MICROMANAGING

[Anonymous]

I had an MB that showed me exactly how she sung itsy bitsy spider so I could sing it the same way and do the exact same hand motions.
She also showed me how she changes his diaper....really!

She also liked him to look babyish, like in those all in one outfits every day. I would dress him in the mornings in pants and shirts that were in his dresser and she would tell me that it was ok for him to wear what he was wearing and that I didn't "need" to change him...in other words, I don't want him wearing his real clothes even though there his.

[Anonymous]

13:26, this is 00:55 again and I'm glad that you found it helpful. I think the key difference between a micromanaging MB and one who is easy to work for is having communication be a dialogue, not a soliloquy. I think every MB has their little things that they just want a certain way (for example, I had an MB who couldn't care less whether the kitchen was a disaster, but it stressed her out if the playroom wasn't organized by the end of the day, every day. It's okay to have things that are an absolute hard-and-fast rule with no room for discussion, provided that MOST of your communication is a two-way street. It's when the bulk of the communication between MB and nanny is directions, orders or corrections from MB to nanny, with little or no opportunity for response, then things are not going well.

Look at it another way: many nannies (myself included) have other things they could be doing with their life. Even if they like working with kids, working in a preschool, daycare or home child care center are all jobs with more stability. So why choose to work for only one family and subject yourself to the visscitudes of their financial and emotional well-being? For the best nannies (a group I arrogantly include myself in) this field offers both a depth and a flexibility that we love. So if you fabulous nanny chose this field so that she can develop a deep bond with her charges and so that she can manage her own daily schedule with freedom to choose the park or the museum or something else on a whim, then too much input robs her of the parts of her job she loves best. How can I build a relationship with your kids if I am only allowed to do things just like mommy? I don't want to be the emergency back-up mom; I want to be myself, and have the children know me and get to know them in our own way. Likewise, if I wanted someone to schedule my entire day for me, I would be in a cubicle somewhere. MB and DB should have input of course, and not all of my tasks are fun, but the luxury of choosing when and how to dothe un-fun tasks (like laundry, dishes, etc.) is one of the perks of this job.