Nanny falling asleep on the couch with baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nanny here- the only issue I have is the child sleeping on her chest and the screentime. Otherwise, what she does on her break is her business. As a career nanny, I always tell families that doing chores while the children sleep should be optional for me if they want me to work for them. The family I currently work for doesn't care as long as the kids are okay, and I have finished everything we agreed on by the end of the day. Occasionally, I cannot finish and I explain why and make a plan to do it another time.

My reason being that there is no perfect guarantee that the child will sleep long enough for housework to be complete AND for me to take care of myself(food, uninterrupted bathroom break, enjoying the silence, inportant phone calls, etc.) On a daily basis. The child can easily wake up early and there goes her break before she finishes her "chores".

Before you fire your nanny, I suggest you sit down with her and go over ALL of your expectations and cover as many hypothetical situations as you can. Be openminded and really listen to what she has to say about her needs as well. You may find that there is an easy fix or compromise.

Most parents do housework while their children are awake, and rest when it is quiet. If that is a dealbreaker for you, then arrange a time daily where she will be undisturbed and someone else will take care of the child's needs while she does what she has to do. If she sleeps while the baby sleeps, then it does not matter as long as she does not sleep through the crying.

You resurrected a post from pre-covid...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Back when I only had one, and she napped twice a day, sometimes our nanny would nap during her second (afternoon) nap. But that was AFTER the baby was safely put down and the baby-related chores were done (or while the dryer was going).

I'd fire your nanny.

I wouldn't mind her napping with the baby if the baby was in a safe place in this situation but that is not safe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been trying to find feedback on this and most people seem to be divided on this issue.

But today I found our nanny napping on the couch with our baby on her chest. I’ve asked her in the past to be putting him down for all naps. She told me today he wouldn’t nap by himself when I woke her. I was a little startled. Especially because of the risk of him rolling off her and falling into the floor. I’m bothered because I’m not paying her to sleep on the job and have asked her to do light, baby related tasks while he’s napping.

This is kind of the second strike for us, as I’ve had to talk to her about too much screen time on the job with the TV on and cellphone usage.

Just wondering if this would be a fireable offense for other families and wanting input from other nannies as well. Do you let your nanny take naps on the job? Other nannies, have you napped while on the job?

I’m a former nanny myself and never did personally.

She’s obviously not a professional nanny.

[Anonymous]

Professional nanny for 25 years...

Firstly, everyone claiming its so dangerous etc. depends on how old the baby is. I have always had the baby sleep on me, would close my eyes, even fall asleep, but no matter what, a nanny never sleeps peacefully if on the job and has a baby she is holding. Subconsciously we are always alert and one little move from the baby will make you open your eyes. That being said. a lot of babies take have trouble falling asleep easily and need to be held or rocked or need a cozy cuddle to fall asleep. Once they are asleep, sometimes its hard to transfer them, they wake up as soon as they are moved or put down. Once they cry, we pick them back up and rock them etc. Many times iv just let them sleep on me because they need the sleep. i would be stiff and hurting, but would let the baby sleep.

There are many scenarios and reasons things happen, but parents who use the line ' I don't pay her to sleep" do not deserve to keep nannies. Treat us nannies like humans and caregivers and part of the family. If you pay her does not mean she should be working every second you are paying her, I used to have hours free, after finishing what i needed to do, i would do my schoolwork, be on my laptop or phone...all my families, never once objected to that, and i have worked for 5 families....5-6 years each.

If you want a nanny to love your child and give them the love and care that they need, you need to treat them that way, the child is your world, child comes first, if you breathe down their neck and have issues with making her work for every minute she is paid for, then I'm sorry you will never have a nanny who would last too long or long term. I would understand if the baby was awake she was napping on the couch. So parents, be more understanding, remember kids are not easy to take care of, you hire Us to help you, just like you get tired, the nanny needs a break and nap also and can also get tired... Just because you pay her, you do not control, slave or own her. I would quit so fast.

[Anonymous]

There have been studies on Sofas and Infant Deaths:
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25311597/

The study found that infants who died sleeping on a sofa were nearly twice as likely to die from suffocation or strangulation as babies who died sleeping elsewhere.

It's safer to sleep in a bed with the baby than on the sofa because of the uneven surface. Really risky.