infant twins+3 yo - successful child care arrangement for 2 WOH parents?

[Anonymous]

Nannies would you take a job in this situation? Parents, have you had a successful experience with FT child care for twin infants + 3 y/o? Looking for advice for those who've BTDT about potential child care arrangements in the following situation (cross-post from general parenting forum):

We're expecting twins when our DS will just turn 3. DH and I work FT downtown, commuting from close-in MoCo. DS is currently in daycare downtown, but we're not thrilled with the place. Before we found out about the twins, we were thinking of moving him to a morning preschool closer to our house and getting an au pair.

With twins coming, a nanny with twin or share experience seems like the way to go. I can't imagine hauling a 3 yo and two babies to/from downtown daycare everyday!

But what to do about the 3 year old? If he goes to a preschool near our house, it is reasonable to ask a nanny to care for infant twins and a 3 year old every afternoon? Is it reasonable to ask the nanny to pick him up from preschool, or will that throw off the schedule with the twins? Does it matter if the preschool is w/in easy walking distance of our house? Or would we need to find another arrangement (maybe college student) to transport DS home from preschool. Or leave him in FT daycare?

What's reasonable to pay a nanny in this situation? We have a BR suite in the basement to do a live-in option.

Twins will be about 3-4 months old when I have to go back to work. DS currently naps in the afternoon from 1-3, but that may start dropping down by the time the twins are born.

Advice appreciated. And please--no comments about how I should to give up my job and stay home with the kids. It's not in the cards.

Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Nannies would you take a job in this situation?

Yes, there's nothing about this that would turn me off.

But what to do about the 3 year old?

Personally I would recommend at least PT preschool, but you could keep him home with the nanny if you really wanted to.

If he goes to a preschool near our house, it is reasonable to ask a nanny to care for infant twins and a 3 year old every afternoon?

Yes, perfectly reasonable.

Is it reasonable to ask the nanny to pick him up from preschool, or will that throw off the schedule with the twins?

Perfectly reasonable. It may disrupt their schedules, yes, but that is part of having multiple kids. Be upfront about what her days will look like and hire someone experienced and they'll be fine.

Does it matter if the preschool is w/in easy walking distance of our house?

Yes, that makes it much more manageable and means less time wasted getting all the kids bundled in and out of the car.

Or would we need to find another arrangement (maybe college student) to transport DS home from preschool. Or leave him in FT daycare?

I don't think either of those should be necessary.

What's reasonable to pay a nanny in this situation? We have a BR suite in the basement to do a live-in option.

Since she'll have the twins FT and the 3yo PT, I'd think $20-22/hr would get you a great and experienced live-out nanny. Like the other MB who recently posted about twin infants and a toddler, I'll echo the same advice she got on her thread: hire someone who's done this before. Juggling lots of (sometimes screaming) kids can frazzle even the calmest nanny, so pay accordingly and you'll get someone great. Don't know about live-in pay, but obviously that would be cheaper - it would also be a different group of nannies applying for LI vs. LO.

Good luck, and congratulations on your expanding family!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Nannies would you take a job in this situation?

Yes, there's nothing about this that would turn me off.

But what to do about the 3 year old?

Personally I would recommend at least PT preschool, but you could keep him home with the nanny if you really wanted to.

If he goes to a preschool near our house, it is reasonable to ask a nanny to care for infant twins and a 3 year old every afternoon?

Yes, perfectly reasonable.

Is it reasonable to ask the nanny to pick him up from preschool, or will that throw off the schedule with the twins?

Perfectly reasonable. It may disrupt their schedules, yes, but that is part of having multiple kids. Be upfront about what her days will look like and hire someone experienced and they'll be fine.

Does it matter if the preschool is w/in easy walking distance of our house?

Yes, that makes it much more manageable and means less time wasted getting all the kids bundled in and out of the car.

Or would we need to find another arrangement (maybe college student) to transport DS home from preschool. Or leave him in FT daycare?

I don't think either of those should be necessary.

What's reasonable to pay a nanny in this situation? We have a BR suite in the basement to do a live-in option.

Since she'll have the twins FT and the 3yo PT, I'd think $20-22/hr would get you a great and experienced live-out nanny. Like the other MB who recently posted about twin infants and a toddler, I'll echo the same advice she got on her thread: hire someone who's done this before. Juggling lots of (sometimes screaming) kids can frazzle even the calmest nanny, so pay accordingly and you'll get someone great. Don't know about live-in pay, but obviously that would be cheaper - it would also be a different group of nannies applying for LI vs. LO.

Good luck, and congratulations on your expanding family!

Great advice PP. I agree with everything you said. OP, I think you should be able to find a great nanny for your children. Good luck

[Anonymous]

I do either live-in or live-out. Live-in jobs need to pay more. It's asking me to give up tons. But that's just me. Maybe someone out there lives likes to live-in, even of they could afford to live out.

[Anonymous]

18.46 hit the nail on the head 100%.

One thing I'll add: you don't mention how many hours you need. If you can work your schedule with your DH so that the nanny is only needed between 40-45 hours per week, that will help.

A 50 hour workweek with three kids might be pretty daunting for some.

[nannydebsays]

Nannies would you take a job in this situation? Parents, have you had a successful experience with FT child care for twin infants + 3 y/o?

I would if the pay was right and there was a nanny car for use on the job.

But what to do about the 3 year old?

IMO, that depends on what you and the child will be happiest with. If he would be happy at home with preschool half days a few time a week, go with that. If he'd be happier with full day preschool closer to home, go with that. BTW, even if he is dropping naps at that time, institute "quiet time", for your sanity and the sanity of your nanny. With 3 under 4 anyone with the kids all day will NEED an hour to relax!

If he goes to a preschool near our house, it is reasonable to ask a nanny to care for infant twins and a 3 year old every afternoon?

Yes, as long as there is a way for nanny to do pick-up and drop-off in any sort of weather.

Is it reasonable to ask the nanny to pick him up from preschool, or will that throw off the schedule with the twins?

2nd and 3rd kids have to accommodate their older siblings schedules - that's just a fact of life! If you hire a nanny with lots of experience, she will be able to juggle the needs of all 3 kids.

Does it matter if the preschool is w/in easy walking distance of our house?

No, because walking with infant twins and a preschooler in any sport of bad weather will be a turn-off. Would you do the walk to school in rain/snow/heat with 3 under 4?

Or would we need to find another arrangement (maybe college student) to transport DS home from preschool. Or leave him in FT daycare?

As I said above, a nanny car makes the most sense in this situation. That will allow nanny to both transport your older child to school and back, and allow her to go out with your twins when they are old enough to do playgroups, activities, etc.

What's reasonable to pay a nanny in this situation? We have a BR suite in the basement to do a live-in option.

I would shy away from live-in unless your BR suite is an apartment with a kitchen/kitchenette and living area, as well as a bedroom and private bath, located away from the family living/play areas.

Reasonable pay depends on the experience level and education of the nanny. You might want to consider making a "dream nanny" description, and then asking local agencies what your dream nanny would cost you. You also need to take into account what you want from nanny beyond childcare and the related household tasks. With 20 years experience, and extensive newborn experience, I'd expect $22/hour for the job with basic childcare expectations and basic benefits. A nanny with 5 years experience might be willing to take $16/hour with the same package.

You need to determine your budget, how long you want to keep the nanny, and how much experience the nanny has to have to get a good read on costs. If you can spend up to $25/hour does that include room for bonuses and raises, as well as your share of the taxes? Or do you expect to pay $25/hour PLUS the above items?

[Anonymous]

You want to get an AU PAIR for three little kids. First you need more hours than the Au Pair can do. Second the babies have to be a certain age first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You want to get an AU PAIR for three little kids. First you need more hours than the Au Pair can do. Second the babies have to be a certain age first.

What are you even talking about? OP said she was thinking about an AP before she found out she was expecting twins - now she is planning on hiring a nanny.