Need advice from BTDT

[Anonymous]

I nanny for an incredibly smart and adorable little boy. We are currently trying to transition him from 2 naps a day to 1. We figured he was ready since he was only taking a 30-45 minute AM nap and refusing the PM nap. I've managed to keep him up and entertain him until 12:00 today and could tell he was ready to get into the crib. He will happily fall asleep if I'm holding him but the moment he goes into crib he starts to fuss and cry. He's been CIO for 30 minutes now and I feel terrible listening to him upstairs cry but feel there is no other option. MB/DB are on the same page with me but I just feel terrible making him figure it out. Do any parents or nannies have any "been there down that" experience and/or advice? I know it's a hard transition and we all have to be patient. Looking for the light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

You didn't mention his age... Makes a huge difference.
Are you a new nanny?

[Anonymous]

He's 19 months. I've been nannying for over 10 years. The majority of my experience is with newborns up to 12-15 months when most families I've worked for send the child to daycare.

[Anonymous]

That's way to long to CIO. 5-10 minutes. You can try sitting in his room on the floor and holding his hand. He may not be ready for one nap. I would stick to two naps. They gradually change themselves. We went a while flipping between 1-2 naps a day.

[Anonymous]

Go in every few min, longer stretches each time...five minutes, then seven min later, then ten min later etc. The first time or two you can talk to him briefly, sh sh sh, it's om, time to go night night etc. Rub his back or head or the forehead/between the eyes. The will make him close his eyes and it's relaxing. After the second time don't say anything, just rub his back, head etc for a couple of min and then silently leave. It usually only takes 3 times of going in before they fall asleep. Also, he might be over tired....try an 11/1130 nap tomorrow. You may have better luck.

[Anonymous]

He might be overly tired. I'd try feeding him a good snack with protein (cheese, eggs, etc) around 11 and putting him down at 11.30 for a while. Then you can slowly push the nap backwards to a better time, and he can have a more substantial lunch before nap.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Right now the family and I are trying to make this transition knowing that there are going to be bumps in the road. I forgot to mention that he is also teething right now which could also be a factor in his shortened naps and sometimes straight up refusing to sleep at all. For the past two days I have given him the opportunity to have a morning nap and we decided if he isn't asleep within 15 minutes to skip the AM nap and keep him up until 11:45/12:00. Yesterday, it worked. Today, not so much. I do not think that CIO should only last 5-10 minutes. Sometimes he will fuss for 15 (whining, not hysterically crying) and then put himself to sleep. The holding his hand method has not worked for his parents. He is not one to lay down in his crib if anyone is in the room. I appreciate the feedback and suggestions from everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go in every few min, longer stretches each time...five minutes, then seven min later, then ten min later etc. The first time or two you can talk to him briefly, sh sh sh, it's om, time to go night night etc. Rub his back or head or the forehead/between the eyes. The will make him close his eyes and it's relaxing. After the second time don't say anything, just rub his back, head etc for a couple of min and then silently leave. It usually only takes 3 times of going in before they fall asleep. Also, he might be over tired....try an 11/1130 nap tomorrow. You may have better luck.

+1

This is also the method I tend to use for CIO (some children get MORE hysterical if you go in, but mostly this seems to work for me). Like PP said, usually the third visit is the last one needed.

[Anonymous]

This is so heartbreaking. But it's hard to know when you can't see what's going on.

[Anonymous]

What is heartbreaking? The child is not in hysterics, and at 19 months he needs to be able to fall asleep without being held the entire time.

[Anonymous]

With twins we started around 18-19 months.
Try this

Give baby a snack (larger) around 10:30 or so, if he takes milk or a bottle give him that too. Then start the bed time routine. Try starting around 11 or 11:30 maybe go for a walk or have some outside time before nap. then slowly work up the nap time if your goal is 12:30 or 1 then increase by 15 mins every few days or so.

What works with the twins is giving them one board book in the crib it helps them learn to self soothe

Also another thing we did was micro naps. 10-15 mins in the morning. esp when teething or had a hard night
the earlier the better. try 9 or 9:30 depending on when he wakes up in the am.

GOOD LUCK! its a stressful time but so rewarding when you have the mornings free to do activities... it seems thats when all the good playgroups are!!

[Anonymous]

Thank you PP. Our goal is a 12:00-1:30/2:00 nap and I know we will get there eventually. Appreciate the suggestions.

[Anonymous]

Can you get a baby monitor with a camera so you can see what he is doing while crying?

[Anonymous]

OP again. Here's what he's doing. First he throws the stuffed animals out of crib, next his blanket. After that, he stands up in crib and jumps up and down. I leave the door cracked so I can always see what is going on in his room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP again. Here's what he's doing. First he throws the stuffed animals out of crib, next his blanket. After that, he stands up in crib and jumps up and down. I leave the door cracked so I can always see what is going on in his room.

then stop putting all that crap in his crib! Not much you can do about the jumping aside from telling him to lay down. If you do it enough he'll eventually lay down when he sees you.