Car use guidelines for AP? Please share.
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Anonymous
| Just one comment on a particular issue we have dealt with. As a DC HF, it is annoying and challenging when Virginia or Maryland families put an arbitrary no driving into DC restriction on their au pair because it means that my au pair has to drive all the time to see yours and yours can't come to our house to hang out with ours (or in one case we got wrapped up in drama with an AP friend of our APs who lied to her host family about this so she could come to our house to watch a movie. I understand if families want to have certain restrictions on their car and maybe not let her drive into downtown or something, but really nothing magical happens when they cross the DC line to come to my neighborhood and it is no harder to drive in NW DC than Tysons. Please reconsider particularly if your AP's cluster includes DC families. |
Anonymous
We let our au pair drive where ever (I figure, if I trust her to drive my kids around, I trust her to drive anywhere). But that said, I think maybe some host families do this because it's easy to explain - rather than "you can drive into DC, but not downtown, which means these streets and these neighborhoods" - you just say "no driving in DC." We live in Silver Spring and even though we allow our AP to drive into DC, she never has. She takes the Metro. Not sure where you live, but there's so much public transportation everywhere around the area - there's no reason that APs shouldn't be able to at least come to your house on a bus or the Metro. If you're not that close to a Metro, your AP can maybe just pick her up at the Metro? I wouldn't blame a lying AP on not being allowed to drive. |
Anonymous
| VA family here with the no DC rule. We tell her to drive to the metro and take metro into the city. Au pair agency recommended it because of issues they had with girls getting cars towed and lots of parking tickets in the city |
Anonymous
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Another VA Family with no DC rule here.
Why do you say it's 'arbitrary'? Imagine you are driving in Georgetown for the first time? Easy? Then, imagine you are driving thru Georgetown on a Friday or Saturday night. HA! Some areas of DC are like the burbs...others not so much. Do I want my AP or my car to travel thru SE? Um, no. Thru downtown during Cherry Blossom season? Um, no. DC is very confusing with it's street configurations and parking, let alone speed cameras. Most of DC is pretty accessible via Metro or Bus. My APs have never had a problem with other APs driving them down there or taking public trans. My AP had a friend in DC and got together a lot with her with no issues or problems. |
Anonymous
| It's tough because you don't know if she's the 'use and abuse' the privlage type of the one who might take the car for a few hours on a friday night. If she's the latter type then be more laid back regarding car use. If she's the type to go on long road trips out of town with other Aupairs in your vehicle, be a little more strict. |
Anonymous
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I am a host family and honestly do not understand why some families seriously limit the use of their car. This is a young woman who has been dealing with your kids all day and needs to get out. It is very unfair to say, take the bus.
You are asking, generally, for an unhappy AP. Do you want someone like that around your kids. Do you just want her to retreat to her room at night and on weekends. We allow free access whenever our AP wants to get out, except for going to the heart of DC. Just my two cents. How would you want to treated? |
Anonymous
| OP, if you reside in MD or VA, do not live next to Metro - or very close to a station, and want your AP to be happy, then s/he will need some access to a car. We are lucky - we live in DC near Metro and a busy bus route. I am very clear in the match process that the AP is expected to use Metro for social outings. After the AP gets here, and I gain a better sense of personality, I may tweak the rules. For me, if the AP is great with kids and always responsible, I cover the gas. But if the AP behaves likes a sullen teen with outsized expectations about life in America, then I am going to make sure she covers her expense down to the penny. |
Anonymous
Mine have. They can walk to all the childrens activities as well as a 15 minute walk to community college for courses. It takes 45 minutes with public transportation to get to downtown DC. Not a problem and my APs extended for 2 years, so they seem satisfied. To the OP's question, once my DCs start preschool I will buy her a car and provide a monthly gas allowance. I will also pay for insurance. She will be able to freely use the car n her off time, but will be responsible for any gas costs that go over the monthly allowance. |
Anonymous
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If your AP gets in an accident thats her fault while she's working the HF should pay the deductible. If she is on her own time, she should pay it.
Its not fair to expect an AP to pay $500 if she has an accident while shes looking after the kids. I knew a family that lived in VA burbs, The au pair wasnt allowed to use the car when it was dark, In the winter the poor girl had no way to get out of the house after working all day. To the host families that set restrictions on their cars for no real reason, Would you let your child drive into DC when theyre 20, in your car? What about to Maryland if you live in Virginia, or vice versa? To the PP who has the au pair clean and vacuum the car once a week, really? This seems like overkill. |
Anonymous
| We are in VA and don't let the au pairs drive into DC. However, we are willing to make exceptions once the au pair has been with us a few months. Obviously the 3rd nice after arrival we don't want her driving into downtown DC to go to a club - she is welcome to drive to the metro, park, and go into town that way though. If she has a friend who lives in Maryland, its ok to drive there sometimes as long as she knows where she's going. On the other hand, we don't really care where she goes in VA, so Arlington or Reston are fine, no questions asked. Its a bit arbitrary, but we don't live in Arlington and we've never had an au pair with friends in DC, so driving there has never come up. |
Anonymous
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A couple of things I didn't see mentioned above:
I'm including in my updated handbook a warning about speed cameras. If you get a speeding ticket from a speed camera--you must pay it. We also add warnings about not drinking and driving (or riding with someone who does). If you want to use GPS, please use our GPS that attaches to the windshield, not your phone. |
Anonymous
If our AP goes to DC, she takes metro. The restriction is meant mainly to prevent clubbing and driving (after drinking) and to keep her from getting parking tickets. We're in Falls Church so we have no DC families in our cluster. |