My Au Pair was sent home. I feel depressed and sad.

[Anonymous]

I don't think it was my fault. Sweet kid, just very social and got caught up in the DC party scene.
Still sad, I really wanted this to work out for a year.

[Anonymous]

Sent home for what reason exactly?

[Anonymous]

She was arrested for an alcohol related offense. I blame myself.

[Anonymous]

Does this kind of stuff ever get to the press? This is devastating to you and your entire family stability. Why haven't we heard of this sort of thing before? I'm sure this can't be the first incidence. Thank you for posting.
I am sorry, OP.

[Anonymous]

she learned a valuable life lesson.

[Anonymous]

SO forgive me, I don't know anything about au pairs, but are they not allowed to get drunk and arrested? That is grounds for being deported???

My only experience with au pairs is having 3 when I was a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:SO forgive me, I don't know anything about au pairs, but are they not allowed to get drunk and arrested? That is grounds for being deported???

My only experience with au pairs is having 3 when I was a child.

well to the one PP, I don't think it newsworthy, but to the immediate PP, I think most agencies end your employment if you get arrested for certain offenses: DUIs, underage drinking, etc. certainly if they cannot drive legally, they are not much help to their family.

[Anonymous]

OP - can you give us more detail about the circumstances? why on earth would you feel responsible? did you serve her the alcohol?

[Anonymous]

Of course she was sent home. Really ANY non citizen who is found guilty of ANY crime (to include jaywalking!) should be deported immediately. We have enough criminals of our own in this country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - can you give us more detail about the circumstances? why on earth would you feel responsible? did you serve her the alcohol?

responsible is the wrong word, more sadness/regret. could I have been more strict, given more warnings? that sort of thing. but really, I think I did what I could and she made her own choices. still sucks though ....

[Anonymous]

Did she have a drinking problem?

[Anonymous]

hi OP, I'm sorry. I know that there is a crew of au pairs in the area that are very heavy partiers. many are not like this, but the ones I know of go out often and party VERY hard. I hope they didn't suck in your au pair. she made her choices, but the peer pressure can be tough. don't beat yourself up. use at as a lesson for your own children.
she probably feels terrible, keep in touch with her if you feel badly for her.

I'm guessing she might have been from South America, based on the crew I've bumped into, but I guess it doesn't matter now anyway.

[Anonymous]

I am also curious about this. If she can't drive anymore wouldn't the agency still try to rematch her with a non-driving family? Was this a situation where you wanted to keep the AP but the agency insisted that she has to go? What would that situation be?

[Anonymous]

I think the agencies have their own rules. so if the au pair violated that she violated with the agency.
for a reputable agency, they would have cause to send them home and should.
would you want a rematched au pair or any at all with a record? no.

even if she's a sweet girl and it was after hours, it can't happen that she could stay.
she had bad luck it seems. I am scared seeing some of the raving that the au pairs I know have done. I mean out ALL night. the parents have to know.
again, not all of them, a select few, but they are playing with fire.
I worry about date rape, car wrecks anything. please host moms, talk to your au pairs and make sure they are keeping safe. they can go out and have fun, but they need to be smart about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:hi OP, I'm sorry. I know that there is a crew of au pairs in the area that are very heavy partiers. many are not like this, but the ones I know of go out often and party VERY hard. I hope they didn't suck in your au pair. she made her choices, but the peer pressure can be tough. don't beat yourself up. use at as a lesson for your own children.
she probably feels terrible, keep in touch with her if you feel badly for her.

I'm guessing she might have been from South America, based on the crew I've bumped into, but I guess it doesn't matter now anyway.

Why would you think that she was from South America. The au pairs that I have had from Brazil are all over 21 and barely drank or didn't drink at all.