Anonymous
09/02/2025 23:00
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Crying and feeling homesick/worrying they will never make friends, normal.
“I hate it here, i want to transfer”-fairly unusual, I’d look hard at whether they are depressed and/or the school is not a good fit.
JUST. STOP. It's September 2. You are not being helpful.
Disagree-it’s unusual (though ok!) to say you hate it and want to transfer (rather than “oh no I have no friends maybe I’ll never have friends!”)
Most of those kids who “hate it and want to transfer” settle down and do just fine (and those who don’t and end up transferring also are ok and do just fine!) but what’s the point in acting like that’s not at one end of the bell curve?
Certainly id keep a closer eye on an “I’m miserable and hate it!” kid than an “I’m super nervous!” kid. Why wouldn’t you?
This thread is about being homesick, not being nervous.
Anonymous
09/02/2025 22:38
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Anonymous wrote:My god let the poor child come home and regroup
Which child?
Anonymous
09/02/2025 22:06
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Crying and feeling homesick/worrying they will never make friends, normal.
“I hate it here, i want to transfer”-fairly unusual, I’d look hard at whether they are depressed and/or the school is not a good fit.
JUST. STOP. It's September 2. You are not being helpful.
Disagree-it’s unusual (though ok!) to say you hate it and want to transfer (rather than “oh no I have no friends maybe I’ll never have friends!”)
Most of those kids who “hate it and want to transfer” settle down and do just fine (and those who don’t and end up transferring also are ok and do just fine!) but what’s the point in acting like that’s not at one end of the bell curve?
Certainly id keep a closer eye on an “I’m miserable and hate it!” kid than an “I’m super nervous!” kid. Why wouldn’t you?
Anonymous
09/02/2025 21:59
Subject: How homesick is normal?
My god let the poor child come home and regroup
Anonymous
09/02/2025 21:57
Subject: How homesick is normal?
It's so hard for parents, but it's absolutely within the range of normal.
Not every kid feels that way, but my sense from talking with other parents is that many more kids than we realize experience homesickness, doubts, second thoughts etc.
Going off to college is a huge transition. Kids have left everyone they know and love, they're processing a ton of changes, and they're often exhausted from staying up way too late, especially the first few weeks. It takes time for things to settle down and for them to feel more at home.
There was a good post about this last week:
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1289319.page
A few trolls (ignore) but also some advice and an article that I found super helpful.
Hang in there!
Not every kid feels that way, but my sense from talking with other parents is that many more kids than we realize experience homesickness, doubts, second thoughts etc.
Going off to college is a huge transition. Kids have left everyone they know and love, they're processing a ton of changes, and they're often exhausted from staying up way too late, especially the first few weeks. It takes time for things to settle down and for them to feel more at home.
There was a good post about this last week:
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1289319.page
A few trolls (ignore) but also some advice and an article that I found super helpful.
Hang in there!
Anonymous
09/02/2025 20:38
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Look into it during spring break
Anonymous
09/02/2025 20:36
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Is this class less well adjusted than others given COVID impacted their 7/8 years? They seemed socially stunted at our HS.
Anonymous
09/02/2025 20:12
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Anonymous wrote:Crying and feeling homesick/worrying they will never make friends, normal.
“I hate it here, i want to transfer”-fairly unusual, I’d look hard at whether they are depressed and/or the school is not a good fit.
It is definitely NOT unusual. My kids were both in that headspace at one point freshman year and were not depressed and the school fit was fine. It often just their brains trying to problem solve and an emotional reaction to trying to get away from some discomfort. Also my tiktok algo is filled with kids saying this exact thing and always is around this time of year.
Anonymous
09/02/2025 20:05
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Anonymous wrote:Crying and feeling homesick/worrying they will never make friends, normal.
“I hate it here, i want to transfer”-fairly unusual, I’d look hard at whether they are depressed and/or the school is not a good fit.
JUST. STOP. It's September 2. You are not being helpful.
Anonymous
09/02/2025 20:04
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Very normal. My DD is having a rough time. She has met people, but the classes are.tough and her roommate is difficult. She mentioned wanting to co.e home but told her to give it more.time. it's hard.
Anonymous
09/02/2025 20:01
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Crying and feeling homesick/worrying they will never make friends, normal.
“I hate it here, i want to transfer”-fairly unusual, I’d look hard at whether they are depressed and/or the school is not a good fit.
“I hate it here, i want to transfer”-fairly unusual, I’d look hard at whether they are depressed and/or the school is not a good fit.
Anonymous
09/02/2025 20:00
Subject: How homesick is normal?
100000%
Anonymous
09/02/2025 19:40
Subject: Re:How homesick is normal?
It’s normal. And it’s hard. Everyone has to lean into it. Go read some Harlan Cohen. He has great posts on IG for both kids and parents.
Anonymous
09/02/2025 19:39
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Give it more time.
Anonymous
09/02/2025 19:39
Subject: How homesick is normal?
Our kid is having a rough go.