Really annoyed with my nanny

[Anonymous]

This is a huge downside of being a nanny...a lot of pressure to never be sick as you are inconveniencing an entire family. They should all have backup care in place for these occasions.

[Anonymous]

Kudos to the MB who can still think clearly.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the 12:50 post and 13:48. It seems like there is some sort of miscommunication. Because it has happened more than once it very well could be due to culture. I would just be upfront about it with her, as uncomfortable as it might be. Knowing that if it is part of her culture, she might not admit to it outright.

[Anonymous]

OP here. She is not from a different culture, way to speculate and run with it! She is 25 has been working with us for 6 months. I don't care if she has sick time off, as long as she gives us proper notice. My last nanny who left to have a family, used all of her sick time, and it didn't bother me as she notified us with reasonable time, meaning not day of or night before work like 9 and down, when its nearly impossible to find back up.

[Anonymous]

OP here. 9pm and down. I meant. My last nanny had no qualms about asking for help when needed, and being honest and I appreciated that about her, she didn't play footsie, she spoke up and told me if she had a concern. Communication was not an issue!Not sure if she's trying to be super nanny and return making things for difficult here and there.

[Anonymous]

Well guess what sometimes illnesses hit in the middle of the night! What do you do then? Just expect her to come in still? I got a bad stomach flu recently and started vomiting non stop at 4am and had to call in sick as soon as I could THAT morning!

[Anonymous]

I once went from feeling just fine to feeling a little sick when I was walking out the door. Terrible diarrhea from the kids stomach bug. No notice but I was stuck in the bathroom all morning!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She is not from a different culture, way to speculate and run with it! She is 25 has been working with us for 6 months. I don't care if she has sick time off, as long as she gives us proper notice. My last nanny who left to have a family, used all of her sick time, and it didn't bother me as she notified us with reasonable time, meaning not day of or night before work like 9 and down, when its nearly impossible to find back up.

OP, she started feeling sick and let you know so you would be aware and have a little heads up. This was so you could maybe start preparing for backup, just incase. I'm sure she didn't want to let you down or else she would have just called out and although I don't believe stringing you along is any better, I don't think her intentions were bad.

I agree with the others, you nanny is probably a "people pleaser" and didn't want to let you down and was trying to hint at you and hope you'd tell her to stay home and rest. It's a passive, less direct way and I think a talk to let her know how to handle these situations next time would be best. This way you don't end up building resentment and becoming annoyed. I don't think she's doing it intentionally which is why you would talk to her, so she is aware of these situations and how they inconvience you and your family.

As for the careseat thing, that would annoy me too. Like I said, talk with her to let her know that you would rather help when you can if she's unsure of how to do something, rather then assume and inconvience your whole family later.

[Anonymous]

She's a ding-a-ling, OP. Prepare to be annoyed for something else soon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She is not from a different culture, way to speculate and run with it! She is 25 has been working with us for 6 months. I don't care if she has sick time off, as long as she gives us proper notice. My last nanny who left to have a family, used all of her sick time, and it didn't bother me as she notified us with reasonable time, meaning not day of or night before work like 9 and down, when its nearly impossible to find back up.

So what is a nanny supposed to do if she goes to sleep feeling fine, and then wakes up 2 hours before she is supposed to be at work and realizes that she feels like crap, starts to vomit while attempting to get ready for work, etc? This would be last minute, it's not something that could not be helped either. She felt fine the night before (in my example), she cannot give you advance notice by the afternoon/evening the day before. You have to be ready for situations like that, where you get practically no notice because that does happen sometimes. I will give notice the evening before if I know I am too sick (like I still have a fever or vomiting that afternoon) but not everything starts off in a timely manner for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She is not from a different culture, way to speculate and run with it! She is 25 has been working with us for 6 months. I don't care if she has sick time off, as long as she gives us proper notice. My last nanny who left to have a family, used all of her sick time, and it didn't bother me as she notified us with reasonable time, meaning not day of or night before work like 9 and down, when its nearly impossible to find back up.

So what is a nanny supposed to do if she goes to sleep feeling fine, and then wakes up 2 hours before she is supposed to be at work and realizes that she feels like crap, starts to vomit while attempting to get ready for work, etc? This would be last minute, it's not something that could not be helped either. She felt fine the night before (in my example), she cannot give you advance notice by the afternoon/evening the day before. You have to be ready for situations like that, where you get practically no notice because that does happen sometimes. I will give notice the evening before if I know I am too sick (like I still have a fever or vomiting that afternoon) but not everything starts off in a timely manner for you.

I agree with this...what do you think then, OP? I'm honestly curious b/c I actually was on your side up until your second post that included your "guidelines" for sick days. To be honest, I have never in my life suddenly come down with the flu or anything like that but obviously many people have, and do. Do you really expect her future sickness germs to think, "hmm, I better start attacking nanny's immune system early today so she can let MB know by 9 pm!" Silly, I know, but clearly not a realistic expectation on your part.

Carseat thing, however, WOULD really annoy me, too.

[Anonymous]

Can she have her own car seat in her car?
That way you could make sure its installed correctly and no one has to worry about it.

[Anonymous]

How about my baby (1yo) was admitted to the hospital during a trip to ER and we had to stay there for 2 nights with no sleep and when i told my MB what was happening, she didnt even offered me to stay with my child, both days--- so i had to leave my sick little baby at the hospital all miserable to go get her kids at school and drive to an activity----What one PP said was right on, sometimes we let our MB's know what is going on hoping they would tell us to attend to the last minute emergency because i was too afraid of telling her i wasnt going to work and then get fired. Maybe your nanny did the same thing.

[Anonymous]

Since when we get notice a couple days in advance that we are going to get sick!? This is very new to me.

[Anonymous]

All of my sick times are planned a year in advance. I know they exact day (& time!!!) I'm going to get sick. All colds, flus, stomach bugs etc. I even have one day coming up hurray. Glad I know in advance - makes life so much easier.