Feeling free

[Anonymous]

I never felt this way about our former nanny. I can’t even imagine...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also get it OP. Our first nanny was beloved, and is still a part of our lives and very close with our kids. But she relied on us for so much outside the parameters of the job (help when car broke down, taking her to urgent care when sick, helping her find a new apartment and then helping her move, helping her with taxes/insurance decisions, etc...)

We loved her like family and with that came a level of responsibility and concern far beyond typical employment. In fact, she still has that kind of pull on us (I spent an hour with her this weekend trying to help her w/ a current job search.)

Congrats on a wonderfully long and positive tenure - and enjoy the stress relief of no longer feeling responsible for her! (Though know that probably won't fully go away!)

100% this. This feeling doesn’t make you a cruel or heartless person, nanny/employer relationships are complicated! Assuming you treat the nanny wel while she works for you, I Completely understand the feeling of not having to manage the non-kid related issues that pop up. Not to mention the annoying things like nanny taxes, worker’s compensation insurance, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I never felt this way about our former nanny. I can’t even imagine...

+1. Our relationship with our former nanny is closer than when she was working for us. I missed her so much when she first left us. “Freedom” never entered my mind.

Then again, our nanny never had one outside issue that she ever concerned us with. She is an amazing woman. I don’t know why you people hire such drama queens to begin with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Such a cruel post to mark the end of your nanny’s ten years of service and love for your children.

I hope your nanny never reads what you wrote about her. So heartless.

It’s an anonymous post, pp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never felt this way about our former nanny. I can’t even imagine...

+1. Our relationship with our former nanny is closer than when she was working for us. I missed her so much when she first left us. “Freedom” never entered my mind.

Then again, our nanny never had one outside issue that she ever concerned us with. She is an amazing woman. I don’t know why you people hire such drama queens to begin with.

You’re lucky she was so professional to keep her personal life out of the workplace.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So your worry for the woman who loved and cared for your children ends when you stop paying her? You’re a phony, OP.

My nanny growing up stayed in our lives until she passed away. She and my mom were true friends. My brother and i both spoke at her funeral.

When you love someone, it’s forever.

Oh please. It's like being relieved when your kid grows up and moves out. You love them but it's a weight off your shoulders. One less person to consider for meals, one less person's dr appointments to keep track of, one less person moving things in the house, etc.

Exactly. So many pps projecting here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never felt this way about our former nanny. I can’t even imagine...

+1. Our relationship with our former nanny is closer than when she was working for us. I missed her so much when she first left us. “Freedom” never entered my mind.

Then again, our nanny never had one outside issue that she ever concerned us with. She is an amazing woman. I don’t know why you people hire such drama queens to begin with.

You’re lucky she was so professional to keep her personal life out of the workplace.

I don’t even know what that means. She didn’t keep her personal life out of the workplace - she told us when her mom died, what she did on the weekend or what friend she saw. She just has never been a burden. She’s always taken care of her life on her own and never needed our help (we needed her help -sometimes still do).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So your worry for the woman who loved and cared for your children ends when you stop paying her? You’re a phony, OP.

My nanny growing up stayed in our lives until she passed away. She and my mom were true friends. My brother and i both spoke at her funeral.

When you love someone, it’s forever.

Oh please. It's like being relieved when your kid grows up and moves out. You love them but it's a weight off your shoulders. One less person to consider for meals, one less person's dr appointments to keep track of, one less person moving things in the house, etc.

Exactly. So many pps projecting here.

I am not projecting anything! I simply never felt the way OP feels. Still don’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never felt this way about our former nanny. I can’t even imagine...

+1. Our relationship with our former nanny is closer than when she was working for us. I missed her so much when she first left us. “Freedom” never entered my mind.

Then again, our nanny never had one outside issue that she ever concerned us with. She is an amazing woman. I don’t know why you people hire such drama queens to begin with.

You’re lucky she was so professional to keep her personal life out of the workplace.

I don’t even know what that means. She didn’t keep her personal life out of the workplace - she told us when her mom died, what she did on the weekend or what friend she saw. She just has never been a burden. She’s always taken care of her life on her own and never needed our help (we needed her help -sometimes still do).

You said that she never had one outside issue that she ever concerned you with. That is what a true professional does. You got really lucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never felt this way about our former nanny. I can’t even imagine...

+1. Our relationship with our former nanny is closer than when she was working for us. I missed her so much when she first left us. “Freedom” never entered my mind.

Then again, our nanny never had one outside issue that she ever concerned us with. She is an amazing woman. I don’t know why you people hire such drama queens to begin with.

You’re lucky she was so professional to keep her personal life out of the workplace.

I don’t even know what that means. She didn’t keep her personal life out of the workplace - she told us when her mom died, what she did on the weekend or what friend she saw. She just has never been a burden. She’s always taken care of her life on her own and never needed our help (we needed her help -sometimes still do).

You said that she never had one outside issue that she ever concerned you with. That is what a true professional does. You got really lucky.

This.

We've had 3 nannies in the past decade (and a couple of fill-ins for long vacations) and only one of them kept her personal struggles to herself. It was so refreshing. Unfortunately, she was also the least reliable - tons of sick days, frequently late, and quit after a year. So we live with the overly personal nature of our relationship with other nannies.

[Anonymous]

OP if you're nanny worked for you for 10 years didn't you at least go through some tough times and your nanny weathered it through with you? Do you think your nanny is thinking right now "gee I loved the kids but it's nice not to deal with that mess anymore"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP if you're nanny worked for you for 10 years didn't you at least go through some tough times and your nanny weathered it through with you? Do you think your nanny is thinking right now "gee I loved the kids but it's nice not to deal with that mess anymore"?

Not OP but they might very well have thought that way about a nanny family. Stresses go both ways but that should be the subject of a different thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP if you're nanny worked for you for 10 years didn't you at least go through some tough times and your nanny weathered it through with you? Do you think your nanny is thinking right now "gee I loved the kids but it's nice not to deal with that mess anymore"?

My BIL’s household is a hot mess so I’m sure his nannies have felt that way. Loved the kids but glad not to be dealing with that day-in and day-out anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never felt this way about our former nanny. I can’t even imagine...

+1. Our relationship with our former nanny is closer than when she was working for us. I missed her so much when she first left us. “Freedom” never entered my mind.

Then again, our nanny never had one outside issue that she ever concerned us with. She is an amazing woman. I don’t know why you people hire such drama queens to begin with.

You’re lucky she was so professional to keep her personal life out of the workplace.

I don’t even know what that means. She didn’t keep her personal life out of the workplace - she told us when her mom died, what she did on the weekend or what friend she saw. She just has never been a burden. She’s always taken care of her life on her own and never needed our help (we needed her help -sometimes still do).

You said that she never had one outside issue that she ever concerned you with. That is what a true professional does. You got really lucky.

This.

We've had 3 nannies in the past decade (and a couple of fill-ins for long vacations) and only one of them kept her personal struggles to herself. It was so refreshing. Unfortunately, she was also the least reliable - tons of sick days, frequently late, and quit after a year. So we live with the overly personal nature of our relationship with other nannies.

Maybe we did just get lucky as our nanny was never once late and was only sick when my kids made her sick! Unbelievably reliable and just a wonderful person. And she still loves my kids.

[Anonymous]

15:15 here and I'm just saying that having worked with and formed strong relationships with more than one past NF, we have all collectively weathered some %6*# together. When I leave it's like 5% feeling free and 95% sadness and mourning.