Do you talk to you nanny about behavior or just look for someone else?

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks again. the respinses have been great and I have something's to talk over with my husband.

Also-I did not mean to imply that I am tardy in coming home. I just meant that sometimes due to a late meeting a work; I could ask her on Monday to please stay late on Thursday because I have Xyz . (Of course I would pay her for that time)
Has this happened a lot? Probably, 10 times in the last year. So, not a huge deal. However, I dont have ghat option anymore and I have to accommodate on my end.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks again. the respinses have been great and I have something's to talk over with my husband.

Also-I did not mean to imply that I am tardy in coming home. I just meant that sometimes due to a late meeting a work; I could ask her on Monday to please stay late on Thursday because I have Xyz . (Of course I would pay her for that time)
Has this happened a lot? Probably, 10 times in the last year. So, not a huge deal. However, I dont have ghat option anymore and I have to accommodate on my end.

[Anonymous]

Following on one of the last responses that recommended being ready to fire her, do what you can to find someone else or line up backup care ASAP.

Also, I would have two plans: one for if the conversation goes badly and she quits / you fire her, and one for if it goes well, and you work out revised accommodation through the end of the semester. Remember when all of her work is due for school, at the end of the semester, she is probably going to be completely MIA so you may want to keep her on til early April and be ready to let her go then. Right Now you are just seeing the impact of sheer school attendance and increased socializing.

[Anonymous]

It seems like she has been talking to someone who has been influencing her about the job. If she seems the type who is approachable and seemingly down to earth, you can talk to her first about how you feel and see how she responds to you.

However if you do not feel comfortable at all in doing so based on personality differences or she doesn't respond in the manner you had hoped, then by all means I would start a new nanny search.

You need and deserve a nanny who puts you and your children very high up on her priority list with no exceptions whatsoever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OMG! What a horrible person. She has the audacity to put her needs, dreams, and desires above her betters. Bad, bad, bad nanny. Fire her so she can find a job working for decent people.

Who said she was a horrible person for wanting to get an education? The problem is that she accepted a JOB. She made a commitment to this family and is now going back on that. Do you not get that?

[Anonymous]

The problem is this nanny and family are no longer a good fit.

Nanny has every right to move forward with her life.

OP has every right to want a nanny who has more or less a completely open schedule.

[Anonymous]

Nanny needs to be better at managing her time and studying.

I'm lucky that I have employers that are very encouraging of me being in school, and my class schedule has never been an issue.

However, it is my responsibility to find time to study and not expect a week of from work to study.

She seems a little naive when it comes to time management.

I'm confused why she would ask you for gas money unless you were previously financing her for private use.

You do not have to approve her additional vacation time.

I also don't think you need to go right to firing her or finding a replacement.

I would talk with her about your concerns. I wouldn't tell her that you no longer feel like her priority.

I would discuss flexibility both yours and hers and if they are currently compatible.

[Anonymous]

I agree with these posts. I am a nanny furthering my education. I work 40-45 hour weeks. I always make sure I can accommodate my employer's schedules. School is a top priority but so is my job. I have never asked to leave early or for extra vacation. I have been let go early some days but that is rare and appreciated.

She seems like she is no longer a good fit. She seems to be taking you for granted. I would talk with her, but replace her if the issues aren't resolved. She needs to learn how to balance work and school.