Annoyed!

[Anonymous]

So I have been with this family for 8 months. We have a great relationship and I am generally happy in my position. Lately though I feel like I am being a bit taken advantage of.

I agreed to work today so MB and DB could go to a wedding. I come in at my designated time and MB tells me DB will not be attending. So he decides instead of taking care of his children on one of the only two days he sees them, he watches me do it. He is currently in the other family room watching college football. I normally do not work Saturdays because it is the only day I can spend time with my fiancé. I get that I agreed to work, but if I had known he would be doing this, I would have declined.

To make matters worse I asked of he had any idea what time I would be getting relieved, and he said he has no idea. MB and DB have been making a little habit out of just singing my end time. I am seriously getting annoyed. What do you guys think
I should do? I know it's not a huuuuge deal but it's like I have a life too, ya know?

[Anonymous]

Just winging my end time*

[Anonymous]

The kids have just fallen asleep and I'm finished with all my duties by the way..

[Anonymous]

When asked to work extra hours, you should decide if you want the extra hours or not. Do you want the extra $$$ enough to give up your free time? If you do this instead of judging whether or not your bosses' pursuits justify outsourcing childcare, you will be much happier.

[Anonymous]

I don't think you understood the question PP, but thanks..

[Anonymous]

Where did I even day I asked for more hours? Mb approached me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think you understood the question PP, but thanks..

A) Don't be a bitch; PP gave a perfectly reasonable and on-topic response
B) Don't be a pushover; as stated, YOU set the terms and expectations. If you prefer not to work weekends, you can decline. If you want a firm end time, say so! If they ask you to sit on a Saturday, tell them "I am free from 10-3." If those hours don't work for them, they can get a different sitter. Also, if you have agreed in advance on a given end time then you don't have to ask--you can just say, "Hey, wanted to remind you that I am leaving at 3." If they don't relieve you on time after that, then you have a different probem, but right now you aren't setting clear boundaries and expectations and then complaining about it on the internet--not productive.

[Anonymous]

MB here. I can see why it seems ridiculous that you're being paid to be there when the father is home, but there have been occasions when I have done this same thing.

If you accepted the job and they're paying you well then I don't think you have much recourse (unless you want to ask if you can leave now since the kids are asleep.)

It may very well be that the mother wants you there for her own peace of mind. I (unfortunately) can envision a scenario where a mom might feel better having their nanny on duty, even if the husband is home.

Basically though I think that you accepted the job. Beyond that it isn't appropriate for you to judge WHY they need you. Perhaps they also didn't want to cancel on you at the last minute once their plans had changed or something.

Just my two cents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MB here. I can see why it seems ridiculous that you're being paid to be there when the father is home, but there have been occasions when I have done this same thing.

If you accepted the job and they're paying you well then I don't think you have much recourse (unless you want to ask if you can leave now since the kids are asleep.)

It may very well be that the mother wants you there for her own peace of mind. I (unfortunately) can envision a scenario where a mom might feel better having their nanny on duty, even if the husband is home.

Basically though I think that you accepted the job. Beyond that it isn't appropriate for you to judge WHY they need you. Perhaps they also didn't want to cancel on you at the last minute once their plans had changed or something.

Just my two cents.

+1
Maybe DB feels a cold coming on and wanted to stay in.

[Anonymous]

PP, thank you for the thoughtful response. You made some really good points. I still find it a little rude, for lack of a better word, especially since the babies were crying for him. I was distracting them, but they just wanted their dad. It was almost as if they were being ignored, which I guess hurt and frustrated me. I also suppose I could be more firm with my end time, any tips?

[Anonymous]

Oh didn't see that, thanks 19:19 I will try to be more clear. Don't know why you called me a bitch though. Kinda uncalled for. Oh well, that reflects you, not me. Thanks again guys!

[Anonymous]

The response was rude and not helpful at all, that's all.

[Anonymous]

Just decline. Say you have other plans.

Also, you aren't being taken advantage of. You are being paid to do a job you accepted. You didn't like the conditions when you arrived. No problem, lesson learned. Stop with the victim language, though. It makes you sound immature, which, I'm sure, is not how you want to present yourself.

Next time, weigh the value of your free time against the pay check and act accordingly, without the complaining.

[Anonymous]

You call it victim language, I thought it was just venting on an anonymous forum, my bad. You know what else is immature? Bullying people on the internet. Like that "victim language"!?

[Anonymous]

Why are people soo rude

I have been there myself and it sucks. OP has every right to be annoyed.

God people get a life.