Morning Routine Problems
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Anonymous
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I started a before school nanny position 4 weeks ago for two kids, 6 and 8 and almost everyday seems to be a struggle to get out of the door. Initially parent asked that I wake the kids at 6:30 and leave by 7am (I know, I know, very little time) but that never happened once and so I decided that ideally if I wake up the kids at 6:20, and leave by 7:15, that should be enough time to get ready. For the past 2 weeks, mom didn't go to work until after I left the house to drop off kids to school, so she has been helping out with getting the kids going on the morning, though we would leave between 7:15-7:30 usually.
Today, she left before the kids woke up, and while it's hard at times to get both of them going, my main issue is with the 6 year old. It literally takes between 5-10 minutes before he decides to come downstairs even though I'm right by his bed repeatedly telling him to get up for the day. Then he literally takes 20-30 minutes just to put on shirt, pants, belt, shoes and socks. I will repeatedly tell him to get dressed and he will just ignore me and sit there or start to take off his shirt and stop, etc. I then get frustrated and raise my voice, and he cries and asks why I'm being mean to him, then I have to calm him down then again try to get him dresses...ugh. He also sometimes refuses what is for breakfast even though mom gives me the meal plan on Sundays after checking with kids. He tends to eat very slow as well and is easily distracted, and is slow to brush his teeth and wash face too. For the first time, they were tardy today and I feel horrible because I know I need to try to do something better. I just don't know what to do?? They go to bed at a reasonable time (8-8:30 pm). I try everyday to speak to him calmly but that never works so then I have to raise my voice but I'm still struggling. It's not like I've never had a morning position before. I had a 5 year position previously for before school care and the kids were initially 5 and 8; it was never this stressful in the morning with them. I don't want to put him in time-out because that will just slow down the process even more. Mom knows that 6 year old is like this and has previously talked to both kids about the morning routine but that doesn't seem to be helping. I called her after dropping off kids to tell her they were tardy and she told me she will speak to 6 year old again and next time to call her during the routine so she can talk to him. While I appreciate that, I know it's not her job to try to get the kids doing what they need to do but mine. Any advice or tips would be great. |
Anonymous
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I've used a clock with hands for kids before - I put stickers on the clock - when the hand gets to 7:00, you need to be dressed, when it gets to 7:05, teeth, hair etc. needs to be done. Together we are racing against the clock - becomes more of a game.... With time for something fun - maybe a hot chocolate on he way to school if we can pull it off?
It helps if I am super organized before trying to involve the kids in getting ready. I'd make sure you have everything possible done before you wake him, so you just need to help him get dressed, then teeth, hair, face and you can walk out the door. Another option would be to change the routine - I prefer to do breakfast first. It sounds like he is having a hard time waking up and getting moving. What if you just woke him and told him he needed to be down at the table in 2 minutes, then go up and remind him, 2 minutes are up, time to come down. He may have an easier time getting going after eating and waking up at the table a bit. Good luck! |
Anonymous
| Try and make it a game. A race to get dressed where he tries to beat a timer, for example. |
Anonymous
| The kid is just not a morning person. He may need a little sugar to get going. Can you bring him a glass of juice when you wake him? |
Anonymous
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What I do with my charges is wake them up, then sit and read one short poem from a book we are working through (just normal adult poetry anthology). It gives them a minute where they don't have to do anything but lay there, but there is a finite end: end of poem=get up.
I usually get them out of bed by picking them up and giving them a big hug, then set them on their feet and pull their shirt over their head and their pants down, then they step out of their clothes and I hand them the pjs and walk them to the bathroom to put clothes in the hamper and pee. By this point it's been 5 minutes or less and both kids are awake, out of bed, undressed and either sitting on the toilet or sitting waiting for a turn. While they go to the bathroom I grab their clothes and lay them out on the floor right side up. They dressed and brush hair and teeth and 20 minutes after waking up we walk downstairs for breakfast. They are pretty motivated for their part in all this because we have a built in time to read a story before leaving (a chapter book that we read one chapter of) and if they are too slow they lose that reading time. |
Anonymous
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After school one day ask him how much time he thinks he needs? Would he like to sleep 10 mins more and then dress quickly or would get like to get up earlier and feel more relaxed.
He might be stalling because he knows he has the time and hes doing it to annoy you. I did this with a 7 yo and he said he would rather sleep and then get dressed quickly. I used an alarm clock too. When it goes off, he has to get out of bed, Put it on the other side of the room so he has to get up and turn it off. |
Anonymous
That's it. Teach a child to use a drug to start their day. |
Anonymous
LOL yeah OJ's the hard stuff |
Anonymous
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I would try and put something fun in place for the last 5mins-reading of a book, quick game etc. If they're slow they miss out
Also, I would give a specific time that breakfast starts and finishes. i.e if you wake them 6:20, I would say breakfast starts at 6:40 and finishes at 7. If they choose to take their time getting dressed and don't start breakfast til 6:50 then they only have 10mins to eat and breakfast still finishes after that 10mins regardless of how much they have eaten |
Anonymous
| If you need to, have him eat in the car.... |
Anonymous
| Tell the parents these kids need to go to bed earlier. |
Anonymous
Your a prune. It's juice. I bet you wake up each morning and drink a coffee or tea, hypocrite! |
Anonymous
Uh, but the point is we know it isn't healthy to need coffee every morning, so why would we teach bad habits to children who are still a blank slate and could train their bodies in other ways (i.e. without the need for stimulants like sugar or caffeine)? |
Anonymous
Okay first: a prune is a fruit. I assume you mean prude. Second: Prude = One who is excessively concerned with being or appearing to be proper, modest, or righteous. I know you think you're 'cool' and 'hip' using your fancy words, but at least use them correctly. Sheesh. |
Anonymous
If we're gonna "Teach a child to use a drug", just go ahead and give him a red bull each morning. If OJ is so bad, I best check myself into rehab quick! I've drank a glass every morning for the past thirteen years. |