Nanny quit by text, no notice after 1.5 years

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think there is something massively wrong in her personal life and she just can't deal. Perhaps a death in her family, or someone has cancer, or her boyfriend is a real jerk, or whatever. But I'd stop going through everything you've ever said to her searching for where you went wrong. I know that's hard, because some people (and I'd include myself in this) tend to do that when we are in a relationship and something goes wrong.

Good luck searching for a new nanny!

yes, this is me, too. Thank you for the reminder not to do this !

[Anonymous]

Maybe your husband inadvertently said something that upset her. She's young and may not understand nuance as well or may not take criticism well or who knows. IME you get a lot more information out of the husband's than the wives and sometimes the husbands are dolts with the things they say.

Maybe there was a death in the family. Maybe she's pregnant. Maybe her boyfriend broke up with her. Maybe she googled your name and found something disturbing about someone who shares your name.

The possibilities are endless and you'll drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out. You may hear from her down the road, or like DB Cooper, or may remain a mystery.

[Anonymous]

I am a nanny.

This is ridiculously unprofessional. No matter what happened she owes you an explanation and a two weeks notice. Unless something happened in the workplace that would make her fearful for her safety, she owes it to you.

I'm sorry OP, I suggest hiring an older nanny.

[Anonymous]

We don't know the real truth so stop judging the nanny.

[Anonymous]

We don't know the real truth so stop judging the nanny.

[Anonymous]

OP here, thank you for all of your responses. I will probably never know what happened, and will hopefully not take this awful ending out on our new nanny , whoever she may be.

I can only control my actions and reactions and know I acted as the adult with a phone call, and treated her like the great employee and support for my children that we thought she was , so our consciences are clean today and we will move on.
I just wish I wasn't so hurt, but time will help with that as it tends to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, thank you for all of your responses. I will probably never know what happened, and will hopefully not take this awful ending out on our new nanny , whoever she may be.

I can only control my actions and reactions and know I acted as the adult with a phone call, and treated her like the great employee and support for my children that we thought she was , so our consciences are clean today and we will move on.
I just wish I wasn't so hurt, but time will help with that as it tends to do.

I would highly suggest you NOT take this out on your new nanny - which would be a ridiculous thing to do...and may explain why your old nanny left in the manner that she did if that is the type of person you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, thank you for all of your responses. I will probably never know what happened, and will hopefully not take this awful ending out on our new nanny , whoever she may be.

I can only control my actions and reactions and know I acted as the adult with a phone call, and treated her like the great employee and support for my children that we thought she was , so our consciences are clean today and we will move on.
I just wish I wasn't so hurt, but time will help with that as it tends to do.

I would highly suggest you NOT take this out on your new nanny - which would be a ridiculous thing to do...and may explain why your old nanny left in the manner that she did if that is the type of person you are.

????

[Anonymous]

As a nanny seeking employment, it would be a huge red flag if a potential new family confided in me during an interview that their former nanny quit via text after a year and a half so suddenly and without reason.

I wouldn't take the position unless they let me talk to the former nanny personally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a nanny seeking employment, it would be a huge red flag if a potential new family confided in me during an interview that their former nanny quit via text after a year and a half so suddenly and without reason.

I wouldn't take the position unless they let me talk to the former nanny personally.

I don't see why they would ever mention this to a potential new nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a nanny seeking employment, it would be a huge red flag if a potential new family confided in me during an interview that their former nanny quit via text after a year and a half so suddenly and without reason.

I wouldn't take the position unless they let me talk to the former nanny personally.

I don't see why they would ever mention this to a potential new nanny.

Any smart nanny will ask about any former employees they may have had (in the same way we are asked about former employers) and how/why that relationship ended. Of course OP could lie, but if the question clusters her, and she seems unwilling to provide the reference, it will definitely turn off candidates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a nanny seeking employment, it would be a huge red flag if a potential new family confided in me during an interview that their former nanny quit via text after a year and a half so suddenly and without reason.

I wouldn't take the position unless they let me talk to the former nanny personally.

I don't see why they would ever mention this to a potential new nanny.

Any smart nanny will ask about any former employees they may have had (in the same way we are asked about former employers) and how/why that relationship ended. Of course OP could lie, but if the question clusters her, and she seems unwilling to provide the reference, it will definitely turn off candidates.

OP here, interesting point, and thank you . I would not lie and of course provide the contact information . Maybe that will be how I will find out what happened ? Thank you for letting me know that may come up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe your husband inadvertently said something that upset her. She's young and may not understand nuance as well or may not take criticism well or who knows. IME you get a lot more information out of the husband's than the wives and sometimes the husbands are dolts with the things they say.

Maybe there was a death in the family. Maybe she's pregnant. Maybe her boyfriend broke up with her. Maybe she googled your name and found something disturbing about someone who shares your name.

The possibilities are endless and you'll drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out. You may hear from her down the road, or like DB Cooper, or may remain a mystery.

This. Husband ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a nanny seeking employment, it would be a huge red flag if a potential new family confided in me during an interview that their former nanny quit via text after a year and a half so suddenly and without reason.

I wouldn't take the position unless they let me talk to the former nanny personally.

I don't see why they would ever mention this to a potential new nanny.

Any smart nanny will ask about any former employees they may have had (in the same way we are asked about former employers) and how/why that relationship ended. Of course OP could lie, but if the question clusters her, and she seems unwilling to provide the reference, it will definitely turn off candidates.

OP here, interesting point, and thank you . I would not lie and of course provide the contact information . Maybe that will be how I will find out what happened ? Thank you for letting me know that may come up.

What makes you think that your former nanny will want her contact information given out to strangers? She's not even responding to you--why would she want to talk about why she left to complete strangers! Ridiculous suggestion.

[Anonymous]

As a nanny I always ask about previous caregivers, and if I may speak with them.

Believe it or not I learn a lot from this.

In your case OP I would be ok knowing that things ended suddenly and though you have try to reach out to nanny she's not responded

I wouldn't expect her contact info.

If you have other caregiver references and the fact she stayed 1.5 years in your favor.

Good luck.