Guy here: I would never comment on a woman's physicality unless I knew them very well. The problem is that people are all different and they all have different thresholds for what they deem as offensive or creepy. Also, numerous women have probably been through a scenario like the one above (that guy needed to be punched in the face,btw). So why even risk flaring up their creepy incident PTSD?

It feels good to pay someone a compliment but it isn't alway received the same way it's transmitted. Just say hello, if anything, and leave it at that.

Anonymous wrote:I was caught in a thunderstorm once while unloading my too many grocery bags into the trunk. Damn pour down came out of no where so I had no umbrella and was using the trunk lid as cover. I had just put two bags in when I looked up to grab more and a man was standing there. Didn't see him approach. He startled me. He asked if I needed help and I said no thank you. He started walking away, turned to me and said, nice tits bitch.

The blood left my whole body and I felt paralyzed. I looked to see if anyone heard him then realized I was the only one in the parking lot in that area. Everyone was inside waiting for the rain to stop. He could have easily pushed me into the trunk, closed the lid and took me somewhere no one would ever think to look. In my mind, he had bad intent towards me. I never shopped that store again.


ANY man OP, doing what you seem comfortable doing to strange random women, is a potential sex criminal to me. You need to quit doing that shit.

I am so sorry this happened to you. Unfortunately some variation on this happens to almost all of us in our lifetimes.

As long as men feel entitled to our time and attention, as long as they feel like they can set the agendas for our days and tell us how to feel, this is going to keep happening.

OP, men like you ARE THE PROBLEM. You've got a few dozen women taking time out of our day to persuade you that we, and not you, know what we want and how we should be treated.

Get it through your head: we don't want to talk to you. We want to live our lives. We don't walk out the door giving the slightest shit whether you approve of our appearance or even if you want us to be happy. Which, by the way, would be better achieved by showing some freaking boundaries.

You're not trying to make us happy. You're trying to get access to women's attention by giving them what YOU want to give them, and rationalizing that your attention is worth more than a bucket of warm hamster vomit.

Get a hobby.

I was caught in a thunderstorm once while unloading my too many grocery bags into the trunk. Damn pour down came out of no where so I had no umbrella and was using the trunk lid as cover. I had just put two bags in when I looked up to grab more and a man was standing there. Didn't see him approach. He startled me. He asked if I needed help and I said no thank you. He started walking away, turned to me and said, nice tits bitch.

The blood left my whole body and I felt paralyzed. I looked to see if anyone heard him then realized I was the only one in the parking lot in that area. Everyone was inside waiting for the rain to stop. He could have easily pushed me into the trunk, closed the lid and took me somewhere no one would ever think to look. In my mind, he had bad intent towards me. I never shopped that store again.


ANY man OP, doing what you seem comfortable doing to strange random women, is a potential sex criminal to me. You need to quit doing that shit.

Here's why street harassment exists and why women don't get to enjoy a walk down the street in the quiet of our own thoughts as men do:

No matter how many times we say we don't like it unsolicited conversation, men will always, always come back and try to sell us on how great it is and that we need to change our outlook.

Some women don't mind it, but nobody would cry if it stopped altogether.

When a stranger tells me to smile I tell him I'll do it right after he cleans the gutters and loads the dishwasher.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP seems to be recovering nicely from his anxiety about why his long-time girlfriend hasn't bitten the bullet and dumped it yet.


http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/493203.page

What a singular voice you have, sir. Humbert Humbert meets US Weekly.

OP

No connection.

Jeff can look at IP addresses but I'm sure he's too busy.

It's so you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had strangers compliment me before. The last time it happened, I had just started a weight loss program and was feeling pretty down. I was at Whole Foods and had a man come up to me and say "Excuse me, I just wanted to tell you that you are beautiful. You are very statuesque." I said thank you very much. He said that when you see something or someone that you think is beautiful, you should tell them. Then he walked away. I am from the same mindset as him and he absolutely made my day. There was nothing creepy about how he went about it.

I rarely get so taken by the physical beauty of another person that I feel compelled to comment about it. Every once in a very rare blue moon it happens that a man is so attractive that I get weak kneed - I remember getting out of my car to run into the grocery store one day. Tired wife/mom of 2 little boys dressed in jeans, tee with hair in a pony tail. I looked across the parking lot and - there was this stunning, tall, dark, handsome guy in a business suit looking so hot and powerful and drop dead sexy. It was the sort of thing where you feel the sparks in the air coming off of him....and I couldn't have said two coherent words to the guy if I had wanted to.

It just makes me wonder how these men who are so awestruck by a woman's physical beauty that they chase her down to compliment her can be so calm, cool about it.

I think the ones who aren't creepy are the fly-by complimenters who toss out a "hi beautiful" to every reasonably good looking woman they pass. You can tell they don't expect anything and are just aiming for a smile.

Anonymous wrote:Male

And since I have NEVER...and I don't do this often...had a woman reject me...perhaps it's in the delivery and sincerity in my voice.

And no...I don't consider myself unique...I was just curious how often etc.

NP, didn't read the whole threat. The answer to the bolded question is, all the time. And if someone said to me what you said you like to say, I would at BEST roll my eyes and walk away. You sound entitled, like you expect random women to engage with you. They are not obligated to do so, FYI.

Anonymous wrote:Didn't read the whole thread.

I am often told to smile by passersby... I have reccently taken to telling them that I'm "not here to be pretty for you" and that seems to shut them up.

-- I HATE this. HATE HATE HATE it. I've taken to saying my mom died yesterday.

Anonymous wrote:OP, you have to understand that women are conditioned to be "nice" and that's all they are doing when you have these strange conversations. It's creepy.

joke of the day!

If OP approached me like he did other strange women and started his creepy compliment I'd pepper spray him in the face.

It's Ted Bundy creepy.

Anonymous wrote:Yes and I love it!

+1

My experience as well. I smile and say thank you ...... and it makes my day.

Yes and I love it!

Didn't read the whole thread.

I am often told to smile by passersby... I have reccently taken to telling them that I'm "not here to be pretty for you" and that seems to shut them up.

On the flipside, my garbage man commented on my weight loss the other day. I cannot really tell you what he did that was so, I don't know, correct, but he did it in a way that was not creepy and totally flattering... just an observation that I've put in the work and should be proud of myself. if you must say something, and you don't but I'm not going to argue, however he did it is the right way.

OP, shut your mouth and say nothing. Just stop talking.

I guessed you are in a carpet cleaning business. I may change my guess to carnival barker/midway carnival/boardwalk skee ball proprietor. You remind me of the lecherous guy behind a microphone who calls out to passersby short comments to bring in business.

Hey, pretty lady, bring your brothers on in here for a chance to win big! (Said to a youthful looking Mom with two little boys in tow)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Road my bike cross-country. In bike shorts. Teenager working at Taco Bell in Arkansas told me I had tight buns.

OP

I could never tell any woman something like unless she was my gf or wife. lol

Cyclist pp here. I'm a man.