Another mom tried to poach my nanny at the park today!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about their interaction in the park makes the poacher even want to poach your nanny? I wouldn't necessarily gravitate to the non-English speaking nanny (and I speak Spanish.)

Op here. I'm not sure what it was! If I had to guess, maybe that DD is fully potty trained at 18 months and is super respectful (takes turns, says please and thank you) and is very verbal. I attribute all of this to the nanny. You can see and feel the warmth and connection between them, but yet the nanny is still very much in charge. But I'm just speculating based on the things I love, really.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
What about their interaction in the park makes the poacher even want to poach your nanny? I wouldn't necessarily gravitate to the non-English speaking nanny (and I speak Spanish.)


Op here. I'm not sure what it was! If I had to guess, maybe that DD is fully potty trained at 18 months and is super respectful (takes turns, says please and thank you) and is very verbal. I attribute all of this to the nanny. You can see and feel the warmth and connection between them, but yet the nanny is still very much in charge. But I'm just speculating based on the things I love, really.

That all sounds great. But if your child is "verbal," what language is she verbal in (since you said the nanny doesn't speak English)? This part might actually be you and your husband! Anyway, if there is an actual warmth and connection between them, maybe it won't be all about money for this nanny. So relax and don't be goaded into paying more than you are comfortable with.

[Anonymous]

Why have you given her two raises this year? Raises typically happen once a year at most.

[Anonymous]

Yes, this happened to DS' Nanny twice. Once she told us (the other mother was a little aggressive and she felt uncomfortable). The second, a friend who happened to be at the park overheard the exchange and told me.

Thankfully DS' Nanny is happy with us!

[Anonymous]

This happened to me before. I shouldve taken that job. Im disliking where I work, the parents are super lazy at parenting.

[Anonymous]

This happened to me a couple of times! It's quite flattering, I have to admit. But I love my current family and won't leave them until the kids go off to school. Now, if the poacher promised me a 50% salary increase, I would have to wonder what she was making up for with a salary so large... micromanaging and messiness, I'd assume.

[Anonymous]

I am a Nanny and find this kind of odd.

If someone asked me how much I made, that would be so invasive of them.
Then to offer 50% more is crazy!

No offense, but I think your Nanny is pulling the wool over your eyes.
If this truly happened, she should have kept it to herself.
If it did not, then I suspect she is hinting at wanting another raise.
Or she feels under appreciated and wants to indirectly let you know.

Or maybe something similar happened & she is embellishing the amount offered.

No decent Nanny would discuss their salary in public.

[Anonymous]

This hapened to me a lot. I actually got poached by a really good friend of my MBs.

[Anonymous]

I've had similar conversations at the park several times, usually with moms who are about to go back to work and asked for advice after seeing me do something with my charge(s). However, I'm always very blunt with them and my nf later. I don't consider prospective positions unless I have a firm end date, and I tell my nf only to be transparent (and because they have nosy friends who eavesdrop and gossip).

[Anonymous]

I have nannied for three families. The only times I have been approached by other moms was when I was with family number two. Those kids were just super happy, enthusiastic, and loving.
My time with family number three will come to an end next summer as they are moving. These days I am kind of wishing someone would approach me. But my current charges are older, well behaved, serious, rarely silly or laughing. I think the kids personalities have an affect on the impression other parents may have about the capabilities of the nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you see this happen.

Maybe she made up the story.... her way of asking for a raise?

I agree with you.