Mom watches cameras CONSTANTLY

[Anonymous]

I seriously doubt that the OP can get her MomBoss to back off even a little bit.

She can always try & ask.
But in these situations, trust is not something people like this cannot just snap out of.

[Anonymous]

*can

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've worked for a family for 4 months now and they have a 7 month old baby boy who I watch everyday. When I was first hired, they asked if I was comfortable with nanny cams, and MB stressed to me that she wouldn't be watching them often, just to check in and see the baby occasionally throughout her work day. I said that that was fine, and that having cameras for that purpose only (and of course to look back if there were an emergency) was okay with me. I hinted that I wasn't comfortable with being watched all day, and she made it clear that wasn't what she was going to do.

Fast forward a few months. She's a SAHM, and anytime I go into her office to chat with her, I see that she is watching the camera on one of her monitors with the volume all the way up. She does her work on one monitor, and on the other, she ALWAYS has the cameras on with the volume up. She comes running anytime he cries, and comments on things she saw throughout the day. Nothing critical, but things like "I saw DS crawling today with you!" And "Looks like he's pretty cranky, go ahead and put him down for a nap." I really like MB, she's really friendly and has been nothing but nice to me, but it makes me anxious knowing I'm being watched all day and that she can hear everything I'm saying. I don't have anything to hide, but this really annoys me because she doesn't seem to trust me, and also it's just not fun being watched all day. I feel scrutinized and like I can't do my job correctly.

How could I bring this up to MB? Clearly it's her right to watch the cameras whenever she wants, but I really feel like this is way too much. I've proven myself to be nothing but trustworthy.

We are in the same book my friend,don't worried,just relax and fart,hahaha...

[Anonymous]

'' DON'T WORRIED''


Jeez people, LEARN F ENGLISH!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She probably trusts you as much as she can trust anyone who's not herself or her husband.

I'm not a very trusting person and definitely checked the nanny cams a LOT the first year we had a nanny.

Just a hunch, but I doubt OP's employer trusts herself or her husband with the baby. She's insecure and paranoid, and needs a good therapist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Guys, like I said- I'm fine with there being cameras there. They would protect me in the case of something happening to the baby, like an injury that wasn't my fault. I'm glad they're there for that reason, and I was under the impression that they would be there only for that reason, and the occasional check-in. My problem is that this mom watches the cameras ALL day. The camera screen is open on her computer all day, on full volume. And she works from home. She's in the same house as us! Why does she need to watch us every minute I'm there, and comment on everything? I just want to do my own job, and use my own judgement. Does anyone else understand this or am I crazy?

Your original post said she is a SAHM. Does she work or SAH?

[Anonymous]

OP here- sorry, she's a WAHM, not a SAHM. Made a mistake in my original post.

[Anonymous]

Sound like you are not confident in your skills

[Anonymous]

Get a new job, OP, or you'll be sorry. Trust me.

[Anonymous]

This almost certainly isn't about you OP. Truly. This is about an insecure or anxious or guilt-ridden mom. And it sounds like you have a great attitude overall about the cameras so that is really lucky for her!

I think you should just keep in mind that a)hopefully she will relax in time, b) you can start planning some walks/picnics/library visits for storytime, etc... w/ the baby and that will help her get used to not having constant eyes on the child, and c) maybe you can build your relationship w/ her enough to gently say that you're concerned she doesn't trust you since you notice she has the camera on all the time.

But just start w/ reminding yourself that this really isn't about you. I bet she'd behave the same way no matter who is with the child. She probably drives her husband and family crazy also, but is hardest on herself (which is why she is trying to assuage her guilt by watching him and running to him all the time.)

- MB

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This almost certainly isn't about you OP. Truly. This is about an insecure or anxious or guilt-ridden mom. And it sounds like you have a great attitude overall about the cameras so that is really lucky for her!

I think you should just keep in mind that a)hopefully she will relax in time, b) you can start planning some walks/picnics/library visits for storytime, etc... w/ the baby and that will help her get used to not having constant eyes on the child, and c) maybe you can build your relationship w/ her enough to gently say that you're concerned she doesn't trust you since you notice she has the camera on all the time.

But just start w/ reminding yourself that this really isn't about you. I bet she'd behave the same way no matter who is with the child. She probably drives her husband and family crazy also, but is hardest on herself (which is why she is trying to assuage her guilt by watching him and running to him all the time.)

- MB

I don't think it's wise to encourage the nanny to tolerate the parent's mental health problems. Most nannies simply aren't equipped to take that on successfully.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This almost certainly isn't about you OP. Truly. This is about an insecure or anxious or guilt-ridden mom. And it sounds like you have a great attitude overall about the cameras so that is really lucky for her!

I think you should just keep in mind that a)hopefully she will relax in time, b) you can start planning some walks/picnics/library visits for storytime, etc... w/ the baby and that will help her get used to not having constant eyes on the child, and c) maybe you can build your relationship w/ her enough to gently say that you're concerned she doesn't trust you since you notice she has the camera on all the time.

But just start w/ reminding yourself that this really isn't about you. I bet she'd behave the same way no matter who is with the child. She probably drives her husband and family crazy also, but is hardest on herself (which is why she is trying to assuage her guilt by watching him and running to him all the time.)

- MB

I don't think it's wise to encourage the nanny to tolerate the parent's mental health problems. Most nannies simply aren't equipped to take that on successfully.

Oh for heaven's sake. She can find another job if she wants to, but she doesn't sound like she's there yet. But go ahead and leap to dramatic scenarios and reactions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every work place will b like that my dear.....cameras watching your every move. I wouldn't say quit your job because of this because this. Just suck it up and keep on keeping. Once she has complete trust in you she may do away with her gadgets.

Actually, "my dear," many workplaces do not have constant surveillance and zero of my nanny positions have had anything like what OP describes. One of he perks of nannying in a private home is being able to select a family that values autonomy and privacy, which OP thought she had donr.

To OP: I suggest asking what you can do to help her trust you. Basically you want to put her in the position of having to explain why she needs these cameras constantly on. Either she will realize she is being crazy and tone it down or she won't and you will know where you stand.

Actually, Dear, most workplaces have them if you look up from businesses, to restaurants and other professional jobs. Anywhere you go, there are probably cameras. Its life now. Its about the child's safety and if there is something you need to keep private, you should not be caring for aa child.

Ive been employed as a nanny and babysitter for over 10 different families, two were live-in positions. While its true that most businesses such as restaurants, stores, boutiques will have cameras in place for security reasons, MOST families who hire nannies dont have nanny cams. I have only had one family tell me they had nanny cams in two of the main rooms and ask me if I was comfortable with that. I ended up not working with that family, one of the reasons being the cameras. Like the poster stated, I have nothing to hide. Im a nanny who takes my job seriously and professionally. If you decide to trust me with your child, trust me. If theres ever any evidence that shows you shouldnt trust me, please by all means let me know or terminate me if you feel so inclined. I definitely would not feel comfortable knowing someone could watch me and hear me at any given time. If it were a daycare or a school or business, thats something different. Its a larger capacity of children at one time with several people watching over them who dont get as much one on one time and care like a nanny or au pair provides. Thats the beauty of working privately with a family. Most people treat their nannies as an extension of the family; at least thats how ive always been treated.