Snow day. Is your live-in nanny working?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I ended up asking her to work starting in the afternoon, basically so I could shovel snow and to help me clean up the toys that were everywhere by the evening. I'm grateful for the feedback.

Sounds like a good compromise.

[Anonymous]

I don't even see the issue. Isn't that one of the perks of having live in??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some of you don't seem to realize that if you're home, it's damn near impossible for a nanny to do her job. With every little squeal from your kid, you come running to reward that behavior. What's the point? If anything, it may result in your having to find yet another nanny.

Few parents can afford to pay a nanny enough to put up with that.

Look, we get it. You have worked for some shitty families but I'm sure you can understand that not ALL families are like that. Just like not ALL nannies are the same. I worked for a SAHM for a year and it was actually a great experience.

good for you but this ISN'T the norm.

[Anonymous]

As a live in nanny I only work when the parents work. If they come home early or have a snow day I'm off. This has been my experience with all my jobs. The patents enjoy time with the kids.

[Anonymous]

Am I the only MB that has to do the same work on snow days--just from home? I mean, so much of work is now via email that it really makes no difference. So long as we have power, I have to work. Try doing that AND looking after the kids- not fun! I would really not even be in a position to give the live-in nanny a snow day--would make no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only MB that has to do the same work on snow days--just from home? I mean, so much of work is now via email that it really makes no difference. So long as we have power, I have to work. Try doing that AND looking after the kids- not fun! I would really not even be in a position to give the live-in nanny a snow day--would make no sense.

No - you're not. The same is true for me and my husband. So we can both be at home on snow days but still be expected to be available for conference calls, working online, etc... Unless we've lost power we both have employers that expect us to work or take vacation time. So our nanny stays over if bad weather is predicted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only MB that has to do the same work on snow days--just from home? I mean, so much of work is now via email that it really makes no difference. So long as we have power, I have to work. Try doing that AND looking after the kids- not fun! I would really not even be in a position to give the live-in nanny a snow day--would make no sense.

No - you're not. The same is true for me and my husband. So we can both be at home on snow days but still be expected to be available for conference calls, working online, etc... Unless we've lost power we both have employers that expect us to work or take vacation time. So our nanny stays over if bad weather is predicted.

Your situation makes sense. OP however did not have to work. If you're also not working, and you asked your live-in to work anyway, it comes across a little bit like milking her for every dime. If this is a rare occurrence, and OP needed to actually get things done (ie. she wasn't sitting in bed watching TV while nanny dealt with the kids), it would be fine. Its when you make a habit of milking your nanny for everything you can get that breeds ill feelings. If this has been happening all winter, and OP is also the type to make her nanny work holidays that she has off, and she makes her nanny "earn her keep" while they travel, and so on and so forth, then yeah, that's going to piss your nanny off, even if "that's why you have a live in". Its human nature. No one likes working while others sit idle. It doesn't sound like that is the case here, and OP seemed to find a fair compromise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only MB that has to do the same work on snow days--just from home? I mean, so much of work is now via email that it really makes no difference. So long as we have power, I have to work. Try doing that AND looking after the kids- not fun! I would really not even be in a position to give the live-in nanny a snow day--would make no sense.

No - you're not. The same is true for me and my husband. So we can both be at home on snow days but still be expected to be available for conference calls, working online, etc... Unless we've lost power we both have employers that expect us to work or take vacation time. So our nanny stays over if bad weather is predicted.

Your situation makes sense. OP however did not have to work. If you're also not working, and you asked your live-in to work anyway, it comes across a little bit like milking her for every dime. If this is a rare occurrence, and OP needed to actually get things done (ie. she wasn't sitting in bed watching TV while nanny dealt with the kids), it would be fine. Its when you make a habit of milking your nanny for everything you can get that breeds ill feelings. If this has been happening all winter, and OP is also the type to make her nanny work holidays that she has off, and she makes her nanny "earn her keep" while they travel, and so on and so forth, then yeah, that's going to piss your nanny off, even if "that's why you have a live in". Its human nature. No one likes working while others sit idle. It doesn't sound like that is the case here, and OP seemed to find a fair compromise.

I honestly don't think someone is "milking their nanny for everything they can get" if all they are doing is asking her to work the usual time for her regular salary. If I have a day off and choose to spend it reading, or getting a massage or running errands or having an affair or darning the kids' clothes or whatever... it doesn't really matter. I'm paying someone to work in my home and oversee my kids. How I choose to spend that time - whether it's in or out of the house - is my business. The nanny is being paid - she's not being "milked".

Your judgment/attitude is really distasteful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only MB that has to do the same work on snow days--just from home? I mean, so much of work is now via email that it really makes no difference. So long as we have power, I have to work. Try doing that AND looking after the kids- not fun! I would really not even be in a position to give the live-in nanny a snow day--would make no sense.

No - you're not. The same is true for me and my husband. So we can both be at home on snow days but still be expected to be available for conference calls, working online, etc... Unless we've lost power we both have employers that expect us to work or take vacation time. So our nanny stays over if bad weather is predicted.

Your situation makes sense. OP however did not have to work. If you're also not working, and you asked your live-in to work anyway, it comes across a little bit like milking her for every dime. If this is a rare occurrence, and OP needed to actually get things done (ie. she wasn't sitting in bed watching TV while nanny dealt with the kids), it would be fine. Its when you make a habit of milking your nanny for everything you can get that breeds ill feelings. If this has been happening all winter, and OP is also the type to make her nanny work holidays that she has off, and she makes her nanny "earn her keep" while they travel, and so on and so forth, then yeah, that's going to piss your nanny off, even if "that's why you have a live in". Its human nature. No one likes working while others sit idle. It doesn't sound like that is the case here, and OP seemed to find a fair compromise.

I honestly don't think someone is "milking their nanny for everything they can get" if all they are doing is asking her to work the usual time for her regular salary. If I have a day off and choose to spend it reading, or getting a massage or running errands or having an affair or darning the kids' clothes or whatever... it doesn't really matter. I'm paying someone to work in my home and oversee my kids. How I choose to spend that time - whether it's in or out of the house - is my business. The nanny is being paid - she's not being "milked".

Your judgment/attitude is really distasteful.

What judgement or attitude? Having a different viewpoint? Sorry you find that distasteful I understand that you're paying her to do her job. I'm saying that if MB is also not working, and things like this happen often, where you cut your nanny no slack and squeeze every minute you pay for out of her, while she watches you get massages and read, you are breeding bad feelings. OP wasn't working, so asking for some help while she cleans up around the house, seems fine. Having her nanny work the full day while she does nothing is annoying, right or wrong. And if you do things like that often, you end up with a disgruntled nanny. I'm not talking about what is right or wrong, I'm talking about the realities of human nature. No one likes to work, especially when not actually needed, and certainly not while someone else sits nearby not lifting a finger.

In the same vein, a nanny can technically charge you for every minute you're late. She can charge you her OT rate for all babysitting hours. She can do literally nothing more than is spelled out in her contract. But good relationships are built on give and take, and a spirit of generosity not entitlement. It is my opinion that it is best to give when you can, especially if it doesn't hurt you. Holding your nanny to everything you are technically entitled to when its unnecessary does not create this kind of relationship. You're probably also one of those MBs who think a nanny should be helpful where she can, and she's petty if she complains about her employer being a few minutes late daily. You don't get a give and take relationship by being a constant taker.

[Anonymous]

I totally agree with the give and take. I don't charge my bosses extra when they are 30 minutes late or ask me to run to the store for them to pick up a few things when in off duty. As a live in nanny if both parents were home during a snow day just laying around and I had to work my whole amount of time I would be upset. It is so tiring trying to basically hide the parents and keep the children away from them. You can only say mommy and daddy are busy or mommy and daddy are sleeping so many times. To me that is milking a nanny for every minute.

[Anonymous]

If the live-in would get a snow day off- would she still get paid?

[Anonymous]

Look, if the parents are home and not working.they should enjoy the opportunity to spend time with their children.Parents do not realize how important it is to spend time with their children.Forget the money you are paying the nanny bearing in mind that no amount of money can replace that time.
Take it from a 24 years experienced nanny( luckily l have the best employers in the nanny buisness).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look, if the parents are home and not working.they should enjoy the opportunity to spend time with their children.Parents do not realize how important it is to spend time with their children.Forget the money you are paying the nanny bearing in mind that no amount of money can replace that time.
Take it from a 24 years experienced nanny( luckily l have the best employers in the nanny buisness).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only MB that has to do the same work on snow days--just from home? I mean, so much of work is now via email that it really makes no difference. So long as we have power, I have to work. Try doing that AND looking after the kids- not fun! I would really not even be in a position to give the live-in nanny a snow day--would make no sense.

During the last snowstorm we got an email saying that if it wasnt safe to commute, work from home, and if our power was out at home, we were still expected to work. Not sure how, but at least you get the day off if you lose power!

[Anonymous]

Technology has changed the work environment. When professional employees couldn't telework and businesses clearly shut down during a closure, closures were rare. Now, as professional employees can telework business and governments are much more liberal in calling a closure. Its generally a win win as employees don't need to commute, work gets done and deadlines don't move, and the lower traffic helps municipalities clear streets faster/ deal with fewer commuters. Most of the weather closures this year were not safety issues.

The downsides are that it creates significant stress for parents without childcare as they try to juggle kids and work. This new trend doesn't help nannies who hope for a snow day because they have no work to make up and it really is a free day.