Nanny lied about background

[Anonymous]

We started a PT nanny share with friend's existing nanny around Christmas time. She came highly recommended and our son loves her. But a few weeks ago she said a couple things that contradicted other things she had told us about her education and previous employment. I did some research and found out she's lying about her education and even the types of jobs she's had in the past. Our friends love this nanny and believe in her 100%. My DW says everyone fudges a bit, but it worries me. We're only supposed to use her till the end of the semester and my DW says she we should just sail it out so we don't offend our friends. I don't think they'd hear anything bad about this nanny and have brushed off any attempts to bring it up, they think we're too anal. I want to pull our DS now because I worry about the nanny's honestly as well as her mental status since some of her lies seem very big to me, for example she listed colleges she never attended and jobs she never had. She even listed on her application to an old nanny agency that she spoke Spanish fluently but doesn't speak a word. Would you trust you someone with your toddler who lied to you if your child seemed happy in her care?

[Anonymous]

Hello, ALWAYS trust your gut, and get on with your parenting responsibilities. Fire her. Again, trust your gut. Never wait. Tomorrow may be too late.

[Anonymous]

How do you know she never went to these colleges? Many women change their names when they marry. How do you know she didn't do those jobs? Are you just now getting around to checking references? You're not making sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you know she never went to these colleges? Many women change their names when they marry. How do you know she didn't do those jobs? Are you just now getting around to checking references? You're not making sense.

+1

But if she is lying, you should drop her now.

[Anonymous]

17:02, you are wrong on this one. None of your questions matter at all. When Mom has a bad "gut feeling", that is all that matters. Nothing else. It's children here. You don't risk your children with a liar. Period.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you know she never went to these colleges? Many women change their names when they marry. How do you know she didn't do those jobs? Are you just now getting around to checking references? You're not making sense.

OP here. I kick myself that we never did an independent background check since our friends have used her for years and raved about her. This was on me and I admit that. I investigate people for a living and should have known better. The nanny had signed a release when we hired her giving us permission to do the check and we didn't bother until I saw red flags. I now know her entire history from the age of 18 forward. Where she lived. Which colleges she did or did not attend, etc. None of the history she gave us on her resume matches up with what I've found.

[Anonymous]

OP,

If all you are saying is true, fire her. If your friends don't understand, that's their issue. I would not want my child around someone who is a pathological liar.

Signed,
A nanny

[Anonymous]

Just pull you kid out. But I can't wrap my head around the fact that a so called private investigator didn't do a background check on a nanny. That just sounds like bs to me. If she lied about education and jobs, it's because she wanted to get a better paying position.

[Anonymous]

How much does she earn, OP?

[Anonymous]

Uggh, it doesn't matter how much she earns. If she's willing to lie to this extent then you can't trust her. Your friends probably have no idea what she does during the day and have simply convinced themselves that she is wonderful. Denial and willful blindness run rampant with nanny employers and there are a minority of nannies who love to take advantage of this.

[Anonymous]

No, her pay rate doesn't excuse her lying. However, I prefer having as many pieces to the puzzle as possible. OP may feel uncomfortable disclosing her nanny's pay, especially if it was low to average.

[Anonymous]

Her pay rate is 100% irrelevant to this question, PP. She could be paid $1/hr and it is still totally irrelevant

Those are huge lies, OP, not just truth-shading. She needs to go and you need to tell your friends who perhaps did not do a background check.

[Anonymous]

Get rid of her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you know she never went to these colleges? Many women change their names when they marry. How do you know she didn't do those jobs? Are you just now getting around to checking references? You're not making sense.

OP here. I kick myself that we never did an independent background check since our friends have used her for years and raved about her. This was on me and I admit that. I investigate people for a living and should have known better. The nanny had signed a release when we hired her giving us permission to do the check and we didn't bother until I saw red flags. I now know her entire history from the age of 18 forward. Where she lived. Which colleges she did or did not attend, etc. None of the history she gave us on her resume matches up with what I've found.

If you investigate people, then you probably know that sometimes people with a similar or same name get mixed up

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you know she never went to these colleges? Many women change their names when they marry. How do you know she didn't do those jobs? Are you just now getting around to checking references? You're not making sense.

OP here. I kick myself that we never did an independent background check since our friends have used her for years and raved about her. This was on me and I admit that. I investigate people for a living and should have known better. The nanny had signed a release when we hired her giving us permission to do the check and we didn't bother until I saw red flags. I now know her entire history from the age of 18 forward. Where she lived. Which colleges she did or did not attend, etc. None of the history she gave us on her resume matches up with what I've found.

If you investigate people, then you probably know that sometimes people with a similar or same name get mixed up

If she investigates people AS A JOB she probably knows how to verify those minor details.

OP, if she's lied about everything I don't see how you could possibly leave your child with her even one more time. Fire her immediately.