Am I way overthinking this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, you are overthinking.

But it might be that they do actually value some things that seem unimportant to you, and don't value as much some things that seem more important to you (like the food from scratch issue).

But presumably they are first time parents right? And they have twins?

Then as a twin mom I can assure that the most important things they need are the flexibility they talk about, and reliability.

So take them at their word, continue to build a good working relationship with them, and try not to overthink.

Thanks. This is helpful.

Criticisms are in the vein of things like asking me to fold clothes differently, asking me to label any time I move thing from one drawer to another (e.g., had to move blankets to the bottom dresser drawer to make room when rotating in larger clothes). I (almost) never make the same mistake twice, but in general they seem to be very specific and want things according to their system and I feel like I am not always on top of details the way the parents are. I work 45 hours a week and make $20 per hour.

It would super annoy me if a nanny took this type of feedback personally. You are taking things too personally, OP.

[Anonymous]

Don't look at their comments as criticisms but rather as instructions. They are telling you specifically what they would like you to do if it is important to them. Otherwise, they let it go. Flexibility and reliability are the most important things to me, besides treating my children well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't look at their comments as criticisms but rather as instructions. They are telling you specifically what they would like you to do if it is important to them. Otherwise, they let it go. Flexibility and reliability are the most important things to me, besides treating my children well.

Yes, the things you are describing aren't "mistakes" or "constructive criticism," in my opinion. They are personal choices about how they'd like their house set up, which you can't be expected to know unless they tell you. If I hire someone to do my laundry, it might not occur to me to tell them to do something a certain way until I see that the person does it a different way, which I don't like as much. It's not a criticism, it's just a preference that you didn't know about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, you are overthinking.

But it might be that they do actually value some things that seem unimportant to you, and don't value as much some things that seem more important to you (like the food from scratch issue).

But presumably they are first time parents right? And they have twins?

Then as a twin mom I can assure that the most important things they need are the flexibility they talk about, and reliability.

So take them at their word, continue to build a good working relationship with them, and try not to overthink.

Thanks. This is helpful.

Criticisms are in the vein of things like asking me to fold clothes differently, asking me to label any time I move thing from one drawer to another (e.g., had to move blankets to the bottom dresser drawer to make room when rotating in larger clothes). I (almost) never make the same mistake twice, but in general they seem to be very specific and want things according to their system and I feel like I am not always on top of details the way the parents are. I work 45 hours a week and make $20 per hour.

Sorry, it does sound like criticism, but they also sound like overbearing nitpickers. I would ask for a meeting and let them know that I needed a concise list of every little thing that they want done, that way I wouldn't constantly be told I was doing things wrong. If that meant that they needed to draw up a 10 page document so that I could "learn" to do things their way, so be it. Their other alternative is to let me do things the way I do them and be happy that their child is happy, safe, and learning, and that their home is in better condition when I am off for the day than when I started. There's no way that I would put up with 6 months with 203 days per week with nitpicking. I'm not a doormat, I'm a person willing to work within guidelines if I'm given clear instructions, a little bit of leeway and nothing I would be asked is detrimental to me or the child.