Nanny here, but asking advice for my nephew. He is 2.5 years old and I love him to bits, but compared to other 2 years olds I provide care for, I really feel that he is behind. He is VERY energetic and always on the go. While he initally will want to be read to, he quickly loses interest and same with puzzles, learning type toys, educational kids' shows, cards and games, etc. He prefers active play or listening to music on mom's Ipad (yes, he knows how to use it and I know that that is not good). My sibling put several great learning apps on it and he does the same - gets interested at first then stops. He doesn't recognize colors properly or numbers and the alphabet. I hate that I do this, but I can't stop comparing him to other kids his age who know so much more than him. I am worried. Any tips? |
Do his parents want your help? |
Yes, they have asked for advice. His first cousin who is just 3 days apart from him and lives with him knows so much more and so there is definitely an obvious difference. |
The first thing I'd do, is cut out all screen time. I hate to admit it, but it's the #1 dumbing influence in a kid's life. Would they do that? A kid needs an opportunity to get "bored". |
I'm interested in what people recommend here. I don't think knowing how to use an iPad is a problem, fwiw, because I nanny for a 14 month old who is similarly "busy," unable to stay focused on any task for more than a moment (and obv he has zero screens of any kind) - will be watching to see what ideas people share for improving toddler concentration! |
Research Jane Healy, PhD. She explains how the wiring of a young child's brain gets damaged by screen time. Most people have no clue. |
I think this is worth a trip to the child's Doctor just to rule out ADHD - plus the doctor may have some suggestions/ ideas about what is happening |
First, stop comparing. All kids develop at different rates. Individual children can also have uneven development. It sounds like your nephew has great gross motor development and is also interested in developing his musical interest/skills. Use this as a basis for his activities.
Use colored bean bags in his play...throwing, balancing on head, handing him one and asking him to run to the matching one across the room...all the while saying the colors as you play You can do similar gross motor activities with numbers and letters. Hop to a certain number or letter (either on a sidewalk with chalk or indoors on poster board numbers/letters), race to the number/letter/color called out, race a car to a certain number/letter/color. Take walks and talk about things you see of various colors, transitioning to turning it into an "I Spy" game while walking. Another thing...he's 2.5. Many children don't recognize their letters or numbers until they get to preschool. It isn't anything to worry about at this point. I've known some children who won't sit for books until close to 4 or even beyond. Make book reading interactive if it isn't so already. He doesn't sound like he's developmentally ready for a book that is straight up listening. Choose really short books that have flaps or textures. You could also use short, toddler books with animals or colors and incorporate a game with it. As you read a page ask him to go find something of the same color or do the animal movement or sound. |
The colored bean bags is exactly the sort of suggestion I was going to make.
Work on colors that way. "Thomas, run to get me 1 red bean bag" "Now hop to get me 2 green bean bags" an energetic way of counting and learning colors. Also, at that age...sometimes he'll want to learn, sometimes he won't. (Isn't that every age?) ![]() If he has a lot of toys out in the room, it could be overwhelming him. Bins and boxes to put some of the toys out of sight could be very helpful. |
My 2.5 year old could focus longer on books, activities and such and didn't have access to an Ipad or anything, but he also didn't know all his colors yet, alphabet or numbers. A ton of kids I know wont sit for books at all. Doesn't mean that they are not learning. A lot of boys learn through active play and that's what your sister should be encouraging. I don't think that he is actually "behind." |
As far as the book reading, I have tried almost all of the above and it's a no go. Yes, I am absolutely aware that I shouldn't compare, but that is also helping me realize that I do want to give him different avenues to learn. Thanks, those are great ideas. |
Hello! Former daycare worker in the 2 year old room, former preschool teacher, and current nanny to two toddlers here! Maybe I can help a bit? 2.5 years is still really young to sit down and sit still. It was almost impossible to get preschoolers at the 3-5 year range to sit down for more than 5 minutes at circle time, let alone a 2 year old! I wouldn't worry about his attention span quite yet unless its really affecting getting everyday tasks done. To the person that suggested getting him tested for ADHD, I very strongly have to disagree. He's barely 3! Of course he is going to have loads of energy. Only in extreme cases would I suggest getting tested this early. Extremes being : never listening, opposition with most things, and not being able to find pleasure with any tasks (seems like he enjoys the iPad). As for learning, the number one way preschool children learn is through play. So just try to have fun. Maybe pick out a topic for the week. Say you choose Rain as the topic. Go to the library if you can and let him pick out a book about rain, learn some songs online about rain and sing them through out the week, make some rain art (paint some raindrops)and explain a couple facts about it while working on it together. Make it easy and fun, free of pressure. Let him have creative control and I'm sure that will help a lot. You can look up preschool lesson plans online regarding most subjects. Keep it simple! As simple as one week being a "triangle" theme if you want it to be a math week. Also, have fun!! Good luck! |
He is much too young to be evaluated for ADHD. |
He sounds like a normal kid to me. Sorry...nothing to fix. |
I was goig to make similar suggestions. Stop viewing it as learning OR gross motor. He should be doing both simultaneously, duh!
Reading books is not the ideal way to teach pre-reading skills or love of language, so stop fixating on that. Pick a letter of the day and look for it everywhere--spot it on signs, comment when you use/wear/eat an item starting with that letter, draw pictures of it in any medium available, play word games by thinking of words that start with the letter. Speaking of which--play word games generally. He doesn't like books? Fine. YOU read and memorize poems and nursery rhymes and song lyrics (especially action songs) and sing and talk with him all day. When you are playing, start to play rhyming games. "My teddy is taking a nap. Then he will sit on my lap. I hope he doesn't give me a slap!" Use and savor language daily and you will be amazed at how his interest in language improves. Another non-obvious pre-reading skill is symbolic thinking/play. When he picks up a block and pretends it's a cell phone, he is preparing his brain to understand that a certain image can symbolize a phoneme. Encourage this type of play and let him enjoy it without pulling him away for something more "educational." His gross and fin motor skills are just as important as mental capacity, because he will learn to read as he learns to write, and he won't be able to do either if he doesn't have skills like a strong pincer grasp, experience with tasks that cross the centerline of the body, etc. Know that water play, fingerpainting, playing in a sandbox are pre-writing skills. Stop focusing on the learning milestones you expect and start building up the boy you have in front of you. |