
I'd want to know if I smelled, even if I was embarrassed at the time. Same as I want to know when I have food in my teeth, or marker on my face.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You could make comments when youre around her that could maybe indirectly give her a clue? Like every time she is near, say "what is that? And then search around for the offending odor? Maybe if you did it a few times it might make her check herself privately?

!! Please don't do this. Very passive aggressive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a way to tell anyone they smell without offending them? I don't think so.

Did she just work out before coming to work? You could offer to let her use the shower while the kids nap.

I had an MB tell me once I smelled, granted I had just been running in the hot son with her kids all day, but still I decided to start wearing deodorant after that. I never knew I was smelly before, I'm glad someone told me. I stayed with them for 6 years total.

I'm not sure how I would take it if we had just started working together. You will have to judge your relationship with the nanny and her personality.

You never wore deodorant before that?

OP, there isn't really a nice way to do it. Could you buy some moist towelettes and say something like "since you're out in this heat so much, I thought you'd appreciate these in case you have plans after work." ?
I'd want to know if I smelled, even if I was embarrassed at the time. Same as I want to know when I have food in my teeth, or marker on my face.

I'm OP's wife. I agree with the last part of this, which is why I want to say something. I would want someone to say something to me. She doesn't work out, so I know she hasn't been working out when she gets here. And, of course, as it gets hotter and hotter outside, the tendency is to get worse. I love her being active with my kids and it's always really bad right when they come back from being out all day. She's really young and hasn't had a lot of family guidance, so I know that plays a role. She's a really sweet girl and I would hate to hurt her feelings, but I think she needs and deserves to know. Also, I would hate her to go places after leaving my house smelling like that and go places where people may judge and/or make fun of her behind her back.
Knowing her personality, I honestly don't think she would quit over this, that doesn't worry me. But I still don't want to hurt her feelings and/or offend her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a way to tell anyone they smell without offending them? I don't think so.

Did she just work out before coming to work? You could offer to let her use the shower while the kids nap.

I had an MB tell me once I smelled, granted I had just been running in the hot son with her kids all day, but still I decided to start wearing deodorant after that. I never knew I was smelly before, I'm glad someone told me. I stayed with them for 6 years total.

I'm not sure how I would take it if we had just started working together. You will have to judge your relationship with the nanny and her personality.

You never wore deodorant before that?

OP, there isn't really a nice way to do it. Could you buy some moist towelettes and say something like "since you're out in this heat so much, I thought you'd appreciate these in case you have plans after work." ?
I'd want to know if I smelled, even if I was embarrassed at the time. Same as I want to know when I have food in my teeth, or marker on my face.

Correct, I had never worn deodorant at that time (I had tried it a couple times but it always gave me a rash). I don't know if I always smelled but no one ever said anything to me. So I decided it was time to find a deodorant that works so I tried all the natural brands until I finally found something that works but I have to import it from Germany, but it's worth it. So, on the topic at hand, I personally was glad someone told me I smelled. Your nanny might be in the same boat OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We really like our nanny but we have noticed recently that some days she has come to work smelling as if she has worked out for 3 hours prior.

We hired her in the winter time so we didn't notice anything

Any advice on how we can mention this to her without offending her

just start a conversation like this,I love people smell nice,fresh .

[Anonymous]

OP how long has your nanny been working for you? Has she smelled this whole time and you are now benching it up? Is she running around with a toddler all day to acquire her to smell? Normal people don't smell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP how long has your nanny been working for you? Has she smelled this whole time and you are now benching it up? Is she running around with a toddler all day to acquire her to smell? Normal people don't smell.

She started working for us around february. It was cold, so I didn't notice anything. Only now, as the weather gets warmer, I can actually smell it. It has been getting increasingly worse as the days get warmer. And yes, I do expect her to be sweaty after running after kids all day. And so am I when I do that. But I wear deodorant, so even after sweating I don't have a strong body odor. I would be happy to let her shower in my house and glad to buy deodorant for her if that will solve the problem. Most of the time, however, she gets here around 4pm and I can already smell it when I get home around 6. (She stays till 7 most days.)

[Anonymous]

I don't know if you can. How can you tell someone they smell without being offensive? I don't think you can.

The only thing I can say is you can offer her your shower of bathtub to use when your child is napping.

Besides, since she is the nanny and I am assuming you are not spending any significant time in her presence, unless your child complains, I would just grin and bear it for the few minutes that you have to deal with her.

[Anonymous]

Is it an afterschool job? How old are the kids? If the kids are between three and six, I think you can reasonably assume that at some point they will tell the nanny.