daycare.

Daycare has had such an enormously positive impact on our entire family. We have made so many family friends through our daycare center; many of the teachers have become friends and/or weekend babysitters. Our daycare follows a third party curriculum so my kids get sensory activities (as babies) and arts/crafts as toddlers; they go to library storytime, they go to the grocery store, they get Spanish every day. They love their little friends and teachers. My youngest is still a baby so who knows how she'll turn out but my oldest is the most outgoing, friendly kid I've ever met. She lsings her daycare songs constantly and is always playing "teacher" with her baby dolls and acting out games she learned.

I'm a little surprised the tide is SO heavily toward nanny here tbh. I think both have enormous value but honestly, once we had our second the cost would have been the same and we opted to stick with daycare. It's like a second home to us. Both of our kids have gone since they were 3 months old.

Selfishly I also love that they are out of the house. Less wear and tear on the house, less mess, less junk I have to buy, and way less groceries and cooking.

Just wanted to weigh in with a slightly different POV. We love daycare.

Anonymous wrote:I chose day care for my kids - I like the fact that there was more than one person responsible for the care of my children. I was uncomfortable with the idea that it was one person watching my kids with no other people in the vicinity and I didn't want to install nanny cams. I was lucky that my MIL watched mine until they were about 8.5 months old.

Sadly the only kids I know who were hurt by providers were at daycares. One was killed in a nap room, where there was only one caregiver at a time.

What I like about nannies is that you can do a long working trial and check all references thoroughly. I basically worked from home til my kids were verbal. But if you establish good communication you will know if something is going on with them, like life stress etc. It is high burnout work no matter where it’s done.

Anonymous wrote:I chose day care for my kids - I like the fact that there was more than one person responsible for the care of my children. I was uncomfortable with the idea that it was one person watching my kids with no other people in the vicinity and I didn't want to install nanny cams. I was lucky that my MIL watched mine until they were about 8.5 months old.

Does your daycare have online cameras you can watch?

I chose day care for my kids - I like the fact that there was more than one person responsible for the care of my children. I was uncomfortable with the idea that it was one person watching my kids with no other people in the vicinity and I didn't want to install nanny cams. I was lucky that my MIL watched mine until they were about 8.5 months old.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nanny. But the cost was never an issue for us. And I wanted our baby to be cared for specifically. Not herded along in a group, forced to eat and nap when the daycare decided it was time.

Herded? You should see the bayonets they use to keep the toddlers in line. It is actually really cute and sweet to see the little kids line up to go to the playground and the like.

Also, they don't try to keep infants on a schedule. They eat and sleep when they want to.

There are pros and cons to both set ups; it is just really funny to see some of the caricatures that people have of daycare, in most cases by people who have never used a daycare, or at least a good one.

Please name some daycares that you think are such a great places for a four month old baby.

+1 Do people really think putting a 4 month old in an institution 8 hours a day is better than being at their own home with one person?

But when they all are lined up together in their prison issued onesies, they look so cute.

Nanny, hands down. A lot of babies don’t sleep well in a group setting where they can’t get an individualized schedule. Disrupted day sleep leads to issues with night sleep. Plus, so many illnesses when they start. It’s not uncommon for them to be too ill to go for many days in the first few months, not to mention constant ear infections and risk of surgical tubes that goes with it.

A good nanny will provide everything that a good daycare would provide plus all the extras (less illness, individual attention, more reading, sleeping in own bed, etc).

But if you can’t find or afford a good nanny, a good daycare is fine.

Honestly, I had an awesome daycare provider lined up prior to my baby’s birth; it came highly recommended and I loved it. When it came time to return to work, my DH and I just could not do it. I think you will be surprised by how tiny and needy infants are in that stage. A full day in daycare is very, very long for a child that small.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nanny. But the cost was never an issue for us. And I wanted our baby to be cared for specifically. Not herded along in a group, forced to eat and nap when the daycare decided it was time.

Herded? You should see the bayonets they use to keep the toddlers in line. It is actually really cute and sweet to see the little kids line up to go to the playground and the like.

Also, they don't try to keep infants on a schedule. They eat and sleep when they want to.

There are pros and cons to both set ups; it is just really funny to see some of the caricatures that people have of daycare, in most cases by people who have never used a daycare, or at least a good one.

Please name some daycares that you think are such a great places for a four month old baby.

+1 Do people really think putting a 4 month old in an institution 8 hours a day is better than being at their own home with one person?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NANNY.


And lots of grandmothers say they’ll babysit for days and days but I have never seen it work out in American culture. The grandmother either disregards everything the mother asks or the grandmother flakes. They forget how hard taking care of a small human is.

A good nanny will engage your baby, socialize him, teach him and, most important of all’ love him.

Huge plus for you is that the nanny will do all child related chores-baby’s laundry, putting away and cleaning baby’s toys, wash baby’s bottles and dishes, make fresh baby food, etc. Daycare sends everything home dirty.

A nanny is going to love the child? Not likely. I love on this board how people say daycare workers are generally indifferent to their charges, but that a nanny will love the children. Because they may be paid a bit better? Love can't be bought, especially on a nanny's salary.

A good nanny will genuinely care for a child (and the other things you mentioned) -- but that is no different than what happens at a good daycare. You don't think there is socialization and teaching there as well?

A good nanny will socialize the child as well as give lots of individual attention.

And yes, all the nannies I know honestly love their charges - and not because of a much higher hourly wage - but because the nanny is with the baby alone for eight to ten hours a day and he is her sole focus. Nannies care for their charges when healthy and when sick. And a nanny is in the baby’s home which is very different than both showing up at a daycare.

Let me introduce you to a nanny who wouldn't meet your standards. https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/841804.page

And it doesn't sound like this nanny is particularly bad and seems to have experience. It is just an example that with nannies, as with almost any job, you have everything from really good (apparently all the ones you have met), to decent (the one in the post above), to really terrible.

As a nanny, do you think I’ve never met horrible nannies over the years as well as horrible parents? I also know a daycare teacher who is so mean and hateful when no one is watching and another daycare teacher who only smiles when the parents are present.

If you are the PP I was responding to, then, based on your post, I don't think you have ever met any bad nannies. You/PP said that all the nannies you know "love their charges."

Are you saying that, some of these nannies love their charges, but were still horrible nannies? I guess that is theoretically possible if someone is well meaning, but really bad at their job. But that sure didn't seem to be the implication of your post.

Oh, sorry. I should have clarified that I was a new poster. I have seen bad nannies, bad parents and bad daycare workers. Apparently the PP hasn’t.

Nanny! It will make your life so much easier. With daycare, you're rushing to get your child dressed, fed and packed before you can get out the door. You're either taking a sick day or scrambling for backup care every time your baby gets the sniffles (which will be a lot, especially in daycare). A good nanny will do all this, plus do your baby's laundry and possibly even some light cleaning when the baby sleeps.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NANNY.


And lots of grandmothers say they’ll babysit for days and days but I have never seen it work out in American culture. The grandmother either disregards everything the mother asks or the grandmother flakes. They forget how hard taking care of a small human is.

A good nanny will engage your baby, socialize him, teach him and, most important of all’ love him.

Huge plus for you is that the nanny will do all child related chores-baby’s laundry, putting away and cleaning baby’s toys, wash baby’s bottles and dishes, make fresh baby food, etc. Daycare sends everything home dirty.

A nanny is going to love the child? Not likely. I love on this board how people say daycare workers are generally indifferent to their charges, but that a nanny will love the children. Because they may be paid a bit better? Love can't be bought, especially on a nanny's salary.

A good nanny will genuinely care for a child (and the other things you mentioned) -- but that is no different than what happens at a good daycare. You don't think there is socialization and teaching there as well?

A good nanny will socialize the child as well as give lots of individual attention.

And yes, all the nannies I know honestly love their charges - and not because of a much higher hourly wage - but because the nanny is with the baby alone for eight to ten hours a day and he is her sole focus. Nannies care for their charges when healthy and when sick. And a nanny is in the baby’s home which is very different than both showing up at a daycare.

Let me introduce you to a nanny who wouldn't meet your standards. https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/841804.page

And it doesn't sound like this nanny is particularly bad and seems to have experience. It is just an example that with nannies, as with almost any job, you have everything from really good (apparently all the ones you have met), to decent (the one in the post above), to really terrible.

As a nanny, do you think I’ve never met horrible nannies over the years as well as horrible parents? I also know a daycare teacher who is so mean and hateful when no one is watching and another daycare teacher who only smiles when the parents are present.

If you are the PP I was responding to, then, based on your post, I don't think you have ever met any bad nannies. You/PP said that all the nannies you know "love their charges."

Are you saying that, some of these nannies love their charges, but were still horrible nannies? I guess that is theoretically possible if someone is well meaning, but really bad at their job. But that sure didn't seem to be the implication of your post.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NANNY.


And lots of grandmothers say they’ll babysit for days and days but I have never seen it work out in American culture. The grandmother either disregards everything the mother asks or the grandmother flakes. They forget how hard taking care of a small human is.

A good nanny will engage your baby, socialize him, teach him and, most important of all’ love him.

Huge plus for you is that the nanny will do all child related chores-baby’s laundry, putting away and cleaning baby’s toys, wash baby’s bottles and dishes, make fresh baby food, etc. Daycare sends everything home dirty.

A nanny is going to love the child? Not likely. I love on this board how people say daycare workers are generally indifferent to their charges, but that a nanny will love the children. Because they may be paid a bit better? Love can't be bought, especially on a nanny's salary.

A good nanny will genuinely care for a child (and the other things you mentioned) -- but that is no different than what happens at a good daycare. You don't think there is socialization and teaching there as well?

A good nanny will socialize the child as well as give lots of individual attention.

And yes, all the nannies I know honestly love their charges - and not because of a much higher hourly wage - but because the nanny is with the baby alone for eight to ten hours a day and he is her sole focus. Nannies care for their charges when healthy and when sick. And a nanny is in the baby’s home which is very different than both showing up at a daycare.

Let me introduce you to a nanny who wouldn't meet your standards. https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/841804.page

And it doesn't sound like this nanny is particularly bad and seems to have experience. It is just an example that with nannies, as with almost any job, you have everything from really good (apparently all the ones you have met), to decent (the one in the post above), to really terrible.

As a nanny, do you think I’ve never met horrible nannies over the years as well as horrible parents? I also know a daycare teacher who is so mean and hateful when no one is watching and another daycare teacher who only smiles when the parents are present.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NANNY.


And lots of grandmothers say they’ll babysit for days and days but I have never seen it work out in American culture. The grandmother either disregards everything the mother asks or the grandmother flakes. They forget how hard taking care of a small human is.

A good nanny will engage your baby, socialize him, teach him and, most important of all’ love him.

Huge plus for you is that the nanny will do all child related chores-baby’s laundry, putting away and cleaning baby’s toys, wash baby’s bottles and dishes, make fresh baby food, etc. Daycare sends everything home dirty.

A nanny is going to love the child? Not likely. I love on this board how people say daycare workers are generally indifferent to their charges, but that a nanny will love the children. Because they may be paid a bit better? Love can't be bought, especially on a nanny's salary.

A good nanny will genuinely care for a child (and the other things you mentioned) -- but that is no different than what happens at a good daycare. You don't think there is socialization and teaching there as well?

A good nanny will socialize the child as well as give lots of individual attention.

And yes, all the nannies I know honestly love their charges - and not because of a much higher hourly wage - but because the nanny is with the baby alone for eight to ten hours a day and he is her sole focus. Nannies care for their charges when healthy and when sick. And a nanny is in the baby’s home which is very different than both showing up at a daycare.

Let me introduce you to a nanny who wouldn't meet your standards. https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/841804.page

And it doesn't sound like this nanny is particularly bad and seems to have experience. It is just an example that with nannies, as with almost any job, you have everything from really good (apparently all the ones you have met), to decent (the one in the post above), to really terrible.