Was it weird of me to ask for a raise?

[Anonymous]

I have worked for my current family for a year and 3 months. I was expecting a raise after a year since my duties have dramatically changed. She was 3 months old when I started and basically sleeping and eating all day. Now she's a rambunctious little girl that's running all over the place. I now have to cook her 3 meals, clean up after her constantly and keep her busy all day. She is not an "easy" toddler by any means. She basically makes every ask 10x harder to complete by her defiance. NOT COMPLAINING. I've worked with kids for 10+ years and I know what the job entails. I asked for a $1 raise after 15 months of no offer and the husband gave me a look of "you've got to be kidding me". I just knew it was something he didn't want to deal with. Was it out of line for me to ask for a raise? He sort of made excuses to why he maybe couldn't. Told me he wasn't going to say no but had to talk to his wife. They said they would talk about it more with me after April and taxes are filed. I believe they will give raise, but I am also a bit hurt about the way I feel under appreciated. I would like to get a parent's input.

[Anonymous]

How much do you make now per hour?

[Anonymous]

Not at all. It is out of line for them to put you in a position that you had to ask and for them to put it off until after taxes. Be prepared for them to find someone else and let you go. I would send them an email confirming your conversation and your discussion on april16, 2013.

[Anonymous]

You were not out of line. It's common to get a raise after a year of employment in our field. If the duties have changed and you are doing more work, it's totally reasonable to receive a raise. I think I would ask your bosses to sit down together and go over what has changed and why you believe a raise is in order. Can I ask how many hours your work and what your rate is? Good luck OP, I hope they come to their senses and value you enough to show you their appreciation by giving you a raise.

[Anonymous]

I do not think it means you are about to get let go. You were not out of line but they are clearly FT parents. there are TONS of FT parents that simply don't know it's very common to give an annual increase. Personally though I think a $1/hr jump is very high for 1 year and same number of kids. of course the baby is more challenging - did you expect that it would stay the same? I think you need to frame it as typical for the industry and try to pull up some nanny websites to back that up. But also be prepared for them to counter with a lower raise figure.

Honestly though - why do so many nannies get bent out of shape when FT parents make mistakes that are quite likely due to simply not being familiar w/ the nanny market/norms? YOU have been nannying for years - they are new to this. It doesn't mean you shouldn't try to negotiate for typical wages/raises/perks - but it should influence how you approach your MB/DB in asking about things if they don't offer them up front themselves. FT parents who may not realize something is common is a totally different issue from long-time nanny employers who are simply being stingey.

[Anonymous]

OP was in no way out of line to request a raise. Kudos to her for doing that, provided that she did it in a professional way. Ordinarily, I would say the professional way to handle this would be to request a sit-down with both parents to discuss performance and compensation. Unless DB brought up the subject, requesting a raise in casual conversation will almost never yield the desired reaction. You simply caught him off guard.

Also, there is no reason to conclude that the parents were out of line or "made a mistake" because they didn't voluntarily offer a raise after a year. Annual increases are not an entitlement in any job, especially in this economy. Many nannies get them, and many don't. This is not necessarily a function of how much they value you. They may think you are great, but may also conclude that you are appropriately compensated already, based on their sense of market rates. Or maybe they would love to pay you more, but they haven't had raises for years and don't feel they can afford to give you one.

[Anonymous]

19:24, everyone who has ever had a job knows that a yearly raise is a fact of life. To excuse cheap people by saying FT parents expect a nanny to work for years without a raise is beyond absurd.

[Anonymous]

20:06, I have had many jobs and have gone many years without a raise. My raises come when I get a promotion or convince my employer that a raise would be appropriate based on superior performance, a change in duties, or market conditions. Often adjustements are made every two years, although in that case the raise often reflects the fact that it has been two years since a prior increase.

And no one here has suggested that a nanny should work years without a raise. The OP has only been in her job for 15 months; that is not exactly "working for years without a raise."

[Anonymous]

I don't think you were out of line to ask- though I hope you didn't cite the stupid reason of a baby being less work than a toddler or I'd give you the same look!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:20:06, I have had many jobs and have gone many years without a raise. My raises come when I get a promotion or convince my employer that a raise would be appropriate based on superior performance, a change in duties, or market conditions. Often adjustements are made every two years, although in that case the raise often reflects the fact that it has been two years since a prior increase.

And no one here has suggested that a nanny should work years without a raise. The OP has only been in her job for 15 months; that is not exactly "working for years without a raise."

She has been there 15 months and if she has been doing a very good job during her time with them so far AND is not just dealing with a child with more energy, BUT also doing more within the job than maybe was originally stated (extra job duties that were never mentioned and slowly became added on), then I think a raise at this time is totally fair.

Now if she hasn't been doing a great job in the minds of the parents, just average work, and these duties were something that were already expected of her once the child started to reach a certain age (like cooking all 3 meals once child is eating foods and not just on bottles, etc), then a raise is not necessarily due at this time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:19:24, everyone who has ever had a job knows that a yearly raise is a fact of life. To excuse cheap people by saying FT parents expect a nanny to work for years without a raise is beyond absurd.

A yearly review is standard, a raise should be earned. Asking for a raise by telling your employer it's a "fact of life" will get you nowhere.

[Anonymous]

Not to be rude OP, but what did you expect after 15 months? That the baby would still be a baby? Of course as she gets older, you have to adapt to her needs and I don't see anything unusual about cleaning up after her, making meals, and keeping her busy. Those are very basic nanny duties imo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not to be rude OP, but what did you expect after 15 months? That the baby would still be a baby? Of course as she gets older, you have to adapt to her needs and I don't see anything unusual about cleaning up after her, making meals, and keeping her busy. Those are very basic nanny duties imo.

Of course needs change, and so should compensation. There is a reason nannies are given raises yearly, and its because their job duties can change so substantially in a year, as compared to a corporate job where the duties remain essentially the same until you are given a promotion (and a raise to go with it). Parents complain when it's the other way around (kids are older/in preschool) and nanny has much less work to do (and I understand this complaint) but it goes both ways. Compensation should always be kept in line with the duties.

[Anonymous]

MB here. I don't think you were out of line at all to request a raise, and I also agree w/ a couple of the posters who generously said that sometimes new parents just don't realize that they need to think about employing a nanny as professionally as they would think about employing someone in their workplace. (For that matter, lots of people don't have jobs where they deal w/ hiring, supervising, raises, etc... so it's entirely possible for people to be well-meaning but clumsy at employing a nanny.)

Regardless, I would follow up w/ your bosses and request a conversation to talk about how they feel about the work you're doing, how the job has changed over the past 15 months, how you're feeling about the job, etc... A raise discussion and decision should happen in the context of an overall performance and job discussion.

In terms of the amount, $1/hour does seem like a significant raise but not an unreasonable one. It could be a difficult standard of raises for them to maintain over time - which is worth keeping in mind if you like the job well enough to consider being there for several years. There may be other things they can offer you if the money seems like an obstacle - coverage of health insurance for instance (employers don't have to pay taxes on that the same way as salary so it's a more straightforward outlay for them), more vacation time or flexibility, more covered holidays, classes for the child that you could take her to (gives you a bit of a break perhaps, or something fun to do), etc...

I think the best thing you can do (assuming you like these parents, the child, and the job) is gently guide them in the direction of a few basic employer/employee guidelines - don't just ask for a raise, ask for the overall conversation about the job. Have a range of things that allow them to demonstrate appreciation of your work so they don't feel like you're just "all about the hourly rate" (not saying you are - just suggesting a way to give them options), etc...

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:19:24, everyone who has ever had a job knows that a yearly raise is a fact of life. To excuse cheap people by saying FT parents expect a nanny to work for years without a raise is beyond absurd.

A yearly review is standard, a raise should be earned. Asking for a raise by telling your employer it's a "fact of life" will get you nowhere.

y.

I've .ever had a job where I did.'t receive a raise during annual review.