Charged with preventing charge's accidents

[Anonymous]

I am a nanny for a very energetic 5 year old boy. I've been with the family for less than 3 months and, in this time, he has only hurt himself maybe 4 times while in my care (normal scrapes and bruises). He's come home from kindergarten with at least as many owwies from the playground in the same span of time.

MB has a communication style I'm not used to. In point, there's barely any communication at all. I attribute it to us both being very introverted people. Anyway, I got the sense when I started here that the children were a bit over-protected. Well today after letting her know about a spill my charge took whilst silly-dancing in that rubber legged way only 5 year olds can truly master (he'd scraped his elbow and knee but wasn't bleeding), she informed me in no subtle terms that he has been getting injured very frequently and I should make him move more slowly.

It's causing me a good bit of stress. I never let him out of my sight for more than a moment and can't possibly do more to prevent his injuries unless I literally sit on him all day. I know before they hired me the grandmother was the babysitter, so perhaps they are used to her bearing down on him and keeping a very slow pace.. but after all, he takes karate and is much less supervised on the school playground than in my care. Still, I don't know how to handle these expectations. I replied that I'd do my best, but he has a lot of energy.. trying to keep the conversation light-hearted, but it was all very serious for her.

[Anonymous]

Ask her if she wants to keep him in the house all day. Get specifics from her.

[Anonymous]

Yes, ask for specific routines she would like established so that her son doesn't get hurt. Like, always hold his hand? Do not allow him to climb the stairs unassisted? Remove any and all sharp objects from the house? Don't allow running?

This is ridiculous, btw. Of course he shouldn't go on monkey bars with a sword in one hand and an ice cream in the other, but your MB seems a bit too overprotective. He's a five-year-old kid! My kid scratched her tummy on her toy suitcase yesterday. Is that a reason to throw away the suitcase and never let her do anything? She cried, I kissed it better, we had a quick word about being careful and she is still alive.

[Anonymous]

I'm sure there is more to the story. Could you ask you MB to come on DCUM and post her side?

[Anonymous]

You need to have quick reflexes. For example, when a toddler starts falling, I move quickly to shove my hand between the sidewalk and their face. Thus, their face lands in the palm of my hand. It's all about the reflexes.

[Anonymous]

OP here. My reflexes are up to snuff, I'm actually used to caring for toddlers. A 5 year old who runs around like crazy is very different from a wobbly baby- he doesn't exactly stay right next to me. I feel I'm handling things as well as anyone could expect. I sooth him if he's crying, if he breaks the skin I apply ointment and a bandaid, I talk to him about being safe and always remind him to walk on the stairs. I just wanted to know if anyone else thought this was a bit ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. My reflexes are up to snuff, I'm actually used to caring for toddlers. A 5 year old who runs around like crazy is very different from a wobbly baby- he doesn't exactly stay right next to me. I feel I'm handling things as well as anyone could expect. I sooth him if he's crying, if he breaks the skin I apply ointment and a bandaid, I talk to him about being safe and always remind him to walk on the stairs. I just wanted to know if anyone else thought this was a bit ridiculous.

I think it's a little crazy. Kids get hurt. As long as the injuries are scrapes and not broken bones, it seems she is overreacting a bit. Ask what they would like you to do to help prevent booboos and explain what you've been doing.

I know of a daycare that calls CPS after three booboos. THREE!

[Anonymous]

Of course it's ridiculous. You're going to be stressed out and uncomfortable unless you have another conversation with her. If you are both quiet people, neither one of you may be comfortable starting the conversation, but you have to do it.

[Anonymous]

But if the kid keeps getting hurt.... maybe you should change strategies. Become more than an active watcher. Take him to playgrounds that are more contained. Bring balls or games with you so he will have something to do other than "dancing in that rubber legged way"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But if the kid keeps getting hurt.... maybe you should change strategies. Become more than an active watcher. Take him to playgrounds that are more contained. Bring balls or games with you so he will have something to do other than "dancing in that rubber legged way"

This is how bratty, whimpy kids-boy or girl- are made, by hovering over, structuring everything they are doing and by coddling them when they do get a "booboo". He is 5! He should be running like a maniac and bruising himself, skinning his knees etc. we are not talking major head injuries here. Ridiculous!
OP, can you talk to DB or a teacher about approaching MB? She needs to chill out but you shouldn't be the one to tell her so. You are doing nothing wrong here, so don't listen to those who would try to say otherwise.

[Anonymous]

OP the mother probably compares the injuries he receives while being with you to when she's home or when he is at school or with his grandmother. If he's getting twice as many "booboos" with you than that may be cause for concern.

Something to think about.

[Anonymous]

He's 5 for crying out loud.

Scrapes, bumps, and bruises should be his norm.

They were mine around that age when I was jumping off furniture, doing gymnastic stunts on the monkey bars, running round the playground/yard/house with my 4 brothers and sisters, etc. Ah, the good ol' days.

Hopefully you can find a respectful way to make your MB stop overreacting! Good luck!