My nanny is incompetent
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Anonymous
| I feel sorry for the nanny and the baby. Nanny can get another job, but that poor child is stuck. |
Anonymous
Where do you live, OP? |
Anonymous
Ask your friend if you can ask her nanny to give you a few consultation hours. Double her regular rates to come in a on the weekend for you. |
Anonymous
I agree too. |
Anonymous
I think so too. |
Anonymous
| Some children never sleep through the night ever |
Anonymous
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Please PLEASE someone admit to writing a false posting. PLEASE!
This cannot be real. Okay, I'll bite since Halloween is coming up soon. OP, in all honesty as both a mother and a nanny, it is a waste of time to try to get a ten-wk old infant to adhere to any sort of schedule. At this age, they need to be fed, changed and sleep basically on demand. They are much too young to be living by a strict schedule. This is obviously your first child. Your nanny actually sounds much more competent than you do. If you let her go, you will be doing her the best favor. |
Anonymous
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Schedules for infants this young are usually done for selfish reasons.
After reading your post OP, it looks as if you want your baby to adhere to make your life much easier. Nothing is ever easier once a newborn enters your world. Remember this. |
Anonymous
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Sorry people are piling on you 0P. I think that this could go one of two ways. We are really clear on what exactly it is that you are expecting from your nanny. It is possible that you were looking for skills that one would find more with a newborn care specialist. Newborn care specialists absolutely work to get infants on a good routine and educate parents on how to establish a routine and build a schedule. That said, at this age they should not be on a strict schedule, but more of a routine it gives you a rough idea of when things will happen while still being very flexible and responsive to babies needs. They should be able to feed on demand at this age. I am not sure what it is exactly that is going on with you and your nanny without hearing both sides of it, but rather than declaring her incompetent I think you need to focus on figuring out what it is that you truly want from her (a daytime nanny can reasonably be expected to work on getting your child into a flexible routine that gives you a little bit of predictability well still being responsive to the baby) and what you need to provide (overnight sleep is not something that she can help with, unless you are willing and she is willing to hire her for 24 hour care for a few days so that she can see what you are currently doing and give feedback on how to structure that)
Frankly the level of negativity you were just playing here leads me to believe that even if your nanny is competent, she is likely not going to be doing very much towards educating you because she can tell that you are not open to more receptive to her ideas and approaches. It is entirely possible that she is coming at this from a very different angle than you and that the two of you are simply not compatible. If you really want someone who can focus on routine/scheduling/sleep training at this young age, then you really need a newborn care specialist, and after you hire that person, you need to actually listen to what they have to say and treat them like the experienced professional that they are. If you are not going to be willing to listen to a nanny or a newborn care specialist tell you that your 10 week old should not be sleeping through the night yet, then you are going to have to figure out how to make that work on your own. |
Anonymous
| Op, what are you paying your "incompetent" nanny? |
Anonymous
| No way is this teal. If so, this mom has a head full of rocks. |
Anonymous
| You are the one who is incompetent as well as brings dreadful mother. Be grateful for this nanny as, at least, this infant has one person who knows what they are doing! |
nannydebsays
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OP, You need to address several things to ensure you can make your baby accept the schedule you prefer her to be on. First, take her to the Pediatrician and ask if she is healthy enough/weighs enough to be sleep trained. If the answer is yes, then your next step is to determine how much formula/breat milk she needs during a 24 hour period (midnight to midnight). The general formula is 2 - 2.5 oz per pound of body weight, but follow the info your Dr. gives you. Then, if you want to help baby learn to STTN, you work on dropping night feeds first, then on pushing back her morning wake time. You also need black out curtains and a sound machine. The first thing you need to do is be willing to accept some crying. Babies cry to communicate, and if you are choosing to postpone meeting baby's needs in order to change her schedule, there will be crying. Some babies cry so hard they vomit. Choose when you expect your baby to wake up in the morning - let's say 7 am as an example. Night feeds. Look at when baby wakes up to eat for about 1 week. You might see a pattern like feeding around midnight then again at 3:30. Push midnight feed back by 1/2 hour every 3 days or so. Patient people often wait a week before making another change. In addition, push the early am feed back by 30 minute as well. Do this gradual shift until baby is waking only for one feed in the early AM. Later wake up time. Push back the early am feed until baby is being given her bottle within 30 minutes after her acceptable wake time. Nighttime schedule: Baby in bed at 7pm after 6:30 feed. Wakes to feed at midnight and left to cry until 12:30 before feeding. Wakes to feed at 3:30 and left to cry until 4 before feeding - continue for a week. Week 2, feed at 1 am and 4:30 am, regardless of when baby wakes and is hungry. If baby is left to cry from hunger for more than an hour, you will likely be cleaning up her vomit. Week 3, feed at 1:30 and 5 Week 4, feed at 2 and 5:30 Week 5, feed at 2:30 and 6 - back in bed after 6am feed until 7, then feed at 7:30 Week 6, feed at 3 and 6:30 - back in bed until 7:30, skip that feed and feed by 9:30, then 1, then 4. Week 7, feed at 3:30 and then get baby to start the day at 7, feed at 7:30, 10:30, 1:30, 4, and 6:30 Week 8, feed at 4 Week 9, feed at 4:30 Week 10, feed at 5 Week 11, feed at 5:30 Week 12, feed at 6 Week 13, feed at 6:30 Week 14, feed at 7:30 And that's how you make sure your baby does what you want and allows you to get the sleep you need. Of course, if you choose to hurry the solution, change times every 3 days and it will take just 6 weeks to make baby realize that she will not be responded to when she cries from hunger until YOU, the parent, choose to allow her to eat. The other solutions are to hire a night nanny or NCS and let them do the night feeds, or to do some reading and realize that your baby is not a tiny doll who only has needs when you want to play with her. Parenting sucks on occasion, and newborn care is HARD. But that phase does end, and baby will STTN. Your choice is whether to force the issue and cope with baby wailing and vomiting, or to rise to the challenge and work to gently help your baby learn good sleep habits that will last her for a lifetime. Good luck to your baby. P.S. A 15 week old is 50% OLDER than your baby. That's like expecting a 4 year old and a 6 year old to be on the exact same developmental track. It's not going to happen. |
Anonymous
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Anonymous
What did you decide, Op? |