Vent: really, really want to fire our nanny; not worth it in these circumstances

[Anonymous]

She has been unreliable from a month into our relationship (almost a year now). We have come to many new agreements to try to make the schedule work better for her, and she showed up today asking for more time off. It is so hard to plan anything, never knowing when her next unavoidable conflict will be.

She uses PTO, or goes unpaid when it runs out, but rarely gives me enough notice to hire someone else. I also just finished cleaning the pans she used to cook her lunch (not the kids', I make that) so that I can use them to cook dinner.

She has her good points, which is why we've put up with it for so long, but I am finally at the end of my rope. We won't need a nanny at all for awhile after this summer, so there's no point in firing her now after all this time, but, ugh.

And before anyone asks, I followed all the advice on this forum regarding her pay and benefits package. It's good. She was great for the first month, and then became incapable of showing up for a full week's work more than a handful of times.

I feel better now, and less likely to say anything to her this evening.

[Anonymous]

Definitely fire her. In over two years my nanny has been late ONCE. If the playroom is a wreck when I come home because the kids and nanny are in there playing, the nanny will spend an extra 5 minutes of her own time putting everything away. She NEVER leaves a mess for me. Not once. She's also never asked to take more time off than what she's given (so, no unpaid time off).

[Anonymous]

I know you don't want to fire her, but a nanny is supposed to be reliable, and she is anything but. I'm sorry you got a bad egg.

[Anonymous]

I would at least search for an alternate summer nanny. Maybe a college student on break? That sounds exhausting.

[Anonymous]

Oh, I wish I had done that months ago. But I am not up to searching for and training someone new who might have her own issues for three more months. I'm sticking with the devil I know. At least the kids have fun with her.

[Anonymous]

I stuck with a job that was a disaster for too long because like you said, it's the devil you know. It didn't end well at all. I hope you have better luck next go around.

[Anonymous]

I understand why you don't want to put in the time and effort searching and screening a new nanny now.

Sorry you got such a bad apple.

She sounds like she is taking full advantage of your kindness and in the process is making all of us nannies look bad.

Trust me....The majority of us nannies are true professionals and would never think of leaving our dirty pans in the sink for you to wash.

[Anonymous]

I would not fire her but I would do a performance review and be clear that she will not have a positive reference unless something turns around. It may be enough to motivate her to make the last few months count.

[Anonymous]

Start looking for a new nanny, OP. I find lateness unforgivable as well as unreliability. Nannies are worth nothing unless they can be depended upon to be there to take care of the children.

I am a nanny and I have never been late - not once - not in any nanny job. In my current position of nearly a year, I have only asked for one morning off to attend a friend's funeral.

[Anonymous]

Thank you for the support, everyone. We have had a performance review just this week, hence my outsized anger at the behavior continuing just a couple of days later. Thinking calming thoughts ...

[Anonymous]

Your nanny will qualify for unemployment and you will be able to stop her from claiming

[Anonymous]

I'll fire her