Nannies - do you pretend your charges are your own when out and about?

[Anonymous]

Sounds like a serious bad lifetime movie!

I would fire immediately. She seems very unstable to make up elaborate lies about having kids and a husband. My charge happens to look a great deal like me. We got to classes and the park daily. Some will say " how old is your baby". I always answer " She is X months but I'm her nanny, not her parent". If in passing and someone says she is cute I just say " thank you". I've offered that I was my charges nanny and many are surprised as she looks a lot like me and I care for her " like I'm her mother". Honestly it's really creepy and I would never assume my employers name, claim my charge as my own, or make up my boss as my husband. FIRE, FIRE, FIRE! No talking will help now nor would I give this nanny any chance to redeem herself. She has already crossed too many barriers and lines.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Even if it's a troll it's something to comment on. Some troll posts are the best to read and most entertaining.

Why do people hate troll posts? Without them there would be very little to read on dcum

There are a few problems with troll posts.

1. They paint a false picture of the nanny/MB experience. Newcomers here might actually believe the insane claims of a troll post and either decline to hire a nanny or be totally paranoid about their nannies. This damages both nannies and families.

2. They lie about important things about rates, duties and compensation packages, which can unfairly exploit both nannies and families.

3. They manipulate people. Posters read about some crazy troll situation and they feel bad about a situation they don't know is fake. So they spend time and energy researching or thinking of great advice...only to be played by a troll. That's mean and destroys the credibility of anyone with a real problem. I don't even take seriously any of the postings here because they are so often trolls and I'm so disgusted by how they reflect on the nanny profession that I would never hire a nanny from here.

4. Very few MBs actually post here. Nannies always post outlandish stories and call themselves MBs, thus giving the nannies here another way to bully each other and any potential family that might make the mistake of coming here for actual, thoughtful feedback.

Trolls are mean, mean girls who exist merely to cause trouble. That's the problem with troll posts.

[Anonymous]

Just to roll with the bad lifetime movie idea, is it concievable that it all started with little white lie because of the disclaimer or waiver or such.

"Oh, hi, Mrs Johnson, we don't have Laila's signed waiver? Would you please sing here and here, otherwise Laila can't participate"... Nanny thinks if she says something, Laula can't be in the class, so she rolls with it... After this it is no going back, so you just have to put one lie on top of another.

My mom has pretty hard time understanding English over the phone (it is not her native language). I had to help her many times by calling different companies and pretending to be her (at her request, of course). One company that my mon uses is so used to my voice, that if my mom calls them they would claim she is a fraud. It just happened. They just know me as my mom there. I can't really change it now, though I feel bad about it.

I don't know if OP already fired the nanny, but I'd at least ask her to explain herself before firing. At least there must be a good story

[Anonymous]

LA nanny here- I work for celebrities so yes I do pretend the kids are mine for safety reasons, but I don't impersonate the parents or any of that other craziness. I just don't let people know I'm the nanny.

[Anonymous]

LA nanny again- The parents actually ask me to do that

[Anonymous]

In response to the question about why my Nanny works on a Sunday, I am in Australia and it was already monday midday when I posted.

Given Australia's labor laws I needed to look into if it would be as simple as just firing her on the spot. We ended up giving her the equivalent of 4 weeks pay and giving her notice last night. Every last question I posed to her was denied. I knew we couldn't move forward without trust or even a shadow of a doubt.

I honestly believe that it all began innocently, I believe that she was enjoying being part of a group of mothers and was creating a fantasy for herself. When I first posted I was doubting myself feeling like it wasn't normal and just wanted to ask other Nannies because perhaps it is considered normal to some.

We are all left feeling sad. Including our Nanny.

[Anonymous]

I don't believe you're Australian, if you were you would have spelled it 'labour'.

[Anonymous]

Good for you OP. Sorry you have to find a new nanny. And to the PP - maybe the OP is from the US and just living in Australia thereby using the American spelling of labor.

[Anonymous]

Thanks to the PP for the nice response. I am actually Australian and my spelling was corrected to 'Labor' so I left it as I am aware this is an American website.

I took my daughter to swimming today which our Nanny had taken her to in the past and the teacher and some other Mothers knew she was my daughters Nanny.

I do hope that I've got this right. I feel quite sick about it all.

[Anonymous]

Please fire her she's is crazy!!nanny have to have some respect for the families,they paid you a salary for taking care of the kids,I am a nanny as well.

[Anonymous]

No. That is super creepy and a red flag.

I don't go out of my way to explain I am their nanny all the time.

If I get a, "They are beautiful girls." I smile and say thank you.

If a comment is directly made about me being the mom I correct them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just to roll with the bad lifetime movie idea, is it concievable that it all started with little white lie because of the disclaimer or waiver or such.

"Oh, hi, Mrs Johnson, we don't have Laila's signed waiver? Would you please sing here and here, otherwise Laila can't participate"... Nanny thinks if she says something, Laula can't be in the class, so she rolls with it... After this it is no going back, so you just have to put one lie on top of another.

My mom has pretty hard time understanding English over the phone (it is not her native language). I had to help her many times by calling different companies and pretending to be her (at her request, of course). One company that my mon uses is so used to my voice, that if my mom calls them they would claim she is a fraud. It just happened. They just know me as my mom there. I can't really change it now, though I feel bad about it.

I don't know if OP already fired the nanny, but I'd at least ask her to explain herself before firing. At least there must be a good story

This is plot of a movie on Lifetime but instead of a nanny it's the surrogate.

[Anonymous]

La nanny... Who have you worked for? Curious minds want to know! Not sure you can spill much...

[Anonymous]

I have always been asked if I am childrens MOm because I speak English fluently, look good, smell good, dress good, and I always say no Im the proud nanny of this beutiful child, parents children that are appy with their nannies act natural so people think its the nannies kid

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi all, I am a mother of a beautiful 8 month old baby girl. We had a Nanny come on board to help us out 2 days per week when my daughter was 4 months old while my husband and I are at work. She has been wonderful and I have been nothing but pleasantly surprised by her.

One thing I was just wondering though if what I experienced this morning is normal. Our Nanny called in with car trouble this morning which was no big deal and I told her to take the day to sort it out and I called into work and took the day off. Our Nanny takes our daughter to a baby music class each week and on the phone she was almost insisting we skip it this week for various reasons but I couldn't see any reason not to go, so I went.

Anyway, very long story short it appears that our Nanny has been telling serious lies to this group of mothers. At first it was very awkward as I had to explain myself a few times because our Nanny had been answering to my name and introducing herself as me the entire term. I had paid online for the class so had given my name which apparently all these mothers were calling her for weeks.

Apparently she has been using my husbands name as her husband, saying she has 3 other children at school and that she lives in our suburb etc etc she told these mother all these stories about her family and even got into details about her 4 births!

I can fully understand if someone makes a comment in passing then maybe you wont explain that you are the childs Nanny but to go to these lengths?

My husband is really angry about it and says I must call her and discuss.

Do Nannies do this? Is it normal?

This is beyond bizarre and very Hand that Rocks the Cradle. Fire her immediately. Document everything in case you need a restraining order. I'm a nanny and a parent.