I need help

[Anonymous]

I would not stay in a job where I am getting bruises everyday, especially for such little pay.

While I sincerely feel bad for his Mother, he needs counseling (perhaps medication as well) in order to curb his erratic behavior.

He could also benefit from a childcare provider who has specific training/expertise w/children like him too.

For now though, you need to extracate yourself from this toxic work situation & seek another family to work for.
If money is the issue here, then try to have another position lined up before you give notice to your boss.
Try to give at least two-three weeks notice.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I take care of a child like this. What works for me is to realize that I can’t and shouldn’t discipline this child. No time outs , I don’t take things away. When he hits me I apologize for whatever is upsetting him. I try to keep the peace and make him happy. IMO it’s what is best for my charge. I couldn’t do the job any other way. I still get hit but his outbursts are a lot less frequent.

ARE YOU JOKING?! Why in the world are you apologizing to hit who is hitting you?!

Neither one of you has the knowledge or experience to work with a child with this type of special needs. It’s okay, most people wouldn’t enjoy it, even if they knew what to do. But you have to be realistic for your safety and the child’s FUTURE!

You are setting up this child as a domestic abuser. Or child abuser. Or serial killer. Or maybe something a little less toxic, maybe just a guy who goes cruising bars for fights. Doesn’t matter. He’s learning NOW that violence gets what he wants, and nobody else can/will do anything about it.

There will come a point that the behavior will be too ingrained to be changed if HE doesn’t want to start the process. There will also come a point that he won’t care if he seriously hurts you, because everything is okay once it’s over, right?

Get out now. Tell the parent now. Tell the agency, if you found them through an agency.

Please! Protect yourself and protect this child by allowing someone else with the right tools to help him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not stay in a job where I am getting bruises everyday, especially for such little pay.

While I sincerely feel bad for his Mother, he needs counseling (perhaps medication as well) in order to curb his erratic behavior.

He could also benefit from a childcare provider who has specific training/expertise w/children like him too.

For now though, you need to extracate yourself from this toxic work situation & seek another family to work for.
If money is the issue here, then try to have another position lined up before you give notice to your boss.
Try to give at least two-three weeks notice.

Good luck!

I did. However, the child suffered trauma from a previous caregiver and was only three when I started. Knowing the history when I went in allowed me to make a decision, and knowing how strong even the strongest preschooler is helped me as well.

There’s a world of difference between 3 and 9 in terms of strength and (hopefully) empathy. Both ages can be helped, but it takes the right toolbox.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know where you are but every mom I know pays at least 15 and hour in my neighborhood and that’s for one kid. Most of $20 (that’s what we paid). Start interviewing now.