I think I made my Nanny mad?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just apologize. Probably should have told her earlier but it's just one time. Lots of entitled nannies in this area and I assume to be fair there's a lot of mistreatment but come on, it's a job and jobs sometimes require late nights.

New poster. The only one who is entitled here is MB. She admitted this is not the first time she has texted nanny with a last minute schedule change after 10pm! That is insane! The most damning evidence? MB says "I have [done it before] but I honestly don't think it's a big deal." Seriously??

I'm also going to assume that since OP asked nanny to come in later to offset staying later that she received no additional compensation for the schedule change, is that accurate? Can you possibly try to get your head out of your ass, OP, and imagine how YOU would feel if your boss texted you after 10pm to say "please come in an hour later and stay an hour later, for no additional money." ??? What if you had obligations after work? I often go to a gym right after work where you have to reserve your time and if you cancel with less than 24 hours notice you still pay for the time slot. What would you do if your nanny said "I'm sorry, I can't accommodate this request because of previous commitments."??

I'm sorry I've got my panties all twisted up, but you see, I was previously a victim of such a self absorbed MB who did this exact thing to me ALL THE TIME. At least once, often twice per week she would text me, sometimes as late as 11pm. My normal schedule was 8-5; half the late night texts would say "please come in early at 7" and the other half would say random things like "please stay two hours late tomorrow" or "I only need you from 12-4 tomorrow," and this was before I knew enough about contracts to ask for things like guaranteed hours, which I didn't get, and I was never paid overtime rates either. Looking back, I think SHE knew at least about the law regarding OT, but chose not to pay me for it anyway. Once or twice I told her I couldn't stay late due to conflicts and she chewed me out every time and threatened to fire me. When I'd finally had enough and quit, she said to me "after all I've done for you!" Snort. Right.

You might not be quite as bad as that MB, OP, but the flippant way you've posed everything; clearly not giving a shit about your nanny or her personal life at all, and even going so far as to say that YOU are the one who is annoyed (!) makes me think that you're every ounce as entitled, selfish, and downright shitty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is NO big deal and it isn't as if you do it all the time. We all get annoyed when asked to stay late - it's life. I would just apologize for late notice. Frankly this is why I have a nanny - more flexible as necessary.

No 10:00 pm, you don't!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You texted her after 10 pm for a change the next morning? Yeah, I'd probably be annoyed about that too. My ringer goes off around 8. Depending on how much I liked you and how often you do this type of thing and how generous you are or aren't in general would dictate my loved of pissed offness and how quickly I moved on. Seriously OP get it together and figure your life out at least a week In advance.

This is utter bullshit. Nannies have the jobs they do in this area in large part because many professionals have the types of jobs that are not always conducive to week-in-advance planning. OP, your nanny is acting like a baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is NO big deal and it isn't as if you do it all the time. We all get annoyed when asked to stay late - it's life. I would just apologize for late notice. Frankly this is why I have a nanny - more flexible as necessary.

No 10:00 pm, you don't!

Flexibility, of course, I understanding that's part of my job. Fielding your texts after 10pm on a weeknight on multiple occasions? No. I have a life outside of my job. I had an MB who would constantly text at night and on the weekends and it was so tiresome, she assumed I was chained to my phone and would get annoyed when I would just respond with "ok" or didn't respond at all (because I actually don't have my phone on me 24/7). it's just plain rude

[Anonymous]

If you want a job where you arrive exactly the same time and leave exactly the same time, work at McDonalds. Jobs that pay above minimum wage require some flexibility. Should have texted before 10 pm, yes. Staying late thing. What's the problem!?!! Geez.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you want a job where you arrive exactly the same time and leave exactly the same time, work at McDonalds. Jobs that pay above minimum wage require some flexibility. Should have texted before 10 pm, yes. Staying late thing. What's the problem!?!! Geez.

Spoken like someone who has never worked at McDonalds Flexibility does not mean you have the freedom to change my schedule at will with little to no notice. OP's nanny may not have even seen the text until this morning, which I doubt was phrased as a polite request, and she was forced to rearrange her life at the last minute for no extra compensation. If by flexibility you mean 24/7 availability for communication and schedule changes, you better be paying quite a bit more than minimum wage. Funny thing is, in my experience, its the entitled MBs who want the world for $15/hour.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You texted her after 10 pm for a change the next morning? Yeah, I'd probably be annoyed about that too. My ringer goes off around 8. Depending on how much I liked you and how often you do this type of thing and how generous you are or aren't in general would dictate my loved of pissed offness and how quickly I moved on. Seriously OP get it together and figure your life out at least a week In advance.

This is utter bullshit. Nannies have the jobs they do in this area in large part because many professionals have the types of jobs that are not always conducive to week-in-advance planning. OP, your nanny is acting like a baby.

10 pm for a schedule change the FOLLOWING MORNING is unacceptable by any standards unless you're paying for on call availability. Emergencies come up and most nannies will gladly handle them, but in OPs case that is not the reason.

[Anonymous]

OP, you need to have an iota of respect for your nanny's time. Texting someone at 10pm, about work tomorrow, and expecting a reply that same night is ridiculous. Having to stay late after work, is part of the job. Your flippant attitude is what needs to be checked.

[Anonymous]

I'm a tad bit confused here OP.

So...You meant to say that you had a time change for today, yet didn't get around to letting her know until after ten o'clock last evening? That is super last minute + she probably felt slighted like she was an afterthought.

That being said, you are only human and as long as this doesn't occur often, then she shouldn't stay mad for too long.

Open communication is vital to any nanny/parent relationship so I advise you to bring up the issue NOW rather than let it fester itself.

Simply apologize to her, letting her know you acknowledge what you did was inconvenient for her and that you will make sure in the future it doesn't happen again.

She should be relieved you apologized and forgive you for it.

It's always best to address the "Elephant in the Room" sooner rather than later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm getting a vibe from my nanny that she's mad and it's annoying me. I forgot to text her about the schedule change so I ended up texting her after ten pm. She didn't answer until the morning. However I didn't see her response until two hours later. When I did she responded with "K." She hasn't been very chatty this afternoon and most of her answers are short. My coworker thinks it's because I texted her after 10pm. Then she asked if I had done it before. I have but I honestly don't think it's a big deal. Should I bring it up?

Yes. You need to apologize. You knew about the schedule change but didn't bother to let your nanny know until after 10 pm. This is not the first time you have done this. Get your shit together and start respecting her time.

[Anonymous]

What does your contract say? Do you pay extra to have her answer you 24 hours a day and have great flexibility including being awoken at night for a schedule change (what if you had needed her an hour earlier and she hadn't seen it?) If so, tough for her, she signed up for it. If not, apologize and cut it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are paying her for the extra hour, aren't you?

OP?

[Anonymous]

And this is why in my contract my hours are set and if you want me to come in later and say later, you will pay for me to stay later.