nanny needs advice, baby seems hungry

[Anonymous]

So many of the comments on here are just bonkers. It is not neglect to feed a baby on a schedule and we have very few clues to why the MB in OPs situation may want this (though of course, lets all just jump to the logical conclusion that a woman who cares enough for her baby to pay for individual care is clearly neglecting it). Maybe the baby has reflux issues, maybe it has allergies, maybe MB has her own valid reasons for wanting her child fed this way...none of us know, and any speculation or judgement provided, aside from the advice to TALK TO YOUR BOSS (which always seems to be so very difficult for the nannies here to do), are unhelpful. And OP, do not be tempted to follow one posters terrible advice and start secretly supplementing with formula, you will be fired in a second.

[Anonymous]

At 3-4 months a child should be feed 24-27oz of breast milk a day. if she is feeding every 4 hours that is 6 feeding a day. the child should be eating 4-4.5oz per feeding.

[Anonymous]

I talked to DB he said that the baby is eating enough and if they fed him more often or more at one feeding the baby will become chunky

[Anonymous]

They are following a growth chart and want him to stay at 50 percent or lower for weight. I told them that this is not something i can abide by and if i can't feed him adequately they will need to find someone who agrees with them and willing to withhold food

[Anonymous]

If he is not under weight, he is getting the 24-27oz a day of breast milk, and staying healthy than do as the parents tell you to or find a new job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I talked to DB he said that the baby is eating enough and if they fed him more often or more at one feeding the baby will become chunky

Complete stupidity. I wouldn't work for people like this. Start looking elsewhere. They can do what they want I suppose.. the child is being fed.. but I couldn't with hold food from a child who is obviously hungry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I talked to DB he said that the baby is eating enough and if they fed him more often or more at one feeding the baby will become chunky

Complete stupidity. I wouldn't work for people like this. Start looking elsewhere. They can do what they want I suppose.. the child is being fed.. but I couldn't with hold food from a child who is obviously hungry.

How do you know this child is "obviously hungry"? How does OP for that matter? Besides saying he "seems" like it, what assessment or facts have been provided?

[Anonymous]

My MB asked me not to feed the baby so much, because she couldn't produce milk and disnt want a 'fat formula baby'. The baby would scream from hunger all day long, and it's very sad but I had to sneak in extra food! She was home on materniry leave but hid in her room all day 'pumping'. I didn't see her for the 10hrs I was at the house, and she didn't even know her own baby because they had a night nurse. I didn't feel bad feeding the baby without her consent, because my MB is anorexic and doesn't eat. How would she know how to feed a baby? When she would complain about not making milk, I so wanted to tell her "maybe if you ate food you could breast feed"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MB asked me not to feed the baby so much, because she couldn't produce milk and disnt want a 'fat formula baby'. The baby would scream from hunger all day long, and it's very sad but I had to sneak in extra food! She was home on materniry leave but hid in her room all day 'pumping'. I didn't see her for the 10hrs I was at the house, and she didn't even know her own baby because they had a night nurse. I didn't feel bad feeding the baby without her consent, because my MB is anorexic and doesn't eat. How would she know how to feed a baby? When she would complain about not making milk, I so wanted to tell her "maybe if you ate food you could breast feed"

A great example of a nanny not knowing how to do her job or what her place is. If you felt there were issues with the amount of food the baby was eating you should have brought it up to one or both of the parents. If it was severe enough, you should have notified the pediatrician or cps. Never at any point was it a responsible move for you to "sneak" in a formula of your choice. Just the fact that you had to hide it should tell you it was very wrong. If I found out any nanny was doing this, however harmless their intentions may have been, I would do my damn best to make sure they never worked with a baby again.
If you can't do your job without lying and judging, you are not good at your job. Move on please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MB asked me not to feed the baby so much, because she couldn't produce milk and disnt want a 'fat formula baby'. The baby would scream from hunger all day long, and it's very sad but I had to sneak in extra food! She was home on materniry leave but hid in her room all day 'pumping'. I didn't see her for the 10hrs I was at the house, and she didn't even know her own baby because they had a night nurse. I didn't feel bad feeding the baby without her consent, because my MB is anorexic and doesn't eat. How would she know how to feed a baby? When she would complain about not making milk, I so wanted to tell her "maybe if you ate food you could breast feed"

Most breastfed babies get chunky, breast milk has a much higher fat content.

[Anonymous]

OP, I would look for a new job. This problem is a major red flag. There are serious issues here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are following a growth chart and want him to stay at 50 percent or lower for weight. I told them that this is not something i can abide by and if i can't feed him adequately they will need to find someone who agrees with them and willing to withhold food

Good for you, OP. You definately did the right thing.

[Anonymous]

I would not stay working for a family if they wanted me to underfeed their baby. I would try to work with them and discuss how serious and concerning this is. If they didn't wise up, I would quit.

If I was feeling especially brave, I would feed the baby to his satisfaction. Of course the breast milk would run out and the baby would become hungry. I would call the mother and tell her if she doesn't come home right away to feed the baby, I'm purchasing formula and giving it to him, because he's hungry. In my conscience, I just can't allow a baby to regularly be hungry.

I hope you come back and update us, OP. I feel bad for this baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are following a growth chart and want him to stay at 50 percent or lower for weight. I told them that this is not something i can abide by and if i can't feed him adequately they will need to find someone who agrees with them and willing to withhold food

If this is true, OP, I'd report them to their pediatrician and possibly CPS.

[Anonymous]

My last day is Friday, their family will take care of him until they find a replacement. I don't know the name of his pediatrician, when i asked for it they gave me a odd look and i mentioned i always get the pediatricians name in case of emergency but they started i don't need it. If an emergency occurs they will handle it. To the poster who suggested i sneak more food they only leave x amount of breast milk for the day and no way would i pick a formula and give that since babies can have allergies and i don't want to get him sick.