HELP - how do you fire a live in nanny
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Anonymous
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Unfortunately, ours needs to go. She not a horrible person, but is absolutely NOT a good fit for our family. I really don't want her watching our baby after we fire her (and we don't mind paying some severance to be fair), but how long do we give her to move out?
The down side of a live in is that this is such an awkward situation! Anyone have advice??? Thanks in advance! |
Anonymous
| What is the problem? |
Anonymous
| Unfortunately you're going to HAVE to give her notice and time to find a new place to live. You can have a new nanny start as a live-out while your old nanny is still living there but I think that'd be SUPER awkward. |
Anonymous
| the problem is that she is just not a good fit. I like to work from home sometimes, she does not seem to understand that this means don't talk to me....she does the absolute minimum - seems annoyed if I want help getting out the door in the morning. We are not a particularly demanding family (we have some one else who cleans, I do not work long hours). Just not a good fit. |
Anonymous
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Four weeks notice to move seems fair to me. Less than that might be a serious hardship for her, as it would be for me.
You could give her two weeks notice of job termination (meaning you're going to pay her for those two weeks whether she works or not) plus two additional weeks to find a new job/living space which would be unpaid. Or you could give her all four weeks notice paid (some nanny contracts specify a one month notice/severance). Or I'm sure there are several other variations. Finally, have you spoken to her about your concerns? As with any employee, a nanny will need to be managed to some degree. More experienced nannies should need less management, but every family is different and what she's used to might not work for your family (for instance I have no idea what "needing a little help getting out the door" means for you and would need you to be clear about how I could help without being in the way). Really, you just want to be as clear and direct with your employees as you'd want your boss to be with you ("Jenny, it is so nice to see you and Gabby playing/to hear about your weekend/to get to know you better, but when I work from home it's important that I have 8 hours of uninterrupted time to focus on my assignments. I look forward to catching up with you this evening but now I'm going to go up to my office/put on some headphones/get back to work." "Maeve, you've probably noticed that my mornings are a little rushed around here. What would be great for me is if you could take Dave and get his breakfast started while I'm finishing up in the bedroom/could help me look for my cellphone while I make my coffee/could set aside a special morning activity to entice the kids to detach from my legs!"). If you've already tried to address her issues I apologize, and perhaps it is just a personality combo that doesn't mesh - I just can't read a post like this without saying something. If she hasn't been neglectful, rude, failed to perform her duties, disobeyed direct instructions, etc. I think she probably deserves at least one formal warning before termination. |
Anonymous
| Does she have somewhere else to go? Parents house? Friends house if so 24 hrs seems fine and maybe a plane ticket if they are far away. |
Anonymous
| OP has a big problem. There's more to this story. |
Anonymous
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OP here - we have talked to her. There is no horrible problem (ie nothing urgent that makes me not want to leave her with the baby). She just is some one who we don't want to live with for the next five years. Bottom line is that we find her to be both annoying and lazy.
The poster who suggested 4 weeks notice seems about right . . . I feel very bad terminating her, but I have NO desire to live with her for the next five years. |
Anonymous
| Just tell her you are pretty sure she'd agree with you and DH that this just isn't a good fit and isnt' working out, and as such, you're giving her notice today that she needs to move out by May 15. |
Anonymous
| make sure you find out what (if any) landlord/tenant laws may apply here as well. you don't want to get nailed for missing some random tenancy law. |
Anonymous
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I think it all depends on if she has a back-up living situation in place. If so, two weeks notice would be sufficient.
If not, then depending on your state, you would have to give her the minimum required notice for rental leasing I would assume. In CA where I reside, it is sixty days. I understand it is not a good match, and I see your point of not wanting her to watch your child after you fire her. Also, I wouldn't want her living in my home as well since she might take it out on your house or try to steal something. Be careful. In order to keep things civil and get rid of her quicker, you may just have to pay her off. |
Anonymous
We live in CA and the nanny agency said 2 weeks notice was fine. No severance required. |
Anonymous
We all know severance is not a legal requirement, but I don't believe an agency would recommend against it under these circumstances. What exactly did they tell you? |