Baby's health not improving

[Anonymous]

Kid I nanny for has a medical problem that MB took him to the pediatrician for, ped blew it off. I told MB to get a referral to a specialist, she thought it was a great idea and got the referral. The specialist told her there was a chance it could be other things and he recommended an exploratory procedure that MB didn't want to do because she didn't trust the specialist and the procedure involves intubation. I said, lets wait a month and if he hasn't gained weight, reevaluate. It has been a month with no weight gain, he is 4 months, I have care for dozens of special needs kids and I think this little boy is sick and needs more medical interventions. Have any of you nannies had to deal with telling MB to get baby medical involvement? Both parents work in medicine, but this is their first child and they have no child experience. Sorry for being so vague, in case MB sees it.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I do have parents follow my recommendations. Once had a pediatrician who prescribed steroids. Right there I asked both the mb and the md, if we could delay the harsh drugs for 10 days to give me an opportunity to first try something else.

My non-prescription alternative worked!

Obviously, every situation is different, but so far, all of my recommendations have turned out to be correct.

I used to spend most of my days reading mb's AMA (and others) medical journals/books. So I got to research anything that was of interest to me. I've been intensely curious about alternative-care pediatrics and health care, since my teens. So I do have quite an extensive library of my own.

[Anonymous]

I had to get pushy once with a MB who thought her child didn't need to see the ped. He had retraction with each breath. I knew he was at risk of hospitalization if he wasn't treated/didn't improve promptly.

She agreed to let me take him after a long discussion.

[Anonymous]

Examples of the stark differences between a professional nanny and a sitter. A sitter simply takes direction, where as a professional is expected to know how to perform her professional duties.

This is how inept caregiver choices can have unimaginable consequences. Unfortunate that many, not all, of these families could have afforded much better care for their children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Examples of the stark differences between a professional nanny and a sitter. A sitter simply takes direction, where as a professional is expected to know how to perform her professional duties.

This is how inept caregiver choices can have unimaginable consequences. Unfortunate that many, not all, of these families could have afforded much better care for their children.

What are you talking about? Who's an inept caregiver?

[Anonymous]

....No one in this thread, pp.

[Anonymous]

Jeez, sounds significant to me. I'm an MB and I don't understand why a mother that was receptive enough to your expertise to take him to the specialist hasn't followed up w/ another specialist or at least another pediatrician. Seems very odd. And very worrisome.

Can you suggest another pediatrician? Or is the pediatrician in a practice w/ other pediatricians so someone else can document the lack of weight gain, comments of the specialist (who should have sent a letter back to the pediatrician documenting concerns - and if he/she didn't the parents should be able to get documentation of it), pay attention to follow through etc?

Sounds tough for you - you can't force a parent to do anything. But I can't understand why a parent, let alone a first time mother, would be so seemingly non-responsive in this case.

[Anonymous]

I was once working with divorcing parents, and I had a medical concern for the child. I politely told the parents that would like a note for my file, stating that the child's pediatrition was "aware" of my observations and concerns.
I felt that I wanted that, especially in light of the legal proceedings pending between the parents.
The parents promptly complied with my wishes.

[Anonymous]

OP, what did the MB say when you brought up that it has been a month and things haven't gotten better? You didn't explain whether or not you've had that conversation and how it's gone before.

My nanny doesn't have any SN kid experience and if she thought something was up with my child you'd better believe I'd be all over it.

[Anonymous]

OP here...I brought it up again to MB, third time. She is following up on peds advice and I also shared my feelings on ped not being good and switching peds, which she is going to look into if things continue. Follow up with ped next week. Thanks everyone, it's nice to know I'm not alone. Also, MB is against reflux meds but I'm trying to get her to consider them... Little guy is miserable.

[Anonymous]

Do you think MB is waiting for his 4 mos check-up to see if the child has gained any weight and ask for another referral to a different specialist?

[Anonymous]

sorry- PP here. Didn't read your last post OP. Hope everything works out- you sound fantastic!

[Anonymous]

I had a good friend with a baby that was miserable, had terrible reflux and not gaining weight. Mom was also a mess because of this. She denied there was a problem. Poor little guy was clearly in trouble. I tried so many times to get her to take him to the doctor. Didn't work. Her child now has serious food issues and failure to thrive 2 years later. I really, really wish she had listened to me...Unfortunetely you cannot make someone see something if they are not willing to. It is very sad for the lil ones. BTW...she still doesn't see the problem. Her child weighs 0%, can't tolerate many food textures and barely eats.

[Anonymous]

I've had to be pushy twice. One time it was a life threatening issue. The other was several acid reflux. Both sets of parents were glad they listened to me.

If it gets worse and you feel he is in danger call cps