Need Some Advice Re: My Job

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All young children will end up with bumps and bruises. It is all par for the course.
Obviously the child was not hurt since it appears her physician did not even order for an xray to be run.
Just my personal opinion, but as a parent myself I would not take the time to take my child in for falling off playground equipment as long as it wasn’t above cement. Because that is not something to take your child in for. If the limping were something that concerned me I maybe would but it is very telling that the parents here stated that the physician did not perform any xrays.

My thought?
I think these parents lied to you about her limping, I strongly doubt they even took the time to take their kid to seek medical care.
They are just helicopter parents who believe that if a child is hurt while around anyone but them then they must have been neglected or abused.

Leave this job as soon as you have another one lined up.
Oh and my own son just turned two last October and he does climb the ladder bars on the play equipment on his own. Yes he has fallen off many times (mostly by going too fast!) but the playground I take him to is geared for kids 2-5 so I doubt they would have bars there that would be too high or complicated for a child his age.

My first thought after reading this post was that I did not truly believe the parents actually took the time to take their child in to see a doctor.
Reason being is that urgent or emergency care would need a compelling reason and just the fact that the child was limping is not considered life-threatening.

I think the parents have guilt that they were at work and thus it is common though not always just, to place blame on the child’s caregiver in order to alleviate guilt on the parent’s part.

These parents need to find a way to deal with “working parent’s guilt” because if they do not, they will never be able to keep a good nanny around.

[Anonymous]

In order for a cohesive relationship to exist between both a parent and their child’s caregiver, it is every parent’s responsibility to grant full autonomy to their caregiver while they cannot be there.
After all it is only fair to do so.

Parents need to accept that their childcare provider may not do things exactly as the parent does but that in no way diminishes what they do.
Parents need to respect that their provider is in full charge with only the child’s best interest in mind.

If a parent is unwilling or unable to do this > then they need to stay home & care for their child on their own.
Period.

OP: Your bosses still have not accepted the fact that you deserve full autonomy in your position and likely never will.
They obviously do not respect you or all you are doing for their family.
Quit now before things get messy.
Because if you stay with them, who knows what could happen in the future?

Their child falls down and they sue you for negligence of a minor??!!

[Anonymous]

OP clearly does not have trust of the parents. Our 2 yo got hurt while in the care of nanny. It was an accident where she twisted her arm and our nanny was quite upset and worried for our child. We did take our child to urgent care and they took x-rays as toddlers are not able to explain what is hurting. We never blamed the nanny and things worked out ok. We had to assure our nanny it was all going to be ok. I don't know how we would have reacted if instead, she appeared to be dismissive or defensive. OP, try to see from a parent's perspective and don't take it personally they took their child to the doctor!

[Anonymous]

OP stated that she worked for this family for the past 18 mos. so if the family does not trust her at this point, they never will.

I would quit a job where I was in charge of a child and the parents did not trust me.
They seem very strict to me.

What is telling in this case is that their doctor did not run an X-ray on the child which clearly shows the doctor was not concerned that the child may have broken bones, only the parents did.

OP needs to find another family to work for, one where she does not have to sweat it if her charge gets hurt.

[Anonymous]

I agree that ALL working parents feel some guilt that they have to leave their child with a nanny.
It is almost a given that even if their child sustains a tiny bump, it will only make the parents feel more guilt.
Which could be why they react the way they do.

It isn’t fair to their nanny obviously but it is what it is.
It would be awesome if a nanny could find a family to work for where the parents trust her 120 percent but jobs like that sadly do not exist.
Nannies will always take the fall whenever a child in their care gets hurt.
It is the liability factor that discourages many from other domestic work.

At least there is insurance if a maid breaks an expensive vase.
Nannies cannot be insured or bonded.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been a part-time Nanny for a 2 yr old little girl for the past 18 mos.

I have formed a strong bond w/her and things have overall gone well.

Until yesterday afternoon.
We were at the playground & she was climbing the bars up but accidentally lost her grasp and fell on the mat below.

She cried briefly but then got up and played again a few min. later.
She appeared to walk w/a slight limp afterward.

When I told her parents, they told me I should not have let her climb the bars w/o holding on to her.
(I had tried but she had took my hands off of her and said she wanted to do it herself.)
When she fell, I had been standing directly behind her but was not holding on to her.

Anyway the parents are super overprotective and had taken their daughter to her MD to hopefully get X-rays done because they thought she may have broken a bone, etc.
I waited for three hours, stressed out to only find out that he stopped limping + the Dr. wasn’t concerned.

I am now contemplating quitting this position as I thought I was treated unfairly.
Kids fall down, they get bumps and bruises > it’s part of being a kid.
Even when in the care of parents kids sometimes fall and get hurt.

Yet when in the care of a Nanny parents can be harsh and judgmental and assign blame to their Nanny.

Would it be unfair to quit?

They showed you who they are. Find a new job with people who understand that kids fall and, more importantly, people who trust you. Find job and give two weeks notice and never look back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP clearly does not have trust of the parents. Our 2 yo got hurt while in the care of nanny. It was an accident where she twisted her arm and our nanny was quite upset and worried for our child. We did take our child to urgent care and they took x-rays as toddlers are not able to explain what is hurting. We never blamed the nanny and things worked out ok. We had to assure our nanny it was all going to be ok. I don't know how we would have reacted if instead, she appeared to be dismissive or defensive. OP, try to see from a parent's perspective and don't take it personally they took their child to the doctor!

Bulk! OP has been we with them for 18 months and the react of the parents was over the top. They don't trust her and she should leave. Dreadful people.

[Anonymous]

I have worked for parents like this in my past history as a Nanny & trust me OP - they will NEVER trust you.

Anytime their child gets hurt while under your care > they will blame you + hold you fully liable.

They are very overprotective and strict and will blame you for not caring for their child in a proper fashion.

While if the child were to hurt himself when in their care, they will simply shrug it off as a mere accident.

Smh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had let my charges watch fifteen minutes of Cocomelon on T.V. so I could wash their lunch dishes/cups as well as wipe down the table and benches after a very messy lunch.

When the father returned home, he yelled at me for letting his kids watch “that garbage.”
He likened it to me actually giving them crack!!!??

I have watched many episodes of this program and it is whimsical, fun as well as educational to a hilt.
I admire how they named the children in them after the Watts kids who were murdered in CO in late ‘18……

You should have told him to go to Hell and quit on the spot. No employer had the right to yell, scream, or raise their voice to an employee for any reason.

[Anonymous]

^^ I agree, how degrading!
I have had a parent yell at me before (in front of company even!) and I immediately demanded any monies owed me and walked out of that job immediately.

No parent has ANY right to raise their voice + disrespect their Nanny!
Ever!!

And to throw such an accusation like subjecting children to CRACK!!?
That Father believes all the noise he hears online is all I have to say about that.

[Anonymous]

I would be out of there so fast.

Parents not trusting me would be so detrimental to my work morale that I just couldn’t stay.

[Anonymous]

Leave.
And do not look back.
Because if you do not, you will be on here in a few months telling us that the parents are suing you in court over their child’s injury while under your supervision.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leave.
And do not look back.
Because if you do not, you will be on here in a few months telling us that the parents are suing you in court over their child’s injury while under your supervision.

This

[KaylieMoses]

Children can indeed fall and get injured, and this is part of their normal development. Parents' understanding and response may vary, especially when their child is exposed to trauma. It is necessary to maintain an open dialogue with parents and listen to their concerns and point of view. Perhaps, after the situation is resolved, they will take a more calm attitude towards what happened.

[Anonymous]

Hopefully you have left these overprotective and unrealistic bosses and moved on to a normal family OP!