Cell phone rant

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Leave her alone and don't torpedo her if you do get a reference call.

So the OP should lie and say she's wonderful completely omitting the cell phone problem? I never understand why nannies think employers should lie on the reference check. Geez.

No - but the OP shouldn't torpedo an entire reference or job opportunity based on one day, one morning, of a one week assignment.

And I'm an MB - not a nanny, so you didn't read very carefully. I'm not hearing a nightmare nanny here - I'm hearing a nightmare MB to be honest and I think this one week babysitter could pay a high price, unfairly. I'm not recommending lying at all - just some moderation in the assessment, appropriate to the length of the work. Honestly, I'd largely dismiss or not bother with a one week reference as that wouldn't mean much at all to me as an employer..

OP here - I wouldn't give her a bad reference, and in fact as I think I pointed out we've been overall quite happy with her. But I think to be fair I'd have to acknowledge in a reference that there would be areas where she would need guidance as she is not very experienced, and one of those would be to be clear on cell phone use. And I plan on talking to her tomorrow about what she might expect a full-time permanent nanny job to be like. Though it might not seem like it, we are not completely unreasonable employers and in fact maintain great relationships with the fantastic nannies we have been fortunate enough to have work for us. I guess they have left us with very high expectations.

Also, we will be her *only* nanny reference, and she mentions in her nanny profile that she has "just finished working with a family ..." who can only be us as she was not working all summer or ever worked for a family before apart from occasional babysitting, so I do indeed think she will use us as a referance. All the more reason to make an effort to be really professional and make a great impression, even if she's only working for us for a week. Again, to be clear, I will not give her a bad reference, but at the same time I'm not going to pretend she's perfect.

Maybe I over-reacted and I appreciate the reality check and worthwhile feedback here. However I do think she would benefit from taking a bit more of a 'professional' approach to the job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Leave her alone and don't torpedo her if you do get a reference call.

So the OP should lie and say she's wonderful completely omitting the cell phone problem? I never understand why nannies think employers should lie on the reference check. Geez.

No - but the OP shouldn't torpedo an entire reference or job opportunity based on one day, one morning, of a one week assignment.

And I'm an MB - not a nanny, so you didn't read very carefully. I'm not hearing a nightmare nanny here - I'm hearing a nightmare MB to be honest and I think this one week babysitter could pay a high price, unfairly. I'm not recommending lying at all - just some moderation in the assessment, appropriate to the length of the work. Honestly, I'd largely dismiss or not bother with a one week reference as that wouldn't mean much at all to me as an employer..

OP here - I wouldn't give her a bad reference, and in fact as I think I pointed out we've been overall quite happy with her. But I think to be fair I'd have to acknowledge in a reference that there would be areas where she would need guidance as she is not very experienced, and one of those would be to be clear on cell phone use. And I plan on talking to her tomorrow about what she might expect a full-time permanent nanny job to be like. Though it might not seem like it, we are not completely unreasonable employers and in fact maintain great relationships with the fantastic nannies we have been fortunate enough to have work for us. I guess they have left us with very high expectations.

Also, we will be her *only* nanny reference, and she mentions in her nanny profile that she has "just finished working with a family ..." who can only be us as she was not working all summer or ever worked for a family before apart from occasional babysitting, so I do indeed think she will use us as a referance. All the more reason to make an effort to be really professional and make a great impression, even if she's only working for us for a week. Again, to be clear, I will not give her a bad reference, but at the same time I'm not going to pretend she's perfect.

Maybe I over-reacted and I appreciate the reality check and worthwhile feedback here. However I do think she would benefit from taking a bit more of a 'professional' approach to the job.

OP, this all sounds much more moderated and reasonable than the initial info you gave us. I think a lot of us who were pushing back would be much more supportive of your thinking as you've framed it here.

[Anonymous]

I disagree with the posters telling the OP not to mention the cell phone problem with reference callers. The OP should share the honest positive and negatives about the nanny. Most of the problems posted on this board could be avoided if people gave honest references.

[Anonymous]

I don't think you should agree to be a reference for someone who you only employed a week. It's misleading to families interviewing her. Of course, if you plan to be honest in your reference, I would completely disregard you, because, again, you've only known her a week.

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine asking someone I've only worked for for a week to serve as a reference.

[Anonymous]

OP: Your posting is a clear example of why I NEVER work for families where the parent "works from home." Why? Because even though the parent is supposedly "working," it seems they also are micromanaging as well. Clearly that is the case here. If you are supposed to be working, then by all means, work and act like they are not there.

Also, what do you expect from a 23 yr old? Girls at that age practically have their cell phone glued to their hips, didn't you notice?? Trust me, I have three of my own grown kids. LOL.

I think you saw someone who looked good on paper and probably thought she was young and would be able to keep up with your kids. What you didn't realize is that you were hiring someone who was still a kid herself and quite wet behind the ears.

I highly recommend hiring an older nanny next time.
Perhaps someone in their 30's and 40's.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

bump

[Anonymous]

OP, I totally agree with you.

-a teacher, though never a nanny or MB

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP: Your posting is a clear example of why I NEVER work for families where the parent "works from home." Why? Because even though the parent is supposedly "working," it seems they also are micromanaging as well. Clearly that is the case here. If you are supposed to be working, then by all means, work and act like they are not there.

Also, what do you expect from a 23 yr old? Girls at that age practically have their cell phone glued to their hips, didn't you notice?? Trust me, I have three of my own grown kids. LOL.

I think you saw someone who looked good on paper and probably thought she was young and would be able to keep up with your kids. What you didn't realize is that you were hiring someone who was still a kid herself and quite wet behind the ears.

I highly recommend hiring an older nanny next time.
Perhaps someone in their 30's and 40's.

...and the older nannies are know-it-alls....