Lying about sick children.
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Anonymous
| I work part-time for a SAHM with three young children. My agreement is a little bit different from most, I don't care or work with sick children for several reasons. One being I am a full time student, and the other is that I have a family member who has a suppressed immune system. I made it very clear when interviewing. MB/DB agreed, and said it would be easy since she stays at home most of the time. I know it's not optimal for most families, but it's what was agreed upon. I don't mind when the kids have a cold, ear infection ect...but something really contagious like strep, flu, stomach virus I just can't risk. I usually come in around 6, and stay the night to help care for the infant. I can get paid and get sleep, it's a great arrangement. I just get the kids ready for bed, and then the rest of the night I sleep and get up with the baby when I need to. I came in Thursday and MB left saying she had to go on some errands, and then not 30 minutes passed and the two-year-old was throwing up. The 4-year-old tell me he's been sick all day, and she never told me! I called MB and she said it was just something he ate, but he was running a low grade fever. I was pretty upset, mostly because she never told me he had been sick. She arrived home after they had gone to bed. She asked me to stay, since she was going to be up with the two-year-old and I agreed since I've already been exposed. Of course the 4-year-old started getting sick around midnight, it was obviously a stomach flu. I know shit happens, and I feel bad. However, it was agreed by all parties that I did not work with sick children. I really rather her find someone else, then lie and break our agreement. It put me in a bad position this weekend, I can't go home so I have to stay at MB house as to not expose my family member. Should I bring it up, or just cast it off as a one time event? |
Anonymous
| I'm so sorry this happened to you! You need to make it clear to MB that she can not do this again. It was unprofessional and more than rude to put you in a situation where you had no choice. And don't feel bad about not being able to help, plenty of parents stay awake with their sick children without needing to pay someone else to be there. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| While what happened sucks, you need to find a job where you can work in a sterile environment. Kids are contagious often before symptoms even show up. |
Anonymous
|
OP, it just is not realistic to think you can work in childcare without being exposed to a zillion bugs. Stomach flu can come on with no warning. And PP is correct that with many ailments, the infectious period precedes the onset of symptoms.
Sounds like you got a bad break this time, but it is entirely possible that the mother thought it was a food reaction until it spread to the 4 year old. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
+2 |
Anonymous
I agree with this also. |
Anonymous
And me. |
Anonymous
|
The point is she did not relay any message about the 2 year old being sick for most of the day. There is no reason any mother would not tell their nanny that a child has been sick all day, unless she was hoping to conceal it and have the nanny still come in to work. I have had agreements with parents as well for no care with contagious illnesses because I had an infant. I had a family not say a word until I came to work while MD, DB, and baby were all sick with stomach flew, every bathroom in the home was contaminated as you can imagine. It was intentional, in my case, and I suspect it is the same for the OP. Even if I had a nanny who cared for sick children I would most definitely tell her about the child's illness before leaving the home. That's just common sense.
OP you need to have a conversation with the family, and make your future expectations clear. I almost exclusively work with preemies now, if I showed up to work with any hints of an illness I would most definitely be fired for disregarding the child's health. The OPs MB disregarded the health of herself, and her family when she did not disclose this until OP was already exposed. |
Anonymous
| Sorry *flu not flew |
Anonymous
| Regardless, you and MB are clearly not on the same page. I agree that you should consider another type of work. |
Anonymous
Agree with this. What your MB did may have been purposeful/or not, but illnesses and bugs are a reality of working with children. You could make clear again to your MB why its important you be notified when the children are ill, and that it is a deal breaker, if it happens again she will receive your notice. She will either be more cautious next time, tell you it won't work for them, or she'll do it again and you should be prepared to follow through. |
Anonymous
| It was selfish of her to pretty much lie for her own convience. You'll probably let her get away with it and she'll continue so why bother asking. |
Anonymous
| OP, I am sorry this happened to you. I think if you do insist on being a nanny who does not take care of sick children, you should find a family with fewer kids. Between 3 kids, someone is going to have a cough, low grade fever, loose stools (which is not the same as diarrhea), etc close to half the time. |