Evening help with dinner?

[Anonymous]

I have an amazing nanny who I am thrilled with. Both DH and I work high stress jobs and she has made our lives possible -- she works just during the day but takes care of so much with the kids -- shopping, hair cuts, and dropoffs that we have more time to focus on the kids during our limited time.

DH has a chronic medical issue that has long been in remission but I think has returned. He should still be able to work but is likely to be too tired to do much else, and he is generally 50% of what we do around the house, if not more. I was thinking about hiring someone to help out with dinner -- prep, cleanup, etc in the evenings so I can focus on the kids and then my work after they go to bed.

I'd consider a live in if things really got bad but I really don't want to leave our nanny who is amazing, and my kids love her and deserve the continuity.

Has anyone found someone to do this in the evenings? How did you find them (we found our nanny through a nanny agency, but that doesn't seem necessarily right for this job) How was your experience? And how much should I expect to pay? I know this isn't a nanny per se, but I am hoping someone on this board might have some experience in this area.

[Anonymous]

What sort of hours are you looking for?

[Anonymous]

Why don't you ask her to see if she is willing to help for an extra hour or two given the situation? Maybe she can help with meal prep or you can get a delivery service to deliver pre made meals, etc. Just use paper plates. Or maybe a high school or college kid who enjoys cooking.

[Anonymous]

I agree with 13:50 - maybe start by talking to your nanny and telling her what you're considering. She might be willing to take on a bit (perhaps meals) or she might know someone who would. You could talk w/ her about which things on her plate currently could perhaps be handled differently - grocery delivery instead of shopping for instance. Or even hiring a "mommy's helper" for a couple of afternoons if the nanny is willing to expand her role.

Obviously she might well say no - that she prefers to stick with the conventional nanny position as it is - but it's worth a conversation.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with 13:50 - maybe start by talking to your nanny and telling her what you're considering. She might be willing to take on a bit (perhaps meals) or she might know someone who would. You could talk w/ her about which things on her plate currently could perhaps be handled differently - grocery delivery instead of shopping for instance. Or even hiring a "mommy's helper" for a couple of afternoons if the nanny is willing to expand her role.

Obviously she might well say no - that she prefers to stick with the conventional nanny position as it is - but it's worth a conversation.

Good luck.

This exactly.

[Anonymous]

I would get a second helper (sitter/nanny/student) for the evening shift. One thing I've learned in two decades of running a household with children is not to put all your eggs in one basket. You don't want to burn your nanny out. Also, she will need to go on vacation, occasionally get sick, and have to attend other appointments and life events. If she should leave your employ, you will also have another person your children will already be familiar with. I would ask other parents and colleagues, as well as your nanny, for referrals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would get a second helper (sitter/nanny/student) for the evening shift. One thing I've learned in two decades of running a household with children is not to put all your eggs in one basket. You don't want to burn your nanny out. Also, she will need to go on vacation, occasionally get sick, and have to attend other appointments and life events. If she should leave your employ, you will also have another person your children will already be familiar with. I would ask other parents and colleagues, as well as your nanny, for referrals.

Op here.
I specifically do not want to ask my nanny for extra help - this is not a childcare job per se, it would be an extra 2 hours 4-5 days a week extra which is too much to ask for someone with a family of her own and this situation is looking like it may last a long time, a year or more. Our nanny is totally amazing but she doesn't want a 50-60 hour position. I was posting to see if someone else has done hired a helper like this and how to find them.

[Anonymous]

youcan try the usual sitter sites and post specifically what you're looking for. there's probably someone out there looking for just this type of thing. or is there a college or trade school with a culinary arts program? maybe a student there would like to get some hands on experience to add being a private chef to their resume? Just a thought. then there are dinner delivery services like blue apron.and in my area there are services where you go to a certified kitchen andassemble ingredients for a bunch of dinners and then freeze and assembleand com when ready. it's called dream dinners and three might be something similar in your area.

[Anonymous]

Our college nanny prepares dinner for the kids, but not for the whole family. I really you would have to pay more and do you really think the typical college student knows how to cook well? How many hours will you guarantee per week?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would get a second helper (sitter/nanny/student) for the evening shift. One thing I've learned in two decades of running a household with children is not to put all your eggs in one basket. You don't want to burn your nanny out. Also, she will need to go on vacation, occasionally get sick, and have to attend other appointments and life events. If she should leave your employ, you will also have another person your children will already be familiar with. I would ask other parents and colleagues, as well as your nanny, for referrals.

Op here.
I specifically do not want to ask my nanny for extra help - this is not a childcare job per se, it would be an extra 2 hours 4-5 days a week extra which is too much to ask for someone with a family of her own and this situation is looking like it may last a long time, a year or more. Our nanny is totally amazing but she doesn't want a 50-60 hour position. I was posting to see if someone else has done hired a helper like this and how to find them.

Just do a meal delivery program. It'll cost less and you can avoid the hassle of employing another person.

[Anonymous]

Can you just have a working menu of crockpot/one dish meals that nanny or you prepares during the day and then one of you just has to tend to or pop in the oven before meal time? Can your husband help by throwing a bag salad together very quickly when he gets home? Can your kids help with dishes (my 2 year old charges can take their plates to the sink and help load the dishwasher)?
You really just need help with meal prep and this is easily something that could be accomplished with a little planning and teamwork by your family and your nanny...no need to hire additional outside help.

[Anonymous]

OP, how old are your children?

[Anonymous]

Why do people view cooking dinner as something beneath the typical American nanny? I'm not from the US so I think it must be a cultural issue. I'm pretty sure a Latin American nanny looking to pick up some extra hours would be delighted to cook for you. In fact if you found a Peruvian or Mexican woman I bet you'd be eating very very well. I bet if you post on care.com you'll find lots of takers.

[Anonymous]

We had the same issue our first year with twins. I posted the job on 'gigs' in craigslist, and found a really fantastic single mom who usually worked as a house cleaner, but also really loved cooking. She would bring her perfect 4 year old who would play with our older child. I would recommend that you state an end date, or have a 6 mos contract, as we no longer needed her after the first year and we were not sure how to tell her. Thankfully she got a full time job before we had to bring it up! BTW for 2 hours it was $25 per day. She would cook, clean the kitchen, leave the dinner out for us, and then leave. So we just had to wash the dinner dishes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do people view cooking dinner as something beneath the typical American nanny? I'm not from the US so I think it must be a cultural issue. I'm pretty sure a Latin American nanny looking to pick up some extra hours would be delighted to cook for you. In fact if you found a Peruvian or Mexican woman I bet you'd be eating very very well. I bet if you post on care.com you'll find lots of takers.

Nannies take careof children. Cooks cook dinner for lazy parents.