What do you all think - nanny called in sick today after only one week on the job
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Anonymous
The OP was clearly responding to the use of the word deplorable to sum up the PP's point. The rest of it may have been totally valid, but when you use inflammatory language people tend not to hear you - they focus on the fact that you've incorrectly insulted them. I've described twice now what I would like to see my nanny do if they truly had to call out on the Monday after they started. As I said, usually you start to feel sick the day before. It would have been terrific if she had texted on Sunday with a warning that she may be coming down with something. Then Monday morning, as soon as she woke up, call and explain and be very apologetic. Offer to come in even so to show that you are committed. Even if she truly, as I said, didn't feel sick Sunday night and woke up feeling horrible, calling and sincerely apologizing would be completely fine. It's not the timing so much as the execution. And no one has said "let her go immediately!!" Everyone has said it's not a good sign. And it's not, particularly when combined with some other issues OP is not all that pleased with after just one week. |
Anonymous
| Op is she scheduled to work tomorrow ? If she does t show up tomorrow and is scheduled to work I would start looking. How many sick days does she have ? Ate you letting her use her sick days during the trial period? I know a lot of companies have a 90 day policy where if you don't show up all 90 days of your trial period you are let go. I think that's quit harsh but it does exist. |
Anonymous
Deplorable is inflammatory now? How about lazy, entitled, the assumption that we're all uneducated, etc? I didn't call OP any names. I said letting someone go 2 weeks before the holidays is deplorable ie. worthy of strong condemnation. You don't think it would be? I also never said that is what OP said she would do. I stated my opinion that to do so, and OP seemed to be considering it, would be pretty awful. |
Anonymous
Ok, very good. I don't see why all of these threads have to devolve into name-calling and failure to attempt an understanding of each other's points. I've said multiple times what I would be looking for if I were an employer of a new nanny in a trial period. I've offered my opinion based on OP's posts. Best of luck to all. |
Anonymous
I would start looking. She sounds like a slacker. 1 hour before? I'd fire her. Also, stop replying to the idiotic nannies. Why even waste your time explaining? |
Anonymous
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Some of you women are just bat shit insane. Sad.
Fire someone because they used a sick day?? Why even give them as an option then, if you never truly intend for your employee to use them, or worse, you scrutinize every incident in which they do. OP- presumably you did not hire a moron (though by the attitude you and the other MBs here have displayed, you clearly think all nannies are morons) and she is aware that using a sick day so early in her employment could jeopardize her job. It's a safe bet that she is actually, very sick and probably feels terrible having to call in so soon. Why not giver her the benefit of the doubt? Honestly, if this is a firing offense to you, you should just stop trying to have a nanny all together. It will be a nightmare for you and anyone you hire. |
Anonymous
Not OP but if the nanny feels so terrible why did she text instead of call? That's the main issue I see here. If a nanny wants to be treated with respect and as a professional then she should act like one. I'd never text my boss to call in sick no matter how long I've been at a job and especially when I've only been there a week. I don't care how sick someone is, it's not that hard to pick up a phone and call. People get sick, fine, but it seems awfully coincidental that she got sick on the day we had a winter storm AND she didn't call but texted. |
Anonymous
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My employers never answer when I call before 7am but they will respond to texts, so I am forced to "text out sick" when I'm unwell. If it's a matter of how she told you, OP, just tell her you understand and in the future you prefer she call to tell you when she's sick. You should also have something outlined in your contract regarding ideal notice times (maybe she didn't know sooner because she only gets up an hour before work, or maybe she didn't want to text or call earlier for fear of waking you up). Assuming she was sick, this is new for her too and her previous employers may have handled things differently. Just tell her how YOU would like her to communicate. If in the next couple weeks she calls out again under suspicious circumstances, tell her you want to extend your trial period an additional 30 days. That gets you through the holidays before having to decide whether she's working out or not/to start looking for a new nanny.
But please don't let a single sick day lead to termination, things happen and this is so early in your relationship you can't fault her for not doing things the way you want them done - she still needs you to tell her! |
Anonymous
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OP, I'm an MB.
Keep looking. Let this nanny take you through the holidays (and through the trial period you've established - and good for you for setting that up!). In the meantime find someone about whom you have a better "gut" instinct. I totally agree that someone can get sick at any time - we're all human. And I don't want my child getting sick through someone not taking a sick day when it's necessary. But if I were in my second week on a job and wanted to keep the job I would give as much notice as possible, call not text, be extremely apologetic and try to sincerely convey that I would only be taking the day off if it was critically necessary. It doesn't sound like your nanny exerted herself at all to build/develop/maintain your confidence in her. And it sounds like you already have some other concerns about her performance. This is what a trial period is for. If you decide to let her go right before xmas (assuming that's even a holiday for you and/or her) then you can always be generous with severance to acknowledge the holiday. Your child will bond with other people also. Turnover is a nightmare but you want a strong, long-term, trusting relationship with your nanny. When you have concerns on day 6 that's a problem. Good luck! |
Anonymous
OP here. Again 
1. Thank you PP - My sentiments exactly on how it was a winter storm. I expect her to be sick tomorrow as well. 2. To the nanny on here who called me a troll trying to rile people - you must have the day off to be going back and attacking the MBs 3. To the nanny who said we are bat shit crazy women. Do you know the pressure we're under at some of our jobs ? How in corporate America it's still not looked favorably upon to call in with a "my nanny called in sick " so I can't work either today or "sorry that's my kid screaming in the background during this conference call". It's worse than when schools are closed, but this time, you get disapproval from your other co-workers for not having your daycare situation together. To all the MBs: One of the worst feelings when you hire someone to take care of your child is that first sign they give you that it might not work work out. Your heart drops and think - Damn. Just when I was in the clear. " And you start the search again unwillingly - because you REALLY wanted it to work out and worse yet, you have to start the trusting process all over again. This woman came highly recommended and because of that I was giving her the benefit of the doubt, except that I thought: she texted me, never bothered to call (that's impolite), and on top of that texted me to tell me she would let me know what her doctor said so I would know what her plans were tomorrow. Yeah, didnt hear from her either. Luckily , we are in a trial period (no sick days now until we were supposed to start her contract on Jan1 ) . Then she would get the standard package. |
Anonymous
I agree with most of your points, however, we don't really know that the nanny DIDN'T do these things. We know she texted. That's it. We don't know what their agreement on calling out was (I have had employers who prefer a text, especially if it is at 5:30 AM). We don't know what she said or how apologetic she was. The assumption, it seems like all of the time, is that the nanny is being shady and that somehow every MBs "gut" feelings are always 100% accurate (definitely never influenced by uncertainty with a new nanny, external stressors, etc). Presumably, OP put a lot of effort into finding this nanny, shouldn't she exert a bit more find out if she is worth keeping around? |
Anonymous
| Okay OP, like most of DCUM you reply only to inflammatory posters or those who already agree with you. What's the point of posting, in that case? Your mind is made up and I wish I hadn't wasted time typing up a reply. |
Anonymous
Everybody has stress at their job. Do you need a hug or something? Caregivers get sick. It happens. When you become a parent, you have to deal with stuff like this. No parent on earth is exempt from this (except DC parents apparently). In every nanny position I have held, my employers didn't even have their phones on in the morning. I would call anyway to leave a message and felt horrible and awkward as hell calling so early. She probably didn't know whether calling or texting would be the best way to get ahold of you. You sound like a handful. |
Anonymous
Yes, that's true. I find it's often difficult to respond effectively because we can never know the full situation - only one side of things, as presented in a pretty limited way. So there may very well be another side to the story (as there often is). But my basic point is that if you're new on a job and have to take time off there are ways to be cavalier about it, or ways to communicate sincere intentions about commitment etc... And I guess that could be done by text (at least to some extent) but it just didn't sound like this person way trying particularly hard to let her brand new employer know that she would be at work if she could. So I was going w/ what I was reading between OP's lines. And I do put a lot of faith in gut instincts - but that goes for nannies as well as MBs (and for kids also BTW). I don't always assume the nanny is shady - I think there are plenty of rotten bosses also. But with this forum we can only work with what we're given - which is automatically limited and biased from the get go. If the OP loves the job the nanny is doing then absolutely work with her and hope this was an aberration. If this is just one more worrisome thing to happen in the first 6 days on the job then I think that there are many more qualified, excellent, trust-worthy nannies out there. |
Anonymous
| I called in sick on my second week of work with my current family....... And 7 years later that's the only time I've ever called in sick. |