Frustrated at nanny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Sorry for any confusion. There are times when the baby is napping where it's fine if she leaves with the older DS to get outside for a bit. She always texts me ahead of time to confirm it's okay. And if there are times when it's not going to work for my schedule (like today), I'm very clear about it so there isn't confusion about who is in charge or responsible for the baby.

I asked her this evening what happened, and she said she planned on only being outside with DS1 for 5 minutes and then just lost track of time.

She has been a solid caretaker for a couple years so I'm definitely just giving a pass on this. I was admittedly very frustrated when it happened though.

OP that doesn't sound right, or at least it doesn't jibe with your earlier explanation. You said that when you texted her she said "she was not at home". But "outside for 5 minutes" sounds like in the yard.

I think you need to mention this again and say that you need her to ask and get confirmation in the future to avoid this. I am a really relaxed MB but I would not let this one go with no conversation. She didn't even let you know she was leaving? And certainly didn't ask permission? Even after you *specifically* said you could not help out today. Something is not cool. Was she at least profusely sorry that this was her mistake?

If not, I'm kind of wondering what you have let you in the past that you are not telling us. Because if she has always been awesome and now this I would definitely go back to it because this was really different.

DS1 wanted to push a little doll stroller outside so she said she was planning on just being out with him for 5 minutes, and they ended up walking around the neighborhood and she lost track of time. She was sorry.

If I didn't have a track record of her being an awesome nanny I would definitely have a harder time swallowing this one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Sorry for any confusion. There are times when the baby is napping where it's fine if she leaves with the older DS to get outside for a bit. She always texts me ahead of time to confirm it's okay. And if there are times when it's not going to work for my schedule (like today), I'm very clear about it so there isn't confusion about who is in charge or responsible for the baby.

I asked her this evening what happened, and she said she planned on only being outside with DS1 for 5 minutes and then just lost track of time.

She has been a solid caretaker for a couple years so I'm definitely just giving a pass on this. I was admittedly very frustrated when it happened though.

OP that doesn't sound right, or at least it doesn't jibe with your earlier explanation. You said that when you texted her she said "she was not at home". But "outside for 5 minutes" sounds like in the yard.

I think you need to mention this again and say that you need her to ask and get confirmation in the future to avoid this. I am a really relaxed MB but I would not let this one go with no conversation. She didn't even let you know she was leaving? And certainly didn't ask permission? Even after you *specifically* said you could not help out today. Something is not cool. Was she at least profusely sorry that this was her mistake?

If not, I'm kind of wondering what you have let you in the past that you are not telling us. Because if she has always been awesome and now this I would definitely go back to it because this was really different.

DS1 wanted to push a little doll stroller outside so she said she was planning on just being out with him for 5 minutes, and they ended up walking around the neighborhood and she lost track of time. She was sorry.

If I didn't have a track record of her being an awesome nanny I would definitely have a harder time swallowing this one.

I think you let it go OP. I wouldn't make a big deal of it. Especially if she has the awesome track record as you said. Now, if you weren't home and she left the sleeping baby that would be different. But it's not like your child was in any danger. I'm sure she realizes she messed up. She should have texted you, or taken the monitor with her and not gone too far from the house. She probably feels badly about the whole incident, I know I would.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Sorry for any confusion. There are times when the baby is napping where it's fine if she leaves with the older DS to get outside for a bit. She always texts me ahead of time to confirm it's okay. And if there are times when it's not going to work for my schedule (like today), I'm very clear about it so there isn't confusion about who is in charge or responsible for the baby.

I asked her this evening what happened, and she said she planned on only being outside with DS1 for 5 minutes and then just lost track of time.

She has been a solid caretaker for a couple years so I'm definitely just giving a pass on this. I was admittedly very frustrated when it happened though.

OP that doesn't sound right, or at least it doesn't jibe with your earlier explanation. You said that when you texted her she said "she was not at home". But "outside for 5 minutes" sounds like in the yard.

I think you need to mention this again and say that you need her to ask and get confirmation in the future to avoid this. I am a really relaxed MB but I would not let this one go with no conversation. She didn't even let you know she was leaving? And certainly didn't ask permission? Even after you *specifically* said you could not help out today. Something is not cool. Was she at least profusely sorry that this was her mistake?

If not, I'm kind of wondering what you have let you in the past that you are not telling us. Because if she has always been awesome and now this I would definitely go back to it because this was really different.

DS1 wanted to push a little doll stroller outside so she said she was planning on just being out with him for 5 minutes, and they ended up walking around the neighborhood and she lost track of time. She was sorry.

If I didn't have a track record of her being an awesome nanny I would definitely have a harder time swallowing this one.

It sounds like you came to terms with what happened. And it really sounds like a one time ( with awful timing ) Occurrence .

[Anonymous]

I would not allow her to expect you to care for either child while you are working. That is not keeping things separate. Maybe not a firing offense this time, but there is no excuse for forgetting about a child left sleeping in a house alone. The child obviously noticed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Sorry for any confusion. There are times when the baby is napping where it's fine if she leaves with the older DS to get outside for a bit. She always texts me ahead of time to confirm it's okay. And if there are times when it's not going to work for my schedule (like today), I'm very clear about it so there isn't confusion about who is in charge or responsible for the baby.

I asked her this evening what happened, and she said she planned on only being outside with DS1 for 5 minutes and then just lost track of time.

She has been a solid caretaker for a couple years so I'm definitely just giving a pass on this. I was admittedly very frustrated when it happened though.

OP that doesn't sound right, or at least it doesn't jibe with your earlier explanation. You said that when you texted her she said "she was not at home". But "outside for 5 minutes" sounds like in the yard.

I think you need to mention this again and say that you need her to ask and get confirmation in the future to avoid this. I am a really relaxed MB but I would not let this one go with no conversation. She didn't even let you know she was leaving? And certainly didn't ask permission? Even after you *specifically* said you could not help out today. Something is not cool. Was she at least profusely sorry that this was her mistake?

If not, I'm kind of wondering what you have let you in the past that you are not telling us. Because if she has always been awesome and now this I would definitely go back to it because this was really different.

DS1 wanted to push a little doll stroller outside so she said she was planning on just being out with him for 5 minutes, and they ended up walking around the neighborhood and she lost track of time. She was sorry.

If I didn't have a track record of her being an awesome nanny I would definitely have a harder time swallowing this one.

I think you let it go OP. I wouldn't make a big deal of it. Especially if she has the awesome track record as you said. Now, if you weren't home and she left the sleeping baby that would be different. But it's not like your child was in any danger. I'm sure she realizes she messed up. She should have texted you, or taken the monitor with her and not gone too far from the house. She probably feels badly about the whole incident, I know I would.

MB PP here again. I agree and I wouldn't harp, but I do hope that text said "oh my gosh -- I'm so sorry -- we're not at home. coming back immediately." If it just said "we're not at home" that was a pretty major oversight that took her too long to realize.

Yes, I would probably let it go if she has been awesome for years. But I would probably think about a policy change to improve things going forward, like saying that you need to do a confirmation with her about going outside going forward so there is no more miscommunication. I have an amazing nanny and after mishaps (there really hasn't been anything major, just minor things like getting a date for an early start mixed up) we usually think about how to set things up to prevent them in the future.

[Anonymous]

You are turning this into a Federal case and your nanny is going to find another job. Mistakes happen. She has acknowledged her mistake. Let it go if you want your nanny to stay.

[Anonymous]

I think this can be easily rectified by just mentioning: "Hi, hope you had a nice weekend! I just wanted to touch base on something- please don't go out with DS1 when DS2 is napping upstairs (or vice versa). I can't take care of him, especially while I'm on these calls - I could have gotten in trouble with my boss." (something like this)

[Anonymous]

I think this can be easily rectified by just mentioning: "Hi, hope you had a nice weekend! I just wanted to touch base on something- please don't go out with DS1 when DS2 is napping upstairs (or vice versa). I can't take care of him, especially while I'm on these calls - I could have gotten in trouble with my boss." (something like this)

Correct---don't take on the nanny's duties as it appears she assumed she could rely on that. Better to do your job and require her to do hers.

[Anonymous]

This is a completely and totally appropriate reason to be frustrated. I've had the same thing happen while on a work call and our nanny left. If she would have asked before heading out that's one thing, but she just left. I truly can't even fathom an instance where this is appropriate without a discussion from her.

[Anonymous]

Let it go. Sounds like just an unlucky thing with timing for both of you.

[Anonymous]

I would have been so embarrassed about the cry during a call, understand the frustration. But step back and view it from nanny's POV. It's just bad timing she forgot this one time.