some good ideas on this thread:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1306928.page

Tufts, Rice, Hav

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are these people that use the word "striver" when talking about teenagers?

I guess Muffy and Buffy now actually need to study. Tragic. The world is collapsing.

One can study hard and do well without being a total stress case who is constantly saying "what did you get?" and running over peers in order to be #1.

Either 1) you are a striver, or 2) you have been fortunate not to encounter too many of them. They are truly miserable.

Whatever. To strive, if you actually look at a dictionary means, to make a vigorous, determined effort to achieve a goal, often involving hard work, perseverance, and overcoming challenges. Being a striver is a good thing.

I feel like some of these "anti-striver" posts are coded from people who don't want their kids around too many Asians (the way some people didn't want their kids to go to school with Jews in the 1950s.)

Found the triggered striver mom!

No idea why you drag race into this, but IME strivers are typically upper middle class whites.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are these people that use the word "striver" when talking about teenagers?

I guess Muffy and Buffy now actually need to study. Tragic. The world is collapsing.

One can study hard and do well without being a total stress case who is constantly saying "what did you get?" and running over peers in order to be #1.

Either 1) you are a striver, or 2) you have been fortunate not to encounter too many of them. They are truly miserable.

Whatever. To strive, if you actually look at a dictionary means, to make a vigorous, determined effort to achieve a goal, often involving hard work, perseverance, and overcoming challenges. Being a striver is a good thing.

I feel like some of these "anti-striver" posts are coded from people who don't want their kids around too many Asians (the way some people didn't want their kids to go to school with Jews in the 1950s.)

Don't agree with the "Asian" part, but agree they don't want to be around kids who actually care about studying.

Anonymous wrote:I was a STEM major (pre-med) at Bowdoin and even then did not know any of my classmates' grades. The culture was such that everyone studied hard, but you were in competition with the material, not your peers.

btw, still had great outcomes: historically we have had 80-90% medical school acceptance rate

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are these people that use the word "striver" when talking about teenagers?

I guess Muffy and Buffy now actually need to study. Tragic. The world is collapsing.

One can study hard and do well without being a total stress case who is constantly saying "what did you get?" and running over peers in order to be #1.

Either 1) you are a striver, or 2) you have been fortunate not to encounter too many of them. They are truly miserable.

Whatever. To strive, if you actually look at a dictionary means, to make a vigorous, determined effort to achieve a goal, often involving hard work, perseverance, and overcoming challenges. Being a striver is a good thing.

I feel like some of these "anti-striver" posts are coded from people who don't want their kids around too many Asians (the way some people didn't want their kids to go to school with Jews in the 1950s.)

Anonymous wrote:Who are these people that use the word "striver" when talking about teenagers?

I guess Muffy and Buffy now actually need to study. Tragic. The world is collapsing.

One can study hard and do well without being a total stress case who is constantly saying "what did you get?" and running over peers in order to be #1.

Either 1) you are a striver, or 2) you have been fortunate not to encounter too many of them. They are truly miserable.

UGA

Who are these people that use the word "striver" when talking about teenagers?

I guess Muffy and Buffy now actually need to study. Tragic. The world is collapsing.

Emory

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Northwestern! D1 school with excellent academics. Kids are collaborative not competitive, yet everyone gets good results. I think it also helps when there is no grade deflation.

So good to hear this twice in this thread, DD got in ED and this is the goal.

Congratulations!!

I went to Duke and when I went to a top tier professional school, it was very clear how much more relaxed and comfortable in their own skin the Duke alums than people from almost every other school (while still being top achievers). We got our work done very well with much less drama than others.

Unfortunately, I think Duke has a lot more strivers now than it used to. Which is really too bad. I think a non-striver can still be happy there if they can avoid getting sucked in.

DC has several friends who are at UChicago and describe it as collaborative. The classes are so tough that you pretty much need to be that way to survive.

Midwest and California

If you're looking Ivies, look at Yale. It was very collaborative back in my day, although I have heard clubs are competitive now (unfortunate change).